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Grandmaster Putin Playing Biden Like a Flute

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MOSCOW - Russia - Compared to Grandmaster Putin, Joe Biden is about as sharp as a blunt butter knife. The Russians are running rings around the weak USA.

Leaky Harry Not Trusted by Royals Any More

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MONTECITO - USA - Due to multiple leaks of private conversations to the press from Harry, he is no longer trusted by the royal family.

PRODUCT RECALL: “Maxine Waters Vindictive Raisins” Taken Off Supermarket Shelves

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WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - Nationwide supermarkets are urging an urgent recall of "Maxine Waters Vindictive Raisins" products due to adverse violent affects if ingested.