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Celebrated Brit Awards Rappers Can Only Say Three Words Repeated Ad Infinitum

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It’s the usual parade at the Brit Awards, a sad detriment to the state of today’s music biz, devoid of any form of creativity, real musicians, songs with melody or any form of true artistry.

The banal display of troupes of Afro-Caribbean descent rappers who had nothing to say apart from “You are racist!” were paraded in front of audiences who clapped inanely at their ‘genius’.

When one rapper was asked to back up with an example why racism was rife especially when the accusation was thrown at the PM, the answer was “You are racist!” repeated constantly with a generic drum beat in the background.

It was not only the Jamaican rappers, who accommodated the Brit Awards stage all saying the same thing on constant repeat, the stage was full of angry young female Jamaican RNB singers and their template songs this time shouting two points of reference, one would shout “You are racist!” then another would shout “We need more female talent in the Biz”. These mantras were repeated over and over again despite the Brit Awards full of Afro-Caribbean rappers and wailing Afro-Caribbean female RNB autotune template music singers.

Next year, the Brit Awards will be much of the same, and the year after that, and the year…etc..etc..etc..

Daily Squib Office Ordered ‘Sussex Royal’ Toilet Brushes Weeks Ago – Now Cancelled

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The Queen’s gone and done it now, Lizzie has banned Harry and Meghan from profiting off the ‘Sussex Royal’ brand, which has sort of left the Daily Squib office toilets out of bog brushes.

Our office manageress, who is not royal in the least, ordered online from the Harry and Meghan Sussex Royal website, some Sussex Royal toilet brushes (manufactured in China by slave labour). The idea was if you left a curler in the bowl and it refused to flush, one would break up the offending poo with the Harry and Meghan patented toilet brush, then scrape the remaining shit from the inside of the bowl not only allowing for a clean flush but also leaving a spick and span shine to the toilet.

Having back ordered the Sussex Royal toilet brushes, we were sincerely looking forward to using these things on our toilets as they get blocked up daily simply from the amount of traffic, but now will have to make do with a generic non-patented toilet brush. Sorry Harry and Meghan, but we will be pushing for a full refund.

One of our head writers, who writes most of his material on the bog was livid.

“I can’t bring myself to unblock a massive turd in the bowl then clean the marks from inside the bowl unless it has the Sussex Royal trademark on the toilet brush with a picture of Harry and Meghan beaming at me whilst big chunks of brown stuff get lodged in the brush’s bristles.”

 

Former Prince Harry Loving Time in Canada

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Former prince Harry is loving his time away from the excesses of the British press and his royal family duties in his North American hideout.

Harry’s aide has revealed that the former prince has let go somewhat, possibly the strains of family life with a woman like Meghan Markle may have something to do with it.

“Harry gets up at about 4pm, he then goes immediately to the television, he orders up the beers, the snacks, the burgers and the pizzas and stays there until 6am, when the servants carry him to bed. He then rinses and repeats the same regimen every single day, including Sundays.”

Things are going so well for the former prince that he does not even have to move when he has to go to the toilet.

“The former prince’s household has brought into employ a certain Mexican gentleman who stands by behind the former royal waiting for him to defecate. Harry will signal with a little fart or a squirt of piss that he is ready, and the man will get the bucket ready for the former prince to do his business. Once done, the prince will click his fingers and another Mexican gentleman will appear, he’s the wiper.”

When Meghan speaks to the former prince, he just nods his head in agreement and grunts before turning back to the basketball.

The Sussexes are currently enjoying many freebies, and are now known as the ‘freeloader Sussexes’ because they like to take, take, take.

Bernie Sanders: “I Want to Change America into China”

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Comrade Bernie Sanders, who recently won the Democratic Party Caucus in Iowa, has revealed to his socialist followers his plans to change America into communist China.

“Comrades, thank you for following me blindly and without thought. You are the type of people this country needs, people who do not think, are solely uneducated morons only out for a free ticket, and follow blindly without question.

“I have a ten-year plan for America that will condemn this country to a brutal Marxist regime of equality in poverty for everyone. Every person will have equality, but nothing much else. I will strip the rich of their money and property, and redistribute it to the feckless masses who never worked a day in their lives. I will open all borders by abolishing ICE so that the whole of South America can come through. I will disarm the military so that America’s enemies can find strength in their plans to attack us. I will shut down all free speech. My big socialist state will dictate and dominate every aspect of your lives..this is what the young want, this is what they will get. Goodbye, USA, hello Venezuela and China.”

Comrades, vote for Bernie Sanders, you will get what you deserve.

vote-bernie

Societal Collapse More of Threat Than Coronavirus

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All it takes is three to five days of supermarket shelves being empty for societal collapse to occur and the people who are unprepared searching for food.

The people who do not rely on the government and are prepared with stockpiled food and weapons for protection will still have the threat of dealing with those who are unprepared.

Anyone who reads the news will see the Love Island headlines as the world is gripped with one of the deadliest viruses in known history. This means most of the population are more concerned by shit brain-dead reality shows than preparing for survival.

Half of the British population could be infected with Covid-19, yet, the majority of Britain is more concerned with watching reality TV shows that dumb down the masses effectively acting as a lobotomy on the general population.

looting supermarkets

All it will take is a sharp spike in coronavirus cases in the UK, and the already inundated NHS will be completely paralysed by the mass influx of cases. Supermarkets will all be emptied within days, banks will stop serving customers and will halt access to funds, mobile phone operators will cease to function, and if rioting and looting in cities occur, army units could be dispatched in the streets to keep order.

Money will be worthless, and food, clean water, toilet paper, sanitary supplies will be the only bargaining chips people will have.

Empty shelves in venezuelan supermarket
SANTA ELENA DE UAIREN, VENEZUELA – AUGUST 12, 2015: Empty shelves in a supermarket. Shortages of basic supplies are common in Venezuela.

How long can your family survive without food? Every family should have at least 6 months worth of food and water stockpiled today, but unfortunately this will not be the case. Many hundreds of thousands of UK citizens will be unprepared, and will depend on the government to help in a state of crisis, however that help may never come, or it may come too late.

When societal breakdown occurs, there will be gangs of people walking the streets, house to house, supermarket to supermarket looting and violently liberating food supplies from those citizens who were expedient and who were prepared, therefore it is not just food supplies you should be thinking of but weapons that can deter these marauders. There will not be any police, and the army may not be deployed or available. It will be up to you to ensure the survival of you and your family — alone.

Workers in China Discover Thousands of Sealed #Coronavirus Corpses in Body Bags

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BREAKING NEWS

Reports are coming in regarding the discovery of tens of thousands of corpses in body bags discovered in an underground complex. Please note, it is very hard to qualify this news from China because of the communist state’s policy of a news blackout regarding COVID-19 Coronavirus. Some claim the images are from a film, however the footage is being transmitted on some Chinese networks and Tencent with testimonies from workers.

The workers who were employed to maintain an underground complex in the city of Shantou, Guangdong Province, China leaked the information via Twitter, and if discovered by the communist police, will be detained and punished.

According to the Chinese reports, rows and rows of body bags were piled up in an area the size of a football field, and this was only in one containment zone within the underground bunker, there could be even more compartments holding more bodies.

Chinese authorities have been rushed off their feet by the amount of deaths, they may have stockpiled the bodies in underground facilities across China, supposedly out of the way.

The incinerators have been running day and night 24-7, but even then it is not enough to burn all the bodies.

The official death toll in China is now just over 1,000 deaths, but could actually be in the moderate estimation of 60-70,000 or more.

UPDATE: Backsearching of the image is inconclusive, but  our conclusion is it is most definitely a fake, however it is being utilised in Chinese media. The body bag picture is taken from the 2014 series – The Strain by Guillermo Del Toro.

Story developing

Annoying Voice: Nasal Keir Starmer Can’t Speak Properly Say Voters

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It’s like hearing a voice through a cotton wool tuba, that is the truly annoying blackboard scraping sound of listening to Labour politician, Keir Starmer, who hopes to become the next leader of the socialist party of Britain.

“I can’t listen to him, as soon as he comes on, I switch to another channel,” one former Labour voter revealed.

Keir Starmer cannot breathe through his nose, and this is why he sounds so awful when he speaks.

“Why doesn’t he just blow his nose. It is so annoying that when he speaks I want to hit something. I can’t imagine listening to this nasal disaster every day through the Labour announcements and authoritarian socialist lectures he will give if he becomes Labour leader,” another voter revealed.

One man even suggested getting an electric drill and drilling some holes in Starmer’s blocked nasal passages.

“Just bought a Black and Decker, whenever I hear Keir Starmer speak I want to get the thickest drill bit I have shove it up his nostrils and drill. His voice is so annoying that I would prefer to be tormented by a dozen mosquitoes on a summer’s night buzzing around my room than listen to that fucking Starmer. The sound of squealing pigs off to the abatoir is a better sound.”

Hungry ‘Death Island’ Eats Another Soul

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Death Island is hungry, and it has to eat, it has a constant hunger for the narcissists, for the deranged fame whores who value nothing but their own selfish greed. Offerings death quietmust be made to the island of death of these pathetic greed-fuelled souls on a regular basis to please its appetite for the banal celebrity obsessed plastic people who populate this morbid dark Isle and their equally vapid audience.

Enter another offering, this time someone called Caroline Flack; the name does not matter, Death Island eats all with gusto, it does not discriminate, the souls fuelled by greed and celebrity power play, it gulps up these non entities who will be forgotten in a day or two, their crimes are many, their narcissism pure fuel that powers this moribund island and puts a big grin on its grim facade.

 

As the ITV executives and bosses count their stacks of cash grinning like demonic Cheshire cats, there is a call for more Death Island, more evil, and more souls to be plundered and exploited at the altar of immense profit.

The island will live on, in fact after its last meal, it burped with joy.

 

Fiction Prophesy: 1981 Book Describes Viral Outbreak Called Wuhan-400

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Author Dean R. Koontz, wrote a book in 1981 called “The Eyes of Darkness” about a Chinese military lab in Wuhan that creates a virus as a bioweapon; civilians soon become sick after accidentally contracting it.

Fiction and satire sometimes prophesize actual reality in the future, as can be witnessed in many a Daily Squib satirical article.

The Wuhan Institute of Virology, which houses China’s only level four biosafety laboratory, the highest-level classification of labs that study the deadliest viruses, is just 32km from the epicentre of the current coronavirus outbreak.

Of course, without delving into the world of conspiracy theory, one could always suggest there may be some link between the Wuhan Institute of Virology and this current outbreak in Wuhan, Hubei province, however we will probably never know, simply because of the level of secrecy by the Chinese communist state, and the sheer number of articles containing misinformation and fake news that are currently swilling around social networks and the media. An Indian study has claimed the virus contained 4 protein inserts from HIV thus concluding that bioengineering was involved, this claim, like all others is false, and has been debunked by many legitimate scientists.

wuhan

Every piece of data released by the Chinese should be looked at with a pinch of salt, and this is why when the mainstream media is seen quoting these incredibly low Chinese death figures with seriousness, you know there is something seriously wrong, not only with the figures, but with Western journalism itself. Shame on the mainstream media for not questioning the figures being released by the Chinese authorities, because what they are doing is damaging real journalism in the West, and aligning themselves with the Chinese lies coming from Wuhan.

The fact is, the death toll may be stated as 1,300 right now, but this does not take into account the thousands of people who died in their homes, or were not diagnosed. News directly from Wuhan from medical staff who risked their lives reporting the real facts state that staff only had access to minimal testing kits. Also news from the crematoriums, suggests they have been working day and night burning bodies for weeks now, since the virus was first reported. The death toll would therefore be in the region of 30,000 by now, but then again no one will ever know.

Whole families have disappeared, whole towns have been incinerated, and their records of ever existing burned as well to protect the Chinese authorities.

Would the West act in the same brutal manner as the Chinese if the outbreak reaches the same levels as Wuhan? Who knows?

One thing is for certain, with air traffic still open from China to the UK, it is only a matter of time till Britain sees its own outbreak of COVID-19. As for continental Europe, their free movement Schengen Zone will be the deciding factor in their total annihilation. The EU will never stop free movement, and have stated so emphatically, thus allowing the deadly coronavirus virus to spread daily unchecked.

https://www.worldpop.org/events/china

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How to Pick a Winning Horse at the Cheltenham Festival?

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The Cheltenham Festival is fast approaching and horse racing punters are gearing up for the biggest event on the National Hunt calendar. Hundreds of millions of pounds will be wagered on the 28 horse races run at Prestbury Park during the four-day event.

The Cheltenham Festival is one of the biggest race meetings in the world. The four days of racing are a punter’s dream and you can get bet bonuses from this website before wagering on the horses you believe will win the races.

Winning a bet on horse racing isn’t as simple as selecting a runner and popping down a few quid. It takes time and research to determine which horse you should wager on. You should also know the stable, jockey and trainer that the horse works with. Yes, there is a lot that goes into picking a winning at the Cheltenham Festival. These tips should improve your chances of picking out that perfect horse on race day.

Know the races

When researching the horses for a race, only consider the high-level races that they have competed in. Low-level races can be misleading as the horses may have only run those competitions as warm-ups or the competition may have been lacking. High-level races give you a better indication of how they will perform at the Cheltenham Festival. The Gold Cup is the headline race of the festival and is a high-level competition like few others in the world. Punters are debating which horse will win the Gold Cup 2020 and this guide gives bettors the latest promo codes when wagering on the race.

 

Consider the race distance

A horse that has dominated a shorter race distance may not easily adapt to longer races. Horse experienced in longer races may also struggle when moved down to shorter distances as longer races allow them to overcome slow starts. The race distance can play a major factor in a horse’s performance, so study your selection’s race lengths carefully.
Study performance at the racetrack

The Cheltenham Festival takes place at Prestbury Park, one of the premier horse racecourses in the United Kingdom. Horse race meetings take place at the racecourse all year long. Leading up to the Cheltenham Festival, a horse could compete at the track several times. Study the horses’ performances at the racecourse in previous events as there may be something about the racecourse that either improves or hinders the horse you want to wager on.

jockey racing

Know the jockey

Experts are split on how much impact a jockey has on a horse’s performance. However, experts do typically agree that a top jockey can take a great race horse and make it even better. Before making your selection have a look at the jockey and learn about his/her past performances. The jockey could be that 5% difference that leads to a race win at the festival.

Consider the trainer’s past successes

The top trainers in UK and Irish horse racing continue to win silverware. These men and women routinely produced top-notch race horses that compete in the best events year in, year out. Along with knowing the jockey that is in the saddle, you must consider the trainer’s past successes. Although a trainer winning at the Cheltenham Gold Cup or the Grand National doesn’t necessarily mean his/her latest horse will win a race, it does give some indication that can justify you making a wager.

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