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French Riots: Never Underestimate the Level of Rage of the Disenfranchised

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Yes, France is burning once again as the riots and torched vehicles move from one city to the next. There are multiple variables and factors that cause splits in societies, but many are triggered by undercurrents of animosity caused by religion. The riots are in response to the execution of a North African teen by a policeman. If one looks at the trigger for certain events, the root, the initial spark; we only have to find the underlying cause of indemnity within the fractures of religions. The indigenous French are staunch Roman Catholics and the Algerians, Tunisians, Moroccans etc are Muslims.

Different religious groups of course can coexist within a so-called egalitarian society, however in France, the ghettos on the outskirts of cities and towns where the Untermensch are bundled into vast towers is proof that these forgotten disenfranchised people are deemed lesser than real French people. The French are some of the most racist people in the world, and some will admit their racism outwardly without issue, and others will keep the undercurrent simmering underneath the veneer of forced civility.

In reality, when there are vast chasms in disparity in groups then there will be violence, simply because the elastic band of hatred has been pulled too far back. These events are natural cyclical rituals which must be fulfilled to sate the gods of the respective religious and racially diverse groups fighting each other. France has a similar violent reaction as the Americans experience once in a while, yet here in the United Kingdom, not so much, possibly because the police are unarmed and lenient. Much like tectonic plates suddenly and violently snapping together, the earthquake of violence appears over time, only needing a single catalyst to release the pressure.

Humans are beasts that fear and misunderstand each other, these beasts roaming their supposed civilised cities and towns still predominantly believe in archaic myths and nonsensical unscientific tribal religions that only create hatred and animosity within this world. What is an organised religion other than a ball and chain from birth to some sort of tribe that was created by other men to soothe the thought of one day dying and as a supposed societal control system? Yes, you will go to heaven if you are good, and you will go to hell if you are bad — atone for your inherent sins, as you were born a sinner, and some guy who never existed, who could walk on water and turn water into wine will save you. Religions are borne from an almost slave-like praise of an unseen god who demands total control over the human and is watching and judging you all the time. This level of control over something that has no scientific basis in existence is possibly the greatest form of indoctrination ever released on the psyche of humanity.

Another key factor is that France is France, and the original Gauls have in effect been invaded by millions of North and Sub Saharan Africans. It is the colonial disease, and your silly EU Schengen system where free movement across borders means many things — almost all of them negative, and it all adds to the malaise.

The other silent factor is overpopulation. It is the silent ‘elephant in the room’ subject that no one dares to talk about, but is the underlying explanation for all of humanity’s current suffering. With overpopulation there is a marked increase in violence, terrorism, war, pollution, global warming, factory farming, desertification, flooding, societal devastation, ultimately leading to the entire destruction of the human species as all finite resources are used up, and the entire environment is destroyed. Once it’s gone, it’s gone, and there is no turning back.

May the fires burn, as Macron dances the night away at Elton John concerts, one can only dream of the swine actually doing something about his bloated fractured country. Instead, he will continue to dance over the charred bones of those who find their pitiful lives intolerable, choosing to die fighting. It is the only way they can express themselves.

It is all a far cry from the good old days, eh…

 

This Summer Must-Have: 3 Perks of Well-Chosen Awnings

Summer has already arrived in our gardens. Having an outdoor pool, sipping an ice-cold drink, and chatting with friends while sunbathing sounds perfect, however, with the hot season also comes some challenges – for instance, finding proper protection from the sun and reducing heat exposure. Installing a modern house awnings is an easy solution to create a perfect oasis for relaxation and functional outdoor living space. Read on and learn why this outdoor shading system is a must-have regarding quality sun protection, efficient temperature regulation (indoors as well!) and versatility of outdoor living areas.

One Long-Lasting Investment – Multiple Advantages for Summers to Come

House awnings can benefit your balcony, patio or any other type of backyard construction. Regarding efficient protection from heat and harmful UV rays, modern awnings:

  • Create a lovely shade of the desired size
  • Reduce heat and protects from harmful UV-rays
  • Protect outdoor furnishings from fading

Simply put, quality shades extend the outdoor living area during hot summer days and allow you to get the most out of your balcony or patio despite the weather. A modern awning also works perfectly as protection from mild rain, therefore – mould too.

More Resource-Efficient Home? Enjoy Awnings’ Perks Indoors Too!

Another most overlooked benefit of an awning is a shade for the inside of your house. Awnings can protect not just the outside furniture, but also the inside furniture. While it can get hot in-house during the sunny season, sometimes even open windows cannot help to cool down the air. The usual solution is an air conditioning system – a simple solution yet not without extra expenses. Good news – by providing extra shade for the inside, an innovative awning can also help you save on air conditioning.

Helpful tip – invest in an automated operating mechanism and enjoy an even more resource-efficient home. Compatible with popular smart home systems, automated shades can operate according to weather conditions. You’ll just need solar sensors to maintain a desired atmosphere automatically.

Experience the Versatility of Modern Outdoor Covers

A nice gathering in the backyard is also a great summer idea. However, evenings with friends can extend and continue well into the night. You might want to get some backyard lights or candles to brighten the space and create a cosy ambience. But with the right awning comes another easy solution. A retractable roof can have multiple features, such as integrated lights, and there’s no need to go indoors if it starts to rain.

A modern awning is a stylish and functional outdoor living must-have. It provides a final touch to any exterior and lets us enjoy the outdoors despite the weather throughout the day. Want to find the best option for your home? Consult with professionals who can offer various designs, mounting and operating options and other latest functions.

Beyond Satire: Harvard Scientist Who Studies Honest Behaviour Accused of Dishonest Study Results

Another ‘Beyond Satire’ story falls on our lap, this time through dishonest fakery of the most deplorable kind — faking science. Imagine a scientist who supposedly dedicates their entire career to studying the field of ‘honest behaviour’ suddenly having the acrid spotlight of dishonesty and fakery shone upon themselves. Yes, it is beyond satire in a scientific manner that is truly astonishing with its shameful despicable indignity.

The Harvard Business School Behavioural scientist Francesca Gino has been placed under academic leave after her colleagues found out she fabricated study results and falsified data in a 2012 study in which Gino and two other behavioural scientists concluded that people who sign honesty pledges before filling out forms are more likely to be truthful than those who sign them after completing said forms.

The study in question was published by the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences and featured data from an insurance company that looked into whether clients accurately reported mileage and other key figures.

“There is very strong evidence that the data were fabricated,” researchers at the blog DataColada wrote in their then-anonymous 2021 post about the study.

A month after the blog post was published, the journal retracted the offending study.

Though the paper itself suggests that its data points were directly submitted by consumers, the bloggers said that an Excel file lead them to believe someone connected to the study had tampered with its results.

As Wharton behavioural scientist Maurice Schweitzer told the NYT, this debacle has created “reverberations in the academic community” because Gino has “so many collaborators, so many articles, who is really a leading scholar in the field.”

Scientists fabricating data in their research studies is not an unknown concept, however academics who specifically study the field of ‘honesty’ and are ‘dishonest’ in collating their data is certainly a unique ‘Beyond Satire‘ moment in time.

Maybe Francesca Gino should consider a career change from science to politics?

Latest Global Woke News Bulletin From Your Supreme Comrade

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Dear Comrades,

The singular woke global communist disease, ahem, I mean ideology is going well and as planned. My 10-year collectivist plan is slowly coming into fruition, it is called the Great Leap Backwards.

We have indoctrinated the Western nations into the woke agenda, and many, including the elite of your nations, have fallen into line through cash incentives. Corporate companies have embraced wokism as their ideology because it allows for their products to continue to be manufactured in sweat shops and slave farms in China. As we daily commit genocide on the Uyghur people, they are also forced to work in factories manufacturing plastic shoes for immoral greed-driven woke companies like Nike, and we do not pay these workers anything. The suicide nets we have on all tall buildings ensure that communist slave workers get to end their lives making cheap products for Western companies to sell to their customers for huge profits and not as mush on tarmac.

In conjunction with the WEF, UN and EU, who we control and dictate to completely, as well as our beloved comrade Joe Biden, we would like to congratulate you all in indoctrinating your populace with woke communist ideology, which is demoralising your nations from the inside. Your entire education systems have been wokified, and under the guise of ‘inclusivity’ the communist woke system is actually an unforgiving exclusive ideology where censorship, cancellation and intolerance are daily enacted, fracturing and dividing your nations further internally. Your wokified Big Tech companies are the guardians who indoctrinate your populations daily and endeavour to create a hive mind of communist woke think, deleting, censoring, vaporising and cancelling any individuals who have thoughts of their own. Divide and conquer is a great strategy, and this is what we are using on your demoralised population whilst China is a united singular nation of strong citizens, you are being encouraged to indoctrinate your men in homosexuality, feminity, gender dysphoria, confusion and other horrific practices. Your women are being trained into being masculine, virile Marxist activists and deranged anger-filled social justice warriors intent on murdering any men who try to compete with them in any way.

Remember comrades, we are watching you daily, and through the woke ideology which we have integrated into your pliant Western society, one day your society will completely break down. Do not worry, Chinese troops will be landing on your shores and parachuting into your gardens to take you to special concentration camps, ahem, I mean to liberate and save you.

Keep up with your woke censorship, cancel culture because it is ‘inclusive’ and ‘tolerant’.

This is your supreme comrade Uncle Xi signing out for now.

Available For Next Christmas: Flamethrower Robot Dog

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The ultimate Christmas present for little Johnny to play with in the garden just presented itself to the world — a flamethrower robot dog.

Man’s best friend

The company Throwflame will present for sale in Q3 2023, the Thermonator, a cheap Chinese knock-off of Boston Dynamics’ Spot doggy, with a motherfucking flamethrower on top of it.

You simply cannot get anything better than this as a Christmas prezzy.

But hey, let’s be responsible with its use eh, you can’t just barbecue your neighbour’s testicles simply because he is a vindictive psychotic arsehole, please show some restraint when playing with this toy.

Yellow Coward Prigozhin Banished to Belarus

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Oh dear, desertion in the Wagner Group usually means a sledgehammer to the head, and no doubt ‘Putin’s Chef’ Yevgeny Prigozhin will meet his end soon with some spectacular accident.

“We give him top penthouse in Minsk, and one day he slip and fall out of window,” an FSB operative in Belarus revealed.

Whatever happens, it is game over for Prigozhin and his crew of misfits, even if Putin has shown weakness.

The lame war in Ukraine will continue limping along, and it is up to the Ukrainians to push forward and capitalise on the disarray within the Russian military ranks.

Beware of a wounded rat backed into a corner, Putin still has his finger on the red button and is itching to press it.

We Are Inviting Billionaires to Pay to Visit Titanic Wreck in Daily Squib Submarine

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Hello, the Daily Squib is inviting all global billionaires from around the world to pay us $500,000 each for a once-in-a-lifetime trip to the underwater grave of the Titanic.

This amazing one way trip will be from our specially designed prototype submarine we made out of fibreglass, sellotape, and gorilla glue. We also will be piloting the submarine with a Sega Dreamcast controller from 1988 which we bought on eBay for £3.25 on auction.

Titanium and steel is for pussies, the hull of the submarine is constructed from fibreglass which shatters when under stress. Look, it’s cheaper and lighter to use fibreglass, and as for certification, who needs that shit anyway.

The submarine was tested in a pool with a depth of 6 metres, and we think this is enough to show that the craft will implode at a depth of 15,000 ft.

If you are a billionaire, or better still, a trillionaire, please contact us immediately to reserve your place for your final trip. You will pay $500,000 to see the wreck of the Titanic just before the entire craft implodes and your body disintegrates into fish food. Do not worry, you will not feel anything, it will be a millisecond implosion.

The Daily Squib submarine can fit in five billionaires at a time, and once that one goes, give us half an hour to knock up another submarine to accommodate all the other billionaires lining up for the trip. All passengers will be required to sign a waiver after paying, stipulating that this will be a one way trip.

APPLY HERE: Squib Titanic Sub Trip, P.O. Box 3452, London, W1Y 3DA, United Kingdom. Cheques for $500,000 for each passenger must be included, payable to “Daily Squib”.

 

Putin: “There is Nothing to See Here”

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Supreme Russian leader Vladimir Putin has made an address to the Russian people about the Wagner Group army of mercenaries and convicts marching towards Moscow to hang him.

“There is nothing to see here, folks. The Russian army and people are totally behind me for sending their men to certain death in the meat grinder of Ukraine. While Wagner boss, Yevgeny Prigozhin has been visiting the graves of those who gave their lives needlessly for nothing, and garnering respect with the people, military and FSB hierarchy, I have done nothing apart from hide away in my bunker counting the billions of dollars I have stolen from the Russian people and economy. When the Wagner Group march into the Kremlin and everyone applauds them, I will be whisked away to an undisclosed location, or maybe they will put me out of my misery seeing as I have ruined Russia with my insane tinpot invasions of other sovereign territory.”

Behind the scenes, many operatives in the FSB are standing down, as is the Russian army as the Wagner group convoy readies for a Moscow move.

The cure it seems is worse than the medicine, as one nutter seeks to take over from another nutter.

We can only dream of Putin’s Armani suited body swinging from a rope over Red Square, whether the dream materialises or not, the delightful thought is still thoroughly pleasing.

Shoplifting and Looting Now Considered Normal in Recession Britain

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When a block of regular cheddar cheese is now £6.90 in the shops, and a loaf of bread £3.50, it is no wonder that many Britons are resorting to shoplifting from supermarkets and shops. The cost of living in the UK is now at insane levels, therefore looting and stealing from shops is a daily activity for many.

Bankrupt Britain

The Bank of England’s irresponsible mismanagement of the economy led by turnip head BofE governor Andrew Bailey (salary:£672,000/year), who recently put interest rates up by 5%, has further impoverished the population. This has led to formerly law-abiding citizens to turn to crime simply to feed themselves and their families.

“You walk in, take what you want, then calmly walk out without paying. The police do not care, because everyone’s doing it now. If I need anything, I just get it,” a grandmother in Anglesey, told the Sun.

Free for all

According to many new shoplifters, the cashiers are often sympathetic and let them go on their way without saying anything.

“I’ve got a whole bag of cheddar here. Cost me nothing. I’ll give some to folks in my area, or sell some. I only go for the big price items, like cheddar and olive oil,” a council worker from Berkshire revealed.

You may have three jobs, but it’s still not enough to live in a country that is now unliveable.

shoplifting

Julie, a mother of six from Wythenshawe, Manchester, regularly steals from shops just to survive.

“The rent payments take everything, so I now steal just to feed my family. I look at the greasy piece of shit Rishi Sunak and want to vomit,” the librarian exclaimed.

Treasury Chancellor of the Exchequer, Jeremy Hunt, told families on Friday whilst giggling like a deranged hyena: “People need to eat less or do not eat at all. Forget about ever going on a holiday ever again, and walk everywhere. Sell your car. You must enjoy your poverty, because this is the future for Britain. After I am done with you lot, you will either be dead or barely fucking alive. This’ll teach you to vote for Brexit! Scum!”

Shoplifting is now a normal pursuit for many in Britain, and is accepted fully by many people.

“You can’t get arrested even if you try. I mean, I walked out of my local shop with my hands full of stuff and bumped into a copper. He smiled, and said I dropped a block of cheddar. He handed it to me, and told me to get on my way,” a maths teacher from Solihull revealed.

Daily Squib Notice

We are in no way condoning any of the actions of shoplifters or looters, we are simply reporting what is going on currently in the UK.

Kitty Litter Boxes Installed For Pupils in Woke Classrooms

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Schools are now having to install kitty litter boxes in classrooms, as well as scratching posts for pupils who identify as cats. Some pupils also demand that they are allowed to sleep during classes, simply because that’s what cats do all the time.

Katharine Bhenchod cautioned that adult authority ‘is long gone’ as more woke children are being allowed to identify as animals and objects in school.

It comes after an 8-year-old girl was branded ‘despicable’ by her teacher for rejecting her classmate’s claim that he ‘identified’ as a toilet cleaning brush.

The ‘dumb headmistress’ and founder of the Panchod Salaa Community free school in Wembley, London, made the comments during a speech at NatCon last month.

Dubbed Britain’s dumbest head, she warned that parents have ‘no idea just had bad things are in schools’.

She said: “Do you know that some kids identify as pussycats?”

Britain’s most idiotic headteacher Katharine Bhenchod claims there are more cases of pupils identifying as other species as parents and teachers cave in to woke demands.

“Even though I am supposedly the headteacher, I have no authority over anything that goes on in my own school, and because I have been forced to be woke myself, I cannot do or say anything. In fact, I might as well identify as a lamp post or something because everyone ignores me,” Ms Bhenchod moaned.

Britain’s weakest headteacher Katharine Bhenchod claims there are more cases of pupils identifying as other species as parents and teachers cave in to woke demands.

“We have one boy who identifies as a skunk. He says it is his non-binary right to fart in people’s faces if he is scared. Another pupil, Alison, identifies as a stick insect and stays still in one position for hours. So far, she has missed twelve classes this week alone, because she freezes in position in random areas around the school.”

On Tuesday, during a maths class, one pupil who identifies as an octopus squirted black ink over the entire classroom simply because he said he was very scared of quadratic equations. The teacher could do nothing and everyone just sat there for the entire class soaked in black ink.

Julie Armshaw, 15, is a pupil at the school who identifies as a ‘radiator’. She now refuses to speak and only makes a creaking sound once in a while. During classes, she stands in the corner and spreads her arms and legs onto a wall.

Because being woke is celebrated throughout the entire school system, there is nothing anyone can do to stop it all. Oink, miaow, moo.