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Sunday, February 8, 2026
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What Would Blackadder Say About Chancellor Reeves?

BALDRICK: My lord, I think the country’s gone and maxed out its credit card on magic beans and a unicorn subscription.

BLACKADDER: Yes, Baldrick, and those beans are now being force-fed through the arse to working families, boiled in the devil’s gravy of yet more tax rises. Meanwhile, Her Chancellorness flits about Westminster like a tippling moth in a candle shop, promising fiscal discipline while juggling flaming debt torches blindfolded.

What was meant to be a sensible Spending Review turned out to be less “review,” more “spending,” with all the poise of a drunken giraffe on ice. Instead of sound financial stewardship, we got a Winter Fuel Fiasco, a £100 billion imperial fire sale of the Chagos Islands, and enough union handouts to fund a conga line through the Treasury.

She calls herself the “Iron Chancellor,” but under pressure she buckles faster than a belt on a randy sailor’s trousers — which is impressive, given they usually wear string. Promises were made –– no new taxes, lower borrowing, pensioner protection — and then reversed with such frequency that even her U-turns are making U-turns.

The only constant in her beef-witted economic philosophy is inconsistency. It’s less “long-term plan” and more “improvised interpretive dance on a financial landmine.”

Even her own party now circle her like vultures eyeing a wilting pheasant. The unions sniff blood, Cabinet colleagues smell weakness, and the Prime Minister’s only economic strategy appears to be “pretend it’s not happening and shout about the NHS.”

And what do we get in return? An extra £200 billion in borrowing, £80 billion more in interest, and a front-row seat at the collapse of economic credibility. Her announcements are like a magician’s trick: “Here’s hundreds of billions in spending! And voilà! The public finances are fixed!” Sadly, the only thing disappearing is our stability.

BALDRICK: I have a cunning plan, my lord. We just pretend everything’s fine, and …

BLACKADDER: No, Baldrick. That is their plan.

Inflation has ballooned like an overfed mammering hippo. Growth is missing, presumed dead. Pensioners have been sacrificed like budgetary goats on the altar of pound sterling stability. The winter fuel U-turn? One minute, pensioners were told to wear jumpers. Now, apparently, the economy’s so “robust” we can reverse that — though no one told the economists, who remain curled in a foetal position, whispering “God help us” into spreadsheets.

Business confidence? Rock bottom. Payrolls plummeting. Unemployment climbing like a joiner squirrel on Red Bull. And still, our rampallian Chancellor stands firm in her belief that only the government can create jobs, which is odd, given that every time they intervene, three more businesses fall into the Thames much like a heavy turd ejected from a peasant’s rank bottom. Plop!

Defence? We’re pledging 3% of GDP on national security …eventually. But first, we’re paying Mauritius billions to lease back our own island, while the global stage heats up faster than Angela Rayner’s flaming furry hamster.

And the sodden-witted Home Office? Drowning in asylum costs, while the number of illegal crossings soars. Though, don’t worry — they’ve formed a task force. Or was it a focus group? Either way, nothing’s happening.

Instead of facing the music, the Chancellor waltzes around blaming everyone else. But her socialist sashay of high spending, bloated borrowing and blunderous taxes leaves Britain wobbling on the edge of an economic banana skin.

I think I need to vomit, hand me that bucket Baldrick.

If we were in charge? No more growth-choking taxes, no more swollen parcel of bureaucratic dropsies bloated like a Baldrick breakfast of turnip. Just a good, old-fashioned revival of work, enterprise, and not spending money we haven’t got, that is, apart from at Mrs. Miggins’ Pie Shop.

But alas, the bill is here. Working families and businesses will pay it in higher taxes, fewer chances, and a future built on IOUs and empty promises.

As for the Chancellor –- she’s not just unaffordable. She’s unreturnable.

China and U.S. Reach Consensus in Trade Talks, Emphasising Cooperation

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China and the United States have made notable progress in resolving economic and trade issues following two days of candid discussions in London, marking the first meeting under their new economic and trade consultation mechanism, sources from China reveal.

The talks, held June 9–10, followed a June 5 phone call between Presidents Xi Jinping and Donald Trump. Both sides agreed in principle to implement the leaders’ consensus and build upon prior progress made in Geneva in May.

Leading the delegations were Chinese Vice Premier He Lifeng and U.S. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, along with U.S. Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick and Trade Representative Jamieson Greer. The meeting was seen as an important step toward stabilising bilateral relations under strategic guidance from both presidents.

China reaffirmed its stance on dialogue rooted in equality and mutual benefit, while emphasising that cooperation brings shared benefits, and confrontation harms both parties. The U.S. was urged to resolve trade disputes through constructive and equitable engagement.

In the wake of the Geneva meeting, both countries agreed to reduce 91% of their respective tariffs, with an additional 90-day suspension on reciprocal tariffs. The resulting tariff relief has already spurred economic activity: U.S.-bound container bookings from China surged nearly 300%, and daily outbound shipments from Shenzhen’s Yantian Port rose by over 60%.

Experts say the London talks helped clarify unresolved issues and restored momentum in China-U.S. economic relations. Officials on both sides expressed hope that the progress made would build mutual trust and support the healthy development of future trade ties.

At Least Mauritians Get Tax Cuts Thanks to Labour Chagos Surrender Deal

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There are no tax cuts in Britain, just more tax increases upon tax increases. The Mauritian government, who are now subjects of China’s Belt and Road Initiative, are using Keir Starmer’s decolonisation Labour Chagos surrender deal funding of £100 million per annum paid for the next 99 years to pay for these tax cuts. The surrender deal by the UK has also been gladly accepted by the Chinese Communist Party as one that benefits China greatly in strategic terms.

Britain has essentially surrendered its own territory and will be wasting over £130 billion in money that could have been spent on its own armed forces and defence capabilities.

The Labour Chagos surrender deal is a disgraceful capitulation of British sovereign territory for no reason at all, and what’s the icing on the cake, a CCP affiliated judge was responsible for pushing the deal to occur.

When war does come, Britain will now be more vulnerable and basically an open door for its enemies thanks to Labour. No surprises there of course, with open borders already in place, and open taxpayer funds to give away to all and sundry, open doors for Britain’s enemies is something that goes along with Labour’s profligate wasteful spending sprees that will bankrupt the UK for the next 100 years.

Peaceful Looters Protest Against Mexican Deportations

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Peaceful looters have been busy all night in Los Angeles doing what they do best — looting. Mayor Karen Bass of the Venceremos Brigade praised their peaceful nature as they caused millions of dollars of damage.

“Thank you for looting. Your greed and violent behaviour is a credit to the city and the values of the Democrat Party. Please carry on doing what you are doing to protest the heinous ICE immigration deportations of violent and dangerous criminals.”

Meanwhile, a teary-eyed and profoundly proud Gavin Newsom hailed the looting as “young people simply doing what they do best” and said that Trump’s show of force was “undemocratic”.

“Looting is a 42nd Amendment right for illegal immigrants and hoodlums. By deploying the National Guard to stop looters is a hate crime against our Founding Fathers and Democracy,” Newsom said.

As always the case in these situations, bookshops were untouched.

Vindictive Far-left Wokists Force Top Show Off Air on GB News

Greek owned news station GB News has been tragically forced to dump their best show Headliners, which was a keynote semi-satirical attraction for many viewers who enjoy a smattering of sharp anti-woke cocaine fuelled humour. There is no way any human can talk and think that fast without the assistance of some kind of powder. But seriously, it was a great show, and thanks to some vindictive far-leftist cunts who made a huge effort to organise themselves into a cancel culture snitch mob to complain and whine to OFCOM (the TV regulatory body) the show was now on its last legs.

Instead of Headliners, GB News viewers now have to contend with another bubble — Patrick Christys (half Greek, half Irish), who, although he aligns with anti-woke sentiment, does get a bit grating after a while.

The King Has “Accidentally” Executed the Mayor of London

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What was supposed to be a routine knighting ceremony for the Mayor of London Sadiq Khan turned out to be a rather messy experience for King Charles III, as he partially beheaded the mayor instead.

“There were cheers all around as the mayor’s jugular was severed and his head partially sort of fell orf,” one of the palace courtiers remarked.

It’s a bit of a hit-and-miss business this knighting stuff, but one gets by, and today King Charles was on his 15th knighting, and it was all getting a bit too much.

execution of sadiq khan by king
“Take that!”

Hanging by a few remaining sinews, the head was swiftly and cleanly dispatched by the king, because he likes things to be done in a somewhat proper manner.

Sadiq Khan’s head will be displayed at Traitor’s Gate at the Tower of London for a week, then it will be displayed on a pike at Tower Hill until the flies get too bothersome. The Mayor of London will be remembered as the person who brought vast levels of crime and misery to the capital city.

Tourists are urged to book tickets in earnest while the head is still fresh at the Tower of London.

BREAKING: Peaceful Protestors Now Shooting at Police in Los Angeles

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The supposedly “peaceful” protests in Los Angeles have taken a deadly turn, with live firearms being discharged at the police and National Guard who are trying to keep the peace.

Mayor Karen Bass and Governor Gavin Newsom wrongly stated that the protests were “peaceful” and that President Trump had overreached with Federal assistance by deploying the National Guard and Marines, this was despite much arson, vandalism, violence and looting of local businesses. The latest escalation now involves live firearms being discharged at law enforcement officers.

Story developing …

My Job Tax Policies Have Increased Unemployment by 4.6%

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Comrades, today I announce more wonderful news about the economy. Because of my punitive job taxes on Soviet British businesses, unemployment is up by a walloping 4.6%. How good is that?

Not only are businesses dumping staff, but they are not hiring any more, and it’s all because of my “growth” policies. You see, I’m growing the unemployment level.

The lovely people at the ONS have also released figures that job vacancies fell by 63,000 — the lowest since April 2021. This is a great sign that the vile capitalist remnants of the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain are dying a slow, protracted death thanks to my anti-business policies.

The wealthy have all left the PRSB, as well, so there will never be any trickle-down economics in this country ever again.

Our interest payments on Soviet Britain’s debt are also on the up at £4.3 billion per month. Comrades, it’s okay though, I will be borrowing more so that our debt levels increase further. I’m good with numbers. 2+2=3

Hope to bring you more great news next week, ta ra for now and fuck off to the back of the unemployment queue.

INGSOC NOTICE 90377323-A9880-010111010-5U6K-T1T5-69-XX3

RONALD BUMBLENIPPOLES, 12, OF MICHAEL FOOT AVENUE, GRIMTHORPE, SECTOR 54, HAS BEEN AWARDED A BOX OF USED TOILET PAPER AND A BAG OF USED CONDOMS, ALONG WITH 0.034 GRAMS INCREASE IN BUTTER RATIONS. LAST TUESDAY HE REPORTED HIS BROTHER, SISTER, MOTHER, FATHER, GRANDFATHER AND UNCLE FOR CURSING THE NAME OF COMMISSAR REEVES WHEN THEY ALL LOST THEIR JOBS BECAUSE OF THE PUNITIVE JOB TAXES CREATED TO GROW THE ECONOMY. THEY WERE ALL LIQUIDATED AT GRIMSBY NET ZERO PROCESSING CENTRE 3LX ON WEDNESDAY MORNING. REMEMBER COMRADES, LOOK, LISTEN, REPORT!

 

Yes, summer’s here! This is why we are here for it! Let’s get it on.

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There’s something about summer that just hits differently. The second the clouds part and the sun makes an appearance, everything starts to change. People smile more, music feels better, drinks taste sweeter, and the vibe. Well, it gets a whole lot friskier, time to get my poppers UK out of my bedroom drawer and take them out! We wait all year for this burst of heat and freedom—and now that it’s finally here, we’re ready to make every moment count.

From the first rays of sunshine peeking through your window to the long, golden evenings that seem to stretch forever, summer has a magical way of putting us all in the mood. For what exactly? That’s the best part—whatever you want.

Goodbye winter blues, hello cheeky moods

Let’s be honest—winter can be a bit of a buzzkill. The heavy coats, the short days, the endless grey skies… not exactly the sexiest of seasons. But summer? Summer throws open the windows, peels off the layers, and says, “Go on, live a little.”

And we do. We start to feel ourselves again. More confident, more relaxed, and more up for a good time. Our adult toys box can go into hiding, and we go out looking for the real thing. Of course, it is also time to stock up on some of the best poppers.

Whether it’s a beach trip, a city break, or just dancing at a festival until the sun comes up, something about summer unleashes our playful side. Suddenly, a simple iced coffee feels like a celebration, a picnic in the park turns flirty, and even a walk through town becomes a runway strut.

Everyone’s hot, and not just because of the weather

Let’s talk about the glow-up. Summer bodies, sure—but more importantly, summer energy. There’s an electricity in the air. Maybe it’s the vitamin D, maybe it’s the tiny shorts, or maybe it’s the fact that people finally start showing some skin and some sass. Either way, the streets start looking like a scene from a music video, and let’s just say—we’re not angry about it.

Whether you’re single, taken, or just vibing with yourself, the whole season is one big flirt-fest. Parks become prime people-watching zones. Rooftop bars feel like adult playgrounds. And those long, lazy afternoons? They’re perfect for finding a little… company.

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Holidays are booked, and so are we

Summer means holidays, and holidays mean freedom. You’ve got your suitcase half-packed in your head already, don’t you? Sunscreen, shades, swimwear—and maybe a few adult essentials, just in case things heat up. Whether you’re jetting off to a sun-drenched island or just heading down to Brighton for the weekend, getting away is the perfect excuse to let loose.

There’s something about being in a new place, surrounded by new faces, that makes us bolder. You strike up conversations you wouldn’t normally. You say yes to that pool party invite. You wear that outfit that felt a bit too daring last year. You go for it. Because why not? Summer gives you permission to step out of your comfort zone and into a whole new kind of fun.

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Festivals, pride, and full-on fun

Of course, summer’s not just about beach getaways—it’s festival season, baby. Music festivals, Pride events, open-air raves—you name it. And let’s be honest, they’re as much about the people as they are about the playlists. The freedom, the fashion, the flirtation—there’s something magical about dancing in a crowd of happy humans under the open sky.

Pride, especially, brings a special kind of joy. It’s a time for being unapologetically you, surrounded by love, glitter, and good vibes. Whether you’re marching, mingling, or just soaking it all in, Pride events are the ultimate celebration of freedom, sexuality, and togetherness. And if you happen to meet someone while waving your rainbow flag? Even better.

Inhibitions? Never heard of her.

Here’s the thing: summer doesn’t just make us want to have fun—it gives us permission to. It’s like the sun burns away all the rules and second-guessing. You stop overthinking. You say yes more. You chase the moment and maybe explore things you would normally not. It is adult time, baby!

Maybe it’s dancing barefoot at 2AM. Maybe it’s a spontaneous hookup that turns into a weekend fling. Maybe it’s just treating yourself to new toys, poppers, outfits, or experiences that help you reconnect with your desires. Whatever your summer looks like, don’t hold back. You deserve every delicious second.

This is your summer

So, what’s the plan? Are you hitting a sun-soaked rooftop party? Booking a last-minute escape to somewhere steamy? Throwing yourself into the Pride season headfirst? Or just enjoying the feeling of sunshine on your skin, no responsibilities, and the promise of a long, hot season of adult fun?

Whatever you do, make it yours. Go bold. Say yes. Flirt, laugh, explore, and maybe take a few sexy risks. Life’s too short to sit on the sidelines—and summer’s too sweet to spend indoors.

Let the sun shine, let the clothes come off, and let the good times roll. Here’s to the season of no regrets and all the right kinds of trouble. Ready? Let’s get it on and don’t forget to get some excellent poppers at https://www.poppersupershop.com/

Enjoy!

White Flight: Last Remaining Whites in Britain Could Live in Outer Hebrides

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The report that white British people will be a minority in less than 40 years time was a no-brainer, you don’t need to do an expensive study to know that. A Leicester street where there is only one white family left is a harrowing story about the massive influx from Asia and Africa and other third world zones. Britain, thanks to socialist policies, has become a Third World country. Nothing works any more, no one can get a doctor’s appointment and the tiny windy roads are car parks where no one even indicates on a turn or is insured. The schools are full of kids talking foreign languages, the buses and trains smell like body odour and curry, and the universities are full of lucrative foreign students, who, if they were not there, would cause each institution to go belly up. White flight is a very real phenomenon, and it has been happening ever since the mass unfettered influx into these tiny isles. Whites in Britain do not have a future any more.

Can this tragic deletion of an entire race of people ever be reversed? Can white flight be stopped? Well, the only white people breeding are the subclass. The educated middle and upper classes have all but stopped breeding, and even if there was a slight up tick it would not make much of a difference anyway. Because of Labour’s discriminatory anti-aspiration punitive tax schemes, most of the educated professionals, entrepreneurs and millionaires have already left the UK. The Labour government do not make things easier for the population because any form of aspiration or growth is quashed on the spot. What’s the point in making over £100,000 per annum when over 70% of that is removed and given to the feckless, fake asylum seekers, Big State WFH pensions/salaries, or other useless profligate socialist schemes? There is absolutely no point in working hard in modern socialist Britain because you will never get anything for it.

Everyone’s on the take now in Britain. The benefits paid to non-British people in the country every year is £12 billion alone. That’s a very small portion of the massive bills that mass immigration creates, with no benefit to the country’s economy. The country is being bled dry, and soon there will be nothing left. That’s how socialism works, they bleed everything dry until there’s only one penny left, and then everyone’s poor, but here’s the twist — everyone’s equal then. That’s the final insult and the purpose of socialism as a political doctrine — equality. Indeed, there is equality in poverty, one only has to look at Venezuela or Cuba to see that, but of course high party officials there are the only ones who can afford a life of luxury whilst everyone else is piss poor.

Britain has been cursed with socialism ever since the 19th century, and the ultimate goal, as Lenin very firmly stated about socialism, is that it becomes communism. “The goal of socialism is communism.” If you look at history, you can see that socialism always ends in three things: poverty, destruction, and communism. The Great British Empire was killed off by socialists, and even to this day Britain’s last bastions around the world are being plundered and given away at great cost by socialist prime ministers and their decolonisation crusades.

english MPs third world India

Britain is now a Third World toilet. It is a dumping ground for the Third World, as they stream across the Channel from France, who are more than glad to have their navy escort the boats across the sea.

There is no hope for Britain, simply because it has been demoralised and defeated from within by soviet political ideologies like socialism and wokism. Its illustrious history is now a faeces splattered stain upon the annals of a time of past greatness, sadly now there is nothing left but mediocre grey monotony in death, a bloated carcass moving with maggots.

What do you do as an Englishman or woman when your entire identity is stripped from you, where you are made to feel ashamed of your ancestors, where your history is disavowed, where even the colour of your skin is now an anomaly in the country your forefathers existed for thousands of years?

The Russians or Chinese do not need to invade Britain to defeat it, because it has been defeated by the socialists, the Marxists, the communists. In fact, the socialists will surrender immediately to their soviet brethren, the Maoist CCP and PLA, if they ever land their boats at Dover. It would be a welcome moment of liberation for the British socialists.

The conquerors of a nation now come in rubber dinghies. They do not have to fight at the Battle of Hastings, they simply paddle over and get a 4-star fucking hotel, benefits, free health care, free money and free housing. No wonder there is white flight when this sort of nonsense is allowed to go on.

Socialism has afforded this insanity, because no one has to fight for anything any more, no one has to earn anything any more and ultimately without these elements of human achievement and aspiration one only gets poverty, mediocrity and a lazy useless pathetic death.

Britain has no future, not under the socialism of Labour, the Conservatives, the Lib Dems, the Marxist Greens or dare we utter the words of the Reform Party who will not be able to change the embedded socialist structures that make up the entire governmental state system. When all the civil servants, the departments, the NHS, the schools, the universities, the unions, the military, the entire fucking structure is socialist, no other political ideology can function over that base. It is nigh on impossible, unless the entire structure, the entire house of cards is demolished from top to bottom and rebuilt brick by brick without socialism, Marxism and communism.

Until then, it will be white flight to the Outer Hebrides for the remaining indigenous Brits, but even that place will eventually be overrun.