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Monday, October 26, 2026
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Comrades, Once Again I am In My Bunker!

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Time is running out, comrades, and when I say ‘comrades’, I mean the few who have not turned on me or are queuing up for my position as supreme leader of the Labour Party. The People’s Republic of Soviet Britain is currently under attack from within, and I have maybe even lost most of the apparatchiks and commissars to the rebellion from Commissar Streeting and that disgraced ginger-haired monster Commissar Rayner. What can I say, comrades? My lies have finally caught up with me, and the Dark Lord Mandelson has shat in my cabbage soup.

I do not have much time left to reverse Brexit as my EU masters have told me to do.

I am running out of time to implement full communism from socialism; however, I believe the Labour radical Marxist who takes over from me will finish the job in earnest, so at least that will be something achieved by the corrupt, sleaze-ridden, incompetent Labour Party.

Once again, here I am in my bunker. I have provisions and plenty of Gorky, Sholokhov, Mayakovsky and Ostrovsky to get through these seconds, these minutes, these hours.

Last night I had a terrible nightmare. I dreamt of this awful brute bearing down on me; he had a grey suit with a red tie on and a duck hairstyle. His orange skin seemed to creep around and sweat bullets. He kept pointing at me with his big fat finger and kept repeating the word “coward” to me. Ooh, it was awful. Yes, I wet my bunk bed.

If you don’t hear from me soon, the Labour Bolsheviks have got to me.

Byeeeee!

 

Iran Conflict Reveals US Military Weakness

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According to Trump and Hegseth, the USA threw everything at Iran, yet they barely dented the regime, which is now fundamentally stronger than before the conflict.

If America has the supposedly strongest military in the world, and they cannot even take down a country like Iran, what the hell are they going to do against China?

Aircraft carriers serving slabs of grey meat and boiled carrots to their crew? How is that going to bolster morale in the navy? What kind of logistical planning was involved here, if any?

Not only has the entire globe now witnessed US military weakness, along with UK military weakness, but it has also shown the vast cracks in the so-called NATO alliance.

Add in the weakness shown by Trump and his unhinged social media posts, and the West’s enemies are now laughing hard as they plan for future conflict.

What has Trump achieved in this war? Where are the spoils of war? Where are the Iranian oil fields?

All those smart weapons cost millions, billions, all pissed away for what?

If you’re going into a conflict, you better see it through or not do it. Unfortunately, Trump is chained to the markets and is not thinking long-term or with the big picture. Fuck the markets. The job here needs to be finished. This is not a real estate deal; it’s a fucking war.

This Iranian clusterfuck is a product of bad planning, zero preperation, short-term thinking and arrogance.

Trump has only two choices left: finish this fucking thing once and for all or leave with nothing but shame and egg on his face. It’s up to you, Donald; see this through or TACO.

Strait of Hormuz is Opened But Not Really

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As is the case in these situations, nothing is black and white. The Iranians say the Strait of Hormuz is open again for all, yet the Trump blockade is still in place. President Trump says one thing and the others say another thing. Who says what does not really matter. What matters is the outcome, which is still to materialise.

The markets do what they do and react positively when, in reality, there is little to be positive about as talks are supposedly still ongoing.

Is this just another George W. Bush “Mission accomplished” moment?

Starmer: “I did not lie about my lie to appoint Mandelson despite my lies”

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Prime Minister Keir Starmer today emphatically denied that he lied about the multitude of lies he told the press and public after appointing paedophile Epstein’s darling Peter Mandelson as a US ambassador to Britain despite him failing security vetting.

Pointing at a blue curtain, Starmer said: “This curtain is red.”

Pointing at a chair, Starmer proclaimed in a calm robotic voice: “This is a potato.”

The PM then said, “I did not lie about my lie to appoint Mandelson despite my lies, and even though those lies were lies, they were warranted lies about lies and should thus be deemed as Labour Party truths.”

“I promised to clean up politics, and this is what I am doing – with more lies. You see if I don’t lie all the time or gaslight everyone, then why am I here? Why does my lie upon lie upon lie define politics so clearly as a blatant lie?” the PM added with conviction.

What about misleading parliament?

When asked about misleading parliament regarding Mandelson’s appointment, Starmer replied, “Can’t you see my lips are moving?”

New Report Charts Key Strategies and Trade-Offs for Long-Term Growth

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Thelatest World Economic Forum report argues that the emerging global economy will be defined by the rapid uptake of artificial intelligence, intensifying geopolitical competition, rising levels of public and private debt, and increasing environmental and demographic pressures.

Learn more about the Future of Growth Initiative.

At present, high energy costs and political instability are holding back faster growth, although sectors such as IT services, advanced manufacturing, healthcare and leisure are expected to drive output in the years ahead.

Issued in Geneva on 15 April 2026, the report suggests that the strategies which underpinned global economic expansion over the past thirty years are no longer sufficient. It calls instead for a refreshed framework capable of addressing a rapidly changing landscape shaped by technological disruption, inequality, and mounting global pressures.

The findings draw on two years of consultation with nearly 200 business leaders, policymakers and specialists, as well as a survey of more than 11,000 executives worldwide.

Focusing on four central areas of economic policy, Growth in the New Economy: Towards a Blueprint outlines both reliable strategic directions and unresolved tensions that will influence decision-making over the coming decade.

In the area of technology, productivity, and human capital, the report emphasises that sustainable growth will depend on improving productivity and developing skills, as knowledge and innovation become the main drivers of value. Governments and businesses must decide how best to convert innovation into growth while ensuring that its benefits are broadly shared, weighing coordinated approaches against more competitive models, and considering whether to prioritise redistribution or increased mobility to promote inclusion.

With regard to global cooperation and domestic capacity, the report identifies the continued importance of exploiting comparative advantage and diversifying economic activity as dependable strategies for expanding opportunity and resilience.

At the same time, it notes the need to strike a balance between international engagement and strengthening domestic capabilities, requiring choices between greater self-reliance and deeper global integration.

In examining the business environment and the role of government, the report highlights the enduring importance of strong economic fundamentals, including credible institutions, high-quality infrastructure and macroeconomic stability, as well as effective collaboration between stakeholders. It also points out that governments may take on varying roles in economic transformation, from limited involvement to more interventionist approaches, while facing difficult decisions on managing debt through either fiscal restraint or more unconventional financial measures.

On sustainability, the report stresses that highlighting the economic and social advantages of the transition to greener systems is essential for achieving long-term prosperity and resilience. However, significant questions remain over how to manage the associated costs and trade-offs, with policymakers having to choose between investment-led pathways and approaches focused on cost control.

According to Attilio Di Battista, Head of Economic Growth and Transformation at the World Economic Forum, the current environment requires governments and businesses to make decisive choices and accept trade-offs. He notes that investment in productivity, skills and sound economic foundations remains a consistently effective strategy across countries at all income levels. At the same time, leaders must contend with complex challenges, including historically high debt levels, widening inequality, increasing geopolitical competition, an ongoing climate crisis and the most rapid technological shift seen in a generation.

Donald Christ to Walk Across Strait of Hormuz on Friday

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The returned Christian Messiah, Donald Christ, has announced that just like Jesus Christ, he will walk across the Strait of Hormuz to show the world that he really is the son of God.

Writing on Truth Social, Donald Christ wants to show the world the tremendous superpowers he possesses and to bring peace to the world once and for all.

“The other day I was turning two pieces of bread into 5,000 tacos to feed some White House staffers. Jeez, they loved those tacos. One guy came up to me, a little Hispanic dude; I think his name was Rubio. Anyway, he anointed me as the Taco Chief in Charge… the Taco Messiah. You know what I did? I gave him another taco.

“Then JD came up to me. He suggested that I solve the Iranian mess by doing some Donald Christ walking over the Strait of Hormuz shit to show the world and the Iranians how to quit the war, even though we attacked them first. The price of oil should drop like a rock, but I’ll tell my friends just before I do it so that they can short it.

“Anyways folks. Watch out for Friday just after the markets close. You’ll see me doing the Donald Jesus walk, or shuffle, across the Strait of Hormuz. It’s not quite the Sea of Galilee, but it’s going to be livestreamed all over the world. Even the fake news are invited. I might even catch a fish, or an Iranian mine!”

Praise Be to Jesus Trump

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Trump just posted an AI picture envisioning himself as Jesus on social media. The fundamental Christians must be all having a collective religious orgasm as they whack over that image.

Trump is the chosen one, as he fuses his exalted self upon the state, the nation of America, as a Holy Christian Kingdom on Earth to lead his people through the trials and tribulations set upon the good and the just believers.

This image will now serve to legitimise his authority, discourage questioning and frame obedience to Trump as a moral imperative. The Donald is seeking to absolutely stabilise his key power base and structures and to limit dissent in any way arising from his actions. He is effectively telling you to hush the fuck up; he is now divinely blessed as a tool and messenger of God.

original jesus image trump 1
The original reference image for the Trump AI depiction.

Our dear Trump is now sacred; he is a superhuman, untouched by accountability or the regulations that ordinary humans have to deal with.

When the bombs and missiles resume flying, Trump will float through the Oval Office and cure the lines of lepers, blind people and TikTok users from their terminal affliction with a mere flick of the wrist. He will turn water into Gatorade, and feed 5000 men with 5 burger buns and two fish tacos.

God bless Trump and God bless America! He is doing the Lord’s work; stand back and allow him to do his work in peace to save the earth from evil.

As he sat on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to him privately, saying, “Tell us, when will these things be, and what will be the sign of your coming and of the end of the age?” And Jesus answered them, “See that no one leads you astray. For many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and they will lead many astray. And you will hear of wars and rumours of wars. See that you dare not be alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation and kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are but the beginning of the birth pains.

 

“Then they will deliver you up to tribulation and put you to death, and you will be hated by all nations for my name’s sake. And then many will fall away and betray one another and hate one another. And many false prophets will arise and lead many astray. And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. And this gospel of the kingdom will be proclaimed throughout the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.

Oh shit, Trump has even pissed off the Knights Templar, or the people claiming to be them on X. You don’t want to piss them off, Donald Christ.

hunter cure trump jesus

Loose Lips Sink Ships – Dear President Trump Please Shut the F*ck Up!

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In the nicest possible language, we’re asking someone in the United States with big enough balls and a direct link to The Don, to tell him to “shut the fuck up” with his social media rants. In a war like this, or any war, you do not want to give away your emotional state like Trump is currently doing. This is a serious sign of weakness in Trump and benefits the enemy.

Furthermore, we have noticed that Trump, during one of his prolonged speeches, gives away key operational details. What the fuck is your problem, Sir President? Do you think during World War II, Churchill or Roosevelt/Truman would make speeches detailing operational information, or making ludicrous, emotional statements with the word “fuck” in there?

No! You need to shut the fuck up. Silence! Nothing.

Is Putin going on social media telling everyone what he is thinking? NO!

Is Netanyahu telling everyone what he is going to do next? NO!

The Iranians are quiet; they don’t say anything, especially on social media.

The CIA needs to do what they do without Trump putting a spotlight on their operations, and this, of course, applies to the entire US military operation as well.

Someone get a message through to Melania or to the Trump kids to tell their dad to shut the fuck up!

SILENCE!

ZIP IT!

Go play a round of golf or something, or order up another special presidential clearance girl, or have another fuckin’ cream soda or something…just please keep your mouth shut if you want to win anything for once.

 

 

Intelligence Rumblings: Putin’s Russia Has Transferred a SATAN-2 Nuclear Missile to Iran

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According to some sources, (possibly misinformation) Putin has okayed Russia to transfer a SATAN-2 nuclear missile to Iran. The RS-28 Sarmat is a powerful intercontinental missile designed to carry multiple nuclear warheads and hypersonic glide vehicles that could wipe out any nation’s capital.

As we all know, and Iran has repeated ad infinitum, its primary goal is to wipe Israel off the face of the earth. Furthermore, Russia knows that Iran is a red line in the Middle East power play, and as Putin is a mastermind in tactical warfare, such a move would make the country of Iran a major player in the Middle East.

The SATAN-2 theory could also be used to explain why Trump suddenly had an about-turn and wanted to end the war so suddenly. Of course, not to alarm the population and markets too much, there was no mention of the Russians and their little gift to Iran.

It will now be inconsequential if Iran is capable of enriching uranium to nuclear bomb levels. They can acquire, or purchase, nuclear technology from places like Iran, China or Pakistan.

Remember, these are just rumours being pushed for possible views all over X and YouTube, but there is a distinct possibility that they could be true.

We will probably never know until it is too late.

 

More Good News From Labour’s Broken Britain: Shoplifting Will Increase

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In a country that values the rights of criminals more than the victim and punishes citizens who fight back, broken Britain is a place run by apathetic, out-of-touch arseholes.

Shoplifting is now a normalised activity that is not only ignored by the police but also ignored by the Labour government.

The conflict in the Middle East will invariably mean that the cost of consumer goods increases due to high energy costs in the UK plus the lack of fertiliser (due to the blockade in the Strait of Hormuz) because Red Ed Miliband refuses to drill in the North Sea. The cost of shipping energy to the UK is huge and a waste of money. The entire retail industry will have to raise prices from their already raised prices to compensate for the high costs incurred from delivery of goods.

Organised shoplifting crews can either clean out a store or target specific goods for theft, which they then sell on the black market for free money that is not taxed.

Some shoplifters in the UK can make over £45,000 a month, and it is perfectly safe for them as they are immune from arrest or prosecution.

Recently, a Waitrose worker of 17 years’ service was fired for tackling a shoplifter. Such is the malaise in the UK that even security guards in stores are barred from touching shoplifters, and if they do, they are also fired.

The message from the Labour government is thus one of reticence and apathy, which brings forth a green light for anyone who wishes to simply walk into any store they want and take what they want.

Here’s to shoplifting in the UK. Hooray!