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September 3rd, 2010

Glenn Beck Birth Certificate Says He Was Born in Afghanistan

WASHINGTON DC - USA - In a remarkable turn of events in Capitol Hill, newly released documents have revealed that Glenn Beck is actually a member of the Taliban.

• Hague: "I'm Not Gay But My...
• Massive Investigation After England...
• Coventry Chinese Restaurant Employs Cat...

Bush Returns to Arena With Six-Figure Memoir Book Deal

TEXAS - USA - George W. Bush returns to the public arena since leaving office 19 months ago with a memoir and some words of wisdom for those who buy the...

Could This be the New SuBo?

COVENTRY - England - Britain's Got Talent judges and the British public have been astounded by the latest piece of massive talent to come out of our great...

George Michael Looking Forward to Jail

LONDON - England - Pop singer George Michael has revealed his joy at the prospect of being sent to jail for reckless driving while under the influence of drugs.

Tony Blair Book Bestseller in Iraq

BAGHDAD - Iraq - Former British Prime Minister, Tony Blair, made a surprise visit to the war-torn capital city today to attend a much appreciated book signing.

Government Pathologist Says Dr. Kelly's Death 'Textbook Suicide'

LONDON - England - The untimely death of Iraq weapons expert, David Kelly, was a "textbook case" of suicide, according to the government appointed...

Fury as Furious Politicians Spit Fury at Furious Voters

LONDON - England - There was fury at a rally in Parliament square yesterday as furious crowds of furious protesters reacted furiously to furious Coalition...

Obama Having White House Redecorated During Vacation

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Barack Hussein Obama is having the White House redecorated to suit his tastes better whilst he and his family enjoy their sixth vacation...

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Why Social Networking Has... WASHINGTON DC - USA - Once upon a time it used to be quite hard for the government and criminals to get private data from individuals, nowadays the...

Universities Teach... NEWCASTLE - England - Universities will be forced to give compulsory courses to...

It Beggars Belief: How... WESTMINSTER - England - Their apparently pitiful existence and pleas for money...

Recession Britain:... LONDON - England - In a bid to increase productivity during the recession,...

Spanish Hotel Wants... MARBELLA - Spain - The $4000 per night Hotel Villa Padierna in which Michelle...




Sweat Shop Owner Philip Green to Review Government Spending LONDON - England - Billionaire sweat shop owner, Sir Philip Green, has been appointed by the PM to review government spending. Ground Zero Mosque to be Spectacular Say Americans NEW YORK - USA - Americans are eagerly awaiting the unveiling of the huge Islamic mosque which is currently being constructed on the site of the demolished... Gazza Visits Flood Hit Pakistan SINDH - Pakistan - Ex-champion footballer Paul Gascoigne has flown out to the devastated areas of Pakistan to bring much needed relief to the thousands of... Armed Robber Forces Local Bank to Lend STOKE-ON-TRENT - England - Susan Benson, 34, was so desperate for a bank loan for her new flower business that she took it upon herself to acquire the loan...


World Cloned Cows Attack Farm Visitors After... CHESHIRE - England - There was mayhem and chaos at a cloned...	World The EU: 'More Tax Please You're British' BRUSSELS - Belgium - The British people will now have to...	World Urgent Appeal for Donations to Save... WINDSOR - England - The Daily Squib is appealing to our...

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DAILY SQUIB NEWS

• Hillary Clinton Eats Fly Off Obama's Face

• Obama to be Reprogrammed in Sleep Says Pentagon

• Unite Airlines to Launch New Transatlantic Service

• Times Disappears From Internet

• Gordon Brown Now a Kirkcaldy Homeless Tramp

• Americans Get to Keep Moron

• Swarms of Giant Bees Attacking South African World Cup Stadiums

• England Goalie Outdone by American Oil Slick

• Obama: "British Should Apologise for American Built Gulf Coast Oil Rig Disaster"

• Daily Squib Briefly Loses 'AAAA' Rating After S&P Error

Fair and Balanced News Updates

Evil BP Chief to Star in Hollywood Blockbuster

LOUISIANA - USA - Studio executives for Warner Bros have flown down to the oil disaster area to recruit the English CEO of BP after seeing him on television...

UK Sado-Masochists Hail Cameron's 'Years of Pain Ahead' Speech

LONDON - England - There was widespread joy amongst many practicing sado-masochists in the UK yesterday after prime minister, David Cameron, made his fateful...

Roseanne Barr Barred From Visiting Guatemala After Causing Disaster

GUATEMALA CITY - Guatemala - An impromptu visit by American TV Sitcom star Roseanne Barr caused a 200ft deep sink hole which in turn swallowed up a...

Another Pump and Dump Day at the Markets

NEW YORK - USA - It was business as usual at the NYSE as stocks fell by over 300 points on the Dow Jones index on Friday after rising by 300 points the...

Israeli PM Says British Mass Murderer Derrick Bird Was Acting in Self-Defence

CUMBRIA - England - Israeli prime minister, Binyamin Netanyahu, has defended the British mass murderer who killed 12 people in cold blood on Wednesday as...

Al Gore Satanic Heavy Metal Fetish Cited in Tipper Gore Divorce

NASHVILLE - USA - Al Gore would rock out to 'satanic' heavy metal bands and perform rituals in the family home, divorce lawyers for ex-wife Tipper Gore have...

I Will Re-awaken Enterprise by Increasing Taxation Says David Cameron

LONDON - England - David Cameron will pledge today to “reopen Britain for more recession” as he lays out his vision of a more taxed economy, less reliant on...

Daily Squib Reader Offer: Luxury Cruises Off Coast of Israel

INTERNATIONAL WATERS - Mediterranean Sea - The Daily Squib is offering every reader an offer they can't refuse. How about a luxury cruise along the Israeli...

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