Sir Mo Farah is apparently not Sir Mo Farah and he was never Mo Farah in the first place, apparently.
Sir Mo Farah who was even knighted by the Queen for his marathon running skills is now technically not a Sir because she knighted someone with a completely different name.
In other news, I did not write this article and am a completely different person to the person you think wrote this piece of crap because if it was written by a real writer the piece would be really witty and funny but instead someone else wrote this therefore I am off the hook.
Prince Charles is not Prince Charles as well. He has just confessed to the media that he is in fact a Romanian migrant called Vasile Dracul from Wallachia, Transylvania, a distant cousin of some chap called Vlad.
The idiotic and greedy airlines who were decrying lockdowns during the Covid pandemic are now ironically wishing that we were all in lockdown again. Flight cancellations, staff shortages, no baggage handlers and airport clusterfucks mean taking a holiday for an ordinary person will require three-day waits with little or no information in packed boarding halls where people have nervous breakdowns and punch ups erupt every five minutes.
Modern air travel in the current climate is an ordeal many sane people would do anything to avoid, and yet there are thousands of idiots who are programmed to buy holidays in some shit-hole Spanish package holiday destination.
The airlines are their own worst enemy because they enable the hundreds of thousands of morons to subject themselves to travel torture by lowering ticket prices to fill planes that cannot be serviced and airports that do not have the staff anymore.
With stupidity on both sides in plentiful supply, the insanity will continue ad infinitum.
Going on holiday abroad? Ah, good for you! Pay no attention to the fact that these creaky overused aircraft do not have the proper staff numbers to check the planes before they take off. It’s okay, just don’t think about the fact that metal fatigue is a real thing, and the necessary checks before departing did not take place.
Imagine the amount of savings the government and taxpayer could make tomorrow if many of the useless civil servants working from home were fired immediately? The Big State is an enormous monstrosity that needs to be whittled down to the bare essentials.
Dump the useless QUANGOs spending trillions of taxpayers money on ineffectual tripe. Dump the lazy civil servants working from home in their pyjamas with vast salaries on useless jobs that need no skill and benefit no one apart from the civil servants.
Dump the myriad of governmental departments that serve no purpose at all and were creations of the Labour government of the past. Dump the useless local government council officials on £700,000 per annum sitting on their fat arses farting down phone lines, working two days a week and taking holidays in Barbados every three weeks.
Dump the useless fucks in City Hall, and TfL who through their Marxist fervour seem to enjoy their £350,000 salaries and gold-plated pensions whilst attending the occasional soviet committee meeting where they can discuss how to tax Londoners further for merely driving on the cunting roads.
Dump the entire fucking lot. The Big State is a sovietised construct. The people want lower taxes, and governmental efficiency — not this fucking bloated monstrosity of a government that trundles along like a fat slug over your prize courgettes.
Ooh! Aren’t you a lucky one? You are about to get the opportunity to win a free holiday in Sri Lanka and enjoy some serious sun and fun by the pool. It’s only the best for our readers. Check this out, bozos! You will be staying at President Gotabaya Rajapaksa’s presidential palace, with all amenities free to use for as long as you want. Yes, you read that right, you will be able to stay at the presidential palace for as long as you want.
The all-inclusive package includes breakfast, lunch, dinner and as much booze as you can drink. All competition winners have to do is walk into any store in the centre of Colombo that has not been completely looted, and take what you can carry.
Rooms at the palace come on a first-come-first-served basis, plus guests may have to share rooms with a minimum of 60-100 Sri Lankans.
There is a luxury pool in the palace, however please be mindful to the 10,000 other Sri Lankan citizens in the pool at all times of the day and night. Urinating and defecating in pools is seen as completely normal behaviour, as well as pinching both nostrils and snotting loudly into the bubbly pool water.
Amongst the finery and paintings of the palace, guests can enjoy the gym facilities for a full workout session if you can find a machine that is not being used by the hundreds of Sri Lankans in the hot sweaty room.
Sri Lanka Palace Hotel Competition Entry
To enter the competition and win an amazing Sri Lankan palace holiday, simply answer this question.
When there’s no food reserves left, what do people do?
a) Riot
b) Loot
c) Topple the government
d) All of the above
Please send your answer on a postcard to Squib Lanka Comp. P.O. Box 342, London, WX3 T2X by the 20th July.
You can’t get smoother than a greasy oil laden Rishi Sunak promotional video. First out of the traps, he is apparently leading the field and flying ahead like grease lightning in the race to replace the ousted Boris Johnson.
What are Sunak’s credentials to become the next prime minister of Britain?
Apart from being a backstabber, Sunak offers some hard lessons for Britons by doing “what is right, despite the pain”. In other words, be prepared for more high taxation for a prolonged period of time reducing spending, reducing business innovation and commerce in general.
Whoever thought that taxing people within an inch of their lives was good for an economy or stimulates economic growth obviously was not living in the real world. It’s all okay for Sunak in his massive mansion whose non-dom billionaire wife doesn’t even pay tax in Britain.
“The economic cogs are not greased, unlike my hair. They are instead solidly rusted unmoving cogs clogged with high taxes and costs stalling the economy, ruining the future for Britain and its children,” Sunak revealed in his video whilst adding even more grease to his already soppy oily hair.
I’m standing to be the next leader of the Conservative Party and your Prime Minister.
Let’s restore trust, rebuild the economy and reunite the country. #Ready4Rishi
Letting off Keir Starmer and his deputy along with all the other Labourite party goers whilst the full hand of the law came down hard on Boris for simply walking into a room at his work place and raising a glass of wine stinks of bias on a grand scale.
According to the map of England, Durham is somewhere up north, so that explains everything.
Next time there’s another Labour lockdown party, why not invite the Durham constabulary round as well?
You have to feel sorry for Americans who practically live in their cars and trucks. America is not a tiny country like Britain, where everything you need is in close proximity. The vast roads and highways of the US stretch on for thousands of miles, and many people have to travel hundreds of miles each day doing their jobs or running their errands.
Petrol (gas) prices are rocketing for Americans and eating into their pocketbooks. All the while, there is no mention of the impotent weasel Biden in the mediocre, biased media press rooms as the main cause of gas prices rising at the pumps. He can’t blame it on Putin forever.
🚨BREAKING: Joe Biden CAUGHT in MASSIVE corruption scandal, stealing oil from America with Hunter at the center
Will this bring down the Biden Crime Family for GOOD?!
China now directly benefiting at the expense of US consumers as a result of Biden’s insanity
“Biden is a piece of shit. In fact, shit is higher than Biden,” one angry American motorist quipped as he filled up at a petrol station.
The Biden administration is draining more oil from the US strategic petroleum reserve, and worse still, selling it to America’s arch enemy — China. More than 5 million barrels of oil that were part of the historic U.S. SPR release were exported to Europe and Asia last month, including top US geopolitical nemesis in the global arena, China, even as U.S. gasoline and diesel prices hit record highs.
The U.S. Crude reserves will leave from the West Hackberry SPR site in Louisiana in July on route to China.
“These actions are tantamount to high treason. Biden is fucking Americans up the ass by selling our valuable oil reserves to China so they can attack Taiwan, Japan and the U.S.” another furious American quipped.
Enjoy your insane gas prices Americans, you and many dead people in cemeteries voted for it.
Greta Thunberg must be fuming with outrage as her beloved EU denizens are now declaring fossil fuels like natural gas and nuclear power plants as environmentally friendly and ‘green’.
Members of European Parliament (MEPs) voted on July 6 not to reject adding nuclear and natural gas activities to the European Union taxonomy for sustainable investments, paving the way for the EU to include such projects in its so-called “green” investments.
The European Union have claimed in the past to be eco-conscious and to move to banning fossil fuels.
What the ‘green’ eco mob do not realise is that it is impossible to have eco-sustainable ‘green’ fuel if the earth’s population continues at its current pace. Many people who claim to be ‘green’ are low-information zealots who do not understand reality and live in a deluded state of eco-psychosis.
The Georgia Guidestones are sacrosanct monuments to a future New World Order where the global population is kept at a sustainable level in tune with nature, thus allowing life on earth to continue. Without the sustainable diminution of the global population, humanity will be doomed to a fate of immense misery, pollution and war.
Overbreeding and overpopulation creates extreme poverty, pollution, atmospheric destruction, terrorism, inequality and war. The Malthusian nightmare is very real; especially regarding countries like China (pop: 1.4 billion) and India (pop: 1.38 billion) increasing their population every year. Like locusts depleting earth’s finite resources, increasing populations are a direct threat to the very mantle of life on earth.
As a consequence of the recent bombing of the stones, the monument has now been completely destroyed.
Will the Masters rebuild the Georgia Stones? If so, this time they should make sure it is protected at all times. The message is too important for humanity’s sake.
The Georgia Guidestones
Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature.
Guide reproduction wisely — improving fitness and diversity.
Unite humanity with a living new language.
Rule passion — faith — tradition — and all things with tempered reason.
Protect people and nations with fair laws and just courts.
Let all nations rule internally resolving external disputes in a world court.
Avoid petty laws and useless officials.
Balance personal rights with social duties.
Prize truth — beauty — love — seeking harmony with the infinite.
Be not a cancer on the Earth — Leave room for nature — Leave room for nature.
