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Xi Jinping Congratulates Chinese Virus on Job Well Done

Mr. Charrington
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Xi Jinping Congratulates Chinese Virus on Job Well Done

Chinese communist dictator, Xi Jinping today addressed the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) explaining how the Chinese Virus (COVID-19) had successfully wreaked havoc on the rest of the world whilst leaving China practically unscathed.

“Comrades, fellow Bolshevik warriors, Commissars and assorted communist brainwashed slaves. I am so proud of the exemplary work done to destroy the economies and people of the other countries we will conquer soon by our very dear Chinese Virus.

“Can you imagine, our beloved comrade in arms, COVID-19, has killed over 100,000 Americans without a single shot being fired. You have to agree, this has been a spectacular ploy and it is not just America, but all the other Western countries that have been dealt a lesson in Chinese communist warfare.

“First we whittle them down slowly until they are on their knees, then we will attack without mercy.

“Comrades, I know our cities are too overcrowded and polluted after years of desecration. Our population will soon have new lands to live in comfort, and with untold riches once our beloved Chinese Virus has devastated the other countries. Our people need room, we are already 1.8 billion Chinese, and soon all the globe’s resources and land will be ours.

“We have fooled those gullible idiots in the WHO, and the head of that organisation is firmly under our payroll. After the Chinese Virus and great army cleanses the world, we will move in and start building up our great Chinese communist empire, the one our beloved Chairman Mao dreamed of.

“I promise you comrades, soon you will be able to stroll down the Paris streets, Beverly Hills, London, Berlin, Vienna, Sidney, Moscow, and be at home in the new China. The factories we will put in Africa, and those stinking African slaves can deal with the pollution.

“May the Chinese Communist Party live for the next thousand years.”

<profound applause from assembled commissars>

 

EU Directive Will Force Europeans to Eat Insects For Protein

Mr. Charrington
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EU Directive Will Force Europeans to Eat Insects For Protein

While members of the unelected EU Commission will dine daily on the finest gourmet food from traditional protein sources like beef, chicken and fish, regular citizens will have a choice of maggots and insects for their daily protein intake.

The Farm to Fork Strategy is at the heart of the European Green Deal aiming to make food systems fair, healthy and environmentally-friendly.

Fried insects
Fried insects

Constantin Muraru from the International Platform of Insects for Food and Feed (IPIFF), an EU non-profit organisation which represents the interests of the insect production sector revealed the nutritious qualities of insects.

Insects can be produced locally and are a highly nutritious, protein-rich foodstuff that can be produced in high quantities in a small area, this helps to improve both the self-sufficiency and the resilience of food systems. SOURCE

Europeans were once acclaimed for their assortment of exquisite cuisine, but now under EU regulations, the peasantry will be forced to resort to crushed maggot paste and insect mush to eat daily. One could say it is not as bad as Soylent Green, but if humans are forced to eat insects in the future, who is to say that the next step will not be reconstituted cadavers?

“In essence, to sustain the EU politburo and our vast expense accounts, there will need to be cuts for the lesser population. You will eat insects, and we will eat filet mignon, of course, from the finest grass fed cows. You will drink maggot juice, and we will drink the finest champagne. C’est la vie, mes amis,” one member of the EU Commission quipped before leaving for their appointment at one of the most expensive restaurants in Brussels.

Bon appétit…

Why Online Free Bingo is Like a Religion For Millions of People

Mr. Charrington
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Why Online Free Bingo is Like a Religion For Millions of People

There’s something magical about the game Bingo that musters up an almost religious devotion to millions of people worldwide. We’re talking about those musty bingo halls replete with pink rinsed old women with their grizzled bingo-wing arms, the smoke filled coffins where people go to be interred for the last time, and might just get their numbers in before the inevitable happens.

It does not have to be that way though, things have moved on since those smoke-filled days, and with technology, so has bingo moved on. The clientele, is now richly diverse, and younger people are getting into the game as much as the older generation.

Whether you’re into the British 90 ball version, or the American 75 ball version, these days, if you want a game of bingo and play with hundreds of people at the same time, just pull up your chair, and log in to your portal of choice..and BINGO!

 

“Eyes Down!”

There are thousands of sites out there on the internet with Bingo on their books, but most of them are of the paid kind, where you have to pay to gain entry. How’s about a free game of Bingo? Yes, free Bingo is a reality and it can get you in the excitement without paying a penny.

You want to hone your Bingo playing skills, well, when it’s free to play and without risk, you don’t have anything to lose, and you can have some serious fun doing what you love — the religion of Bingo will capture your soul and deliver you to the halls of Bingo heaven.

 

Playing free Bingo though can be spiritual, especially when all your numbers come up and you win a cash prize. Okay, the free Bingo game cash prize won’t be in the $10,000 region like in paid Bingo games, but it’s still incredible that companies are willing to stump up cash for free players too. These companies make their money through advertising, and having you play a free game of Bingo is fine with them, because it gets them the traffic. Capitalising on the free cash prizes is still a good thing, and it’s better than a kick in the nads, or tits for that matter.

If it’s a question of what rudimentary skills one needs to play Bingo, take it from the seasoned players out there, you just need a finger, and an eyeball. That’s all you need to play Bingo, and the basic ability to recognise numbers. You could be in the most terrible state, have only one hand, that only has one finger, and a single eye, not being able to walk with no legs, and can barely string a single word together, bloody hell, stand up mate, you’re a Bingo champion, right there.

British Bingo Lingo

The only thing you will possibly miss whilst playing online Bingo are the number calls and their nicknames.

Here’s some funny ones used in British Bingo halls:

3 – Cup of tea

9 – Doctor’s Orders – (Number 9 was a laxative pill given out by doctors in WW2)

11 – Legs eleven – (a reference to chicken legs on a woman, usually accompanied by a wolf whistle)

23 – The Lord is My Shephard – referring to Psalm 23.

38 – Christmas Cake

52 – Danny La Rue

76 – Was she worth it? (reference to the cost of a marriage licence in pre-decimal times, 7/6d, everyone shouts back “Every penny”.

80 – Gandhi’s breakfast – Ate nothing

81 – Fat lady and a walking stick – The shape of the number 8 denoting a fat lady, and the number one, her stick.

Whatever your circumstances, having a game of Bingo can be a cathartic experience, and these days you just need to go online to get your fix — for free. What more can you ask for in these peculiar times of trouble and strife?

Lockdown End: Swarms Back on the Streets

Mr. Charrington
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Lockdown End: Swarms Back on the Streets

All over the world, desperate nations are putting their economies before safety, and ending lockdowns.

Once again, the roads are full of bumper to bumper traffic, and that pollution haze has come back with a vengeance.

The swarms are out on the streets, all walking together in formation, all in unison, there is no purpose to their stroll, but they are simply glad to be able to see other people and to walk together in crowds once again. Despite the Chinese Virus still being present, the swarm does not care any more, they have to do what they do, and be damned with any consequences that may or not happen.

The sun is a healer, and many are now enjoying the benefits of those warm rays upon their bodies, and souls, so who is to blame the swarms, they are of one mind, and of no mind, as they all swarm like locusts once again to those parks, boardwalks, beaches and beauty spots.

In zombie movies, why do zombies swarm together in crowds? Same reason that the post-lockdown live humans are doing today, it is a primeval, basic neural instinctual program that sees these swarms take place.

According to everyone, the science can be damned and the fact the COVID-19 Chinese Virus is still out there seeking more human meat sacks to invade is neither here nor there, businesses and schools must be opened and this will naturally bring the all too important economy back.

Bringing the economies of these vast consumer cultures back is a prerequisite for governments — people need to keep buying useless stuff they don’t need again. The Chinese Virus, has the same mindset, to flourish it needs the humans to swarm those all too familiar places, and its economy of spreading far and wide can continue once again.

The definition of madness they say is doing the same thing over and over again, and thinking you will get a different result, well, this is exactly what the deluded governments across the world are doing. They changed nothing, and learned nothing, and are attempting to continue as if there was no viral pandemic, purely for their all important economies. This is where they will fall down, and the Chinese Virus will welcome the human meat sacks and their urgency to restart their economies so quickly.

It’s going to be feeding time once again — the food is out on the platter — swarming.

Life in Los Angeles Treating Harry, Meghan and Archie Well

Mr. Charrington
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Life in Los Angeles Treating Harry, Meghan and Archie Well

Good news from the former royals who emigrated to Los Angeles filters through sometimes, amid the negative headlines.

It’s usually one of Meghan’s friends (Meghan actually) who reveals good news headlines to her controlled media outlets.

This time, Meghan’s ‘friend’ has revealed the good news that Meghan has had ass surgery to increase the size to Kim Kardashian levels, and then some.

“Meghan went to get more treatment for her 46-year-old skin when she got the idea whilst flicking through a magazine to get an ass implant. The doc did not hesitate and pumped her butt with gallons of silicone or sum concrete type sheeit. Apparently, Harry likes his beotches with back.”

Harry who used to speak with a sort of plummy, British officer accent, has now adopted a more American styling, according to reports.

Attending a Compton cookout on Saturday, the family turned up to their friend’s barbecue party where Harry gave an impromptu speech to the assembled ghetto people.

“We ghostrided the whip here, beotches, assembled some crunk to get to dis trap house niggaz! Y’all check ma ratchet’s new azz? I’ll be nuttin on dat laterz! That shit be costin serious gouda tho, watch dis shizazoe twerk, c’mon move it, ooh yeah! Ahmon git 730 on dat azz! Be trippin da jawn. Meghan, her gon get actavis on y’all talk sheeit about da atmphosfear and sheeit! We needs to git da carbon gaseous down n shiet! Wher da yayo at? Hmm, hmm triple cheeseburger some fries and a motherfuckin’ couple sodas and shieet and hot apple turnover and all that old shieet,…Who got the dub sacks?”

Surprise – Commies, Socialists and Remoaners Want Dominic Cummings Sacked

Mr. Charrington
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Surprise – Commies, Socialists and Remoaners Want Dominic Cummings Sacked

As soon as a single drop of Brexiteer blood is spilled; the assorted monsters, moaning mangled leftist cunt veterans, all manner of communist swine embedded in the system, agents of discord, flagellate themselves in a chorus of media encouraged faux outrage, all emerging from their dastardly coffins in a hive-like manner, all saying the same scripted words. Sack Dominic Cummings they say through pursed, salivating lips.

Oh dear, a key member of the government, and not some ordinary Joe went to his parent’s farm out in the middle of nowhere because his 4-year-old kid needed child care while he and his wife were sick. These were obviously extraordinary circumstances, and utilising a common sense attitude to the lockdown rules. Cummings thus did nothing wrong, and was simply looking after his family…and if he took a walk in the deserted woods to get some fresh air, whoopy doo da..

The vultures circling the so-called crime scene however have different agendas.

This is all about political point scoring, and damaging Brexit, this fake outrage is certainly not about some sort of ideological idealism, there is no doubt that as soon as the sharks sniffed the water it was all stations go, cannons and guns firing at once.

Once there is a taste of blood, the leftist media outlets will not let this one go, especially the talking heads jibber jabbering their nonsense all day long, repeating the same points over and over again, their Soviet mantra effectively brainwashing the hypnotised audiences.

Will Dominic Cummings survive the onslaught? That is a question of semantics and of circumstance, a perennial intrepid furlong in this beastly race to uncover more dirt.

As for curtain twitching neighbours, they will enjoy their time in one of the circles of hell, when their time is up.

Who is Going to Save Hong Kong From China?

Mr. Charrington
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Who is Going to Save Hong Kong From China?

Can anything be done to save the ever creeping communist Chinese manoeuvres over Hong Kong?

What can be done by the supposedly last bastion of global democracy — the West?

China confirmed on Friday that it would effectively bypass Hong Kong law to implement national security laws, which have long been resisted by residents who fear they will erode freedoms of speech, assembly and the press.

The West must no longer be seduced by cheap Chinese communist slave labour to make low quality plastic products that break easily and are sold in places like Walmart. We must assume that the days of cheap manufacture in Chinese prison-like factories are over, and the lure of massive profits by Western companies and their vast markups once they sell their Chinese products in the West are over.

The West must stand for democracy and the right to freedom of speech, as these tenets are extremely important. We must boycott China, we must bring sanctions upon the evil Chinese regime which is now waving its iron fist all over the South China Sea and even has its eyes on Hong Kong, Australia.

All trade and cooperation with China must be halted by all Western nations as a sign of unity against communist aggression, and this has to include EU countries. Unfortunately, the EU itself models its policies and collectivist ideals from China, so the EU will be a tough nut to crack.

The coronavirus pandemic has emphatically shown that China is a hindrance on the West, especially under the dictator, Xi Jinping, who definitely needs to have his fat head flattened a little to accommodate for the many lies and acts of treachery as well as barbaric crimes his regime has committed.

Hollywood producers who kow tow to Chinese money men to create films with propaganda embedded within the reels of cellulite must wean themselves off communist money.

The United Nations must reduce its preferential treatment of China, and aim to preserve the developed Western nations from the threat of communism and brutal totalitarianism.

The only way China should ever be accepted back into the International community is by rejecting communism and adopting true democracy. Also, once democracy and real elections are implemented, there should be more transparency between China and the West.

In the past, certain Western academics schooled the Chinese on how to adopt  communism, it is now time to help the Chinese adopt democracy.

With the CCP and Xi Jingping’s politburo firmly on a course for war with the West, it is hard to see any form of change occurring any time soon. This is why the West must not lose its democracy and rights, and must embrace freedom of speech and expression now more  than ever. The communist factions in the West, have tried for decades to align Chinese communism with the West, but people like Obama thankfully failed.

Meanwhile,  Hong Kong will be the man in the middle, with grave consequences.

 

Stand Up for Towel Day and Save the Rhino International invite you to a raucous evening of fun and merriment to celebrate all things ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’

Mr. Charrington
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Stand Up for Towel Day and Save the Rhino International invite you to a raucous evening of fun and merriment to celebrate all things ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’

Since 2017 Stand Up for Towel Day has provided a place to gather after a long day of towel carrying for stand-up comedy, slam poetry, sketches, improv and more in homage to H2G2.

This year, we’ve teamed up with Stand up for Towel Day curator Rachel Wheeley to bring you 2020’s edition of the event.

Due to the UK’s COVID-19 lock down, we now ask you to grab your towel and join us for ‘Stay in for Towel Day’ from the warmth and comfort of your own sofa.

 

Why Rhinos

Douglas was passionate about wildlife. In 1985 he travelled around the world, seeking out some of the most endangered species, including Northern white rhinos, resulting in the ‘Last Chance to See’ radio series for the BBC.

He became a founder patron of Save the Rhino in 1994, climbing Mount Kilimanjaro in rhino costume in the same year.

Douglas was a dedicated spokesperson for Save the Rhino until he died in 2001.

RSVP for the streaming link https://www.savetherhino.org/get-involved/events/stay-in-for-towel-day-2020/

We’re Off to Coronavirus Beach

Mr. Charrington
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We’re Off to Coronavirus Beach

The crowds and traffic jams are back at the beaches, so that’s where we’re going because we follow the crowd. We’re off to Coronavirus Beach this year.

It will be a great day out in the sunshine as everyone gets sweaty, and the sun tan oil drips all over the place. Yes, there will be very little free space on the sand so we will all bunch up together and enjoy the sunshine on Coronavirus Beach.

Have an ice cream or an ice lolly from the kind man who never washes his hands, or how about a pizza from the restaurant where the chef has a suspect cough, as he makes your pizza in the heat, the sweat from his greasy hair drips on to the toppings, and of course an odd pubic hair dredged up from his unwashed underpants always makes a surprise entry.

Frisbees and beach balls are in abundant supply all flying all over the place, landing on people, then others throwing them back, it’s all fun and games.

As soon as the sun comes out, Coronavirus Beach is the place people love to go and have fun. It’s seriously infectious, and will have you heaving for breath in no time with sheer exhaustion.

At the end of the day as the sun sets, everyone gets in their cars touching everything, and then goes home where they first touch everything and prepare an impromptu sandwich before retiring to beddie byes.

Hopefully tomorrow will be another day, so we can all go to Coronavirus Beach again and top up our tan, which is way more important than being in a pandemic.

 

People Must Start Preparing For Second Wave Coronavirus NOW

Mr. Charrington
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People Must Start Preparing For Second Wave Coronavirus NOW

We have had the first wave of the coronavirus, and despite the numbers lowering slightly, the first wave is currently still active.

The idiots who are going about denying anything is wrong, and carrying on as normal, are the ones who will get hit hardest by the next wave.

Dr Hans Kluge, the World Health Organisation’s top official in Europe, has revealed it is now “time for preparation not celebration” as lockdown restrictions begin to ease.

There have already been instances of coronavirus deniers who actively protested against lockdowns, being infected, and either dying or barely surviving their ordeal. These people, are their own worst enemy, but it’s not their fault that they are morons. There are millions of those around at any time.

Your Christianity cannot save you from the virus, as has been shown with countless church congregations and priests succumbing to the virus once they open up their churches again.

The second wave has already begun in China, where over 100 million people have been put into lockdown once again, unfortunately, the flights from China are still occurring, and landing hourly in the West. Once again, as in the first wave, the Chinese authorities will lie about the numbers of infected, and deceased.

Crowds coronavirus

If you are more worried about where to go for your summer holidays or which beach to frequent, you have your priorities all wrong. You should be preparing for the next wave, you need food resources, water, weapons, because the governments have played all their cards economically and the next wave will be the real clincher.

The opening up of all restaurants, pubs and other shops as well as employees being forced to go out to work, and schools reopening is a sign that not one single lesson about coronavirus has been learned or heeded by the so-called medical experts, and the economy crazed ministers in government.

cafe buffet

Europe should be preparing now. The second wave will be worse than the first, especially in the UK where citizens do not wear proper masks — not the useless paper masks. The coronavirus can be spread through the eyes, and stays on surfaces for over 72 hours. It can be spread by talking loudly, it can be spread by semen, it can hang in the localised internal atmosphere of shops/offices/trains/buses/aeroplanes and any other internal space frequented by humans. Do not think because you are in a park running or on a beach with others that the virus will not carry, because it will, and just the simple state of breathing over other humans is enough for it to spread.

As in all things, there are many factions, and many different voices shouting out what to do. There is inherently nothing wrong with that, but every individual must take it upon themselves to do what they think is right in the current situation humanity is in. The virus does not care for human liberty, or your right to whatever amendment you think counts more, because it will gladly infect you when you are out there marching for your fucking rights. It does not care if you are a democrat, communist, socialist, conservative or a fascist.

The Hasidic Jews have some forethought, and to see them congregating in Stamford Hill, London for a funeral is a sign that they have read their books, and simply don’t care any more whether they get infected or not. To them, these are the last days, and they really don’t care any more, they will bury their coronavirus dead in the traditional manner, and they will be infected doing what they think is right. Each to their own, it is their right to do what they feel right, as long as they do not endanger anyone else.

 

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