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Met. Police: “Criminals Free to Commit Crime Without Prosecution”

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Crime Free-For-All

There have been collective cheers across the capital from criminals as a senior Metropolitan police officer declared an amnesty on most crimes committed.

What this means is burglaries, assaults, criminal damage, drugs and theft will not be pursued by the police.

This new policy leaves a massive green light to criminals, not only the ones in the UK but across the world to come here to create more crime.

Albanian mafia member, Bekim ‘Big Issue’ Dragusha, who operates 15 brothels in the capital as well as runs a lucrative burglary and pickpocketing team, was happy about the new police scheme not to prosecute his hard working employees.

“Thanks to EU we come here and make big business. Some of my team sometimes get arrest. This not good for business. The news I hear from police today good news. My profit margin and ROI increase by 25% already. We are now going to bring over whole crew from Bulgaria and Romania. We talking thousands more of my wonderful friends into your country which we are stripping slow by slowly. Innit!”

New Met Police Dodgem task force on the prowl in the streets for no crime

The deputy assistant commissioner, Mark Plonke, said: “With the pressure on our resources, i.e. That bitch Theresa May has not given us the right budget, it is not practical for our officers to spend a considerable amount of time looking into something where, for example, a house has been burgled or a shop has been broken into and its contents emptied , or the victim can still walk after an assault. I just told my officers to stand down. In a few months let’s see what happens?”

There are even calls by the Met to relax more serious crime responses, like murder or rape.

“We are testing a new scheme in Lambeth council, where if you commit murder, you will be liable to investigation only after your third killing. With the crime of armed robbery, criminals will be let off if they attempt to rob a bank but it fails, and they will only be prosecuted after their fifth successful bank robbery, as long as some of the proceedings from the robbery go to the Met police.”

When asked about the question of crime statistics for this quarter, the deputy assistant commissioner just said: “No comment. I’m off to the dodgems at my local funfair.”

Time to spark up another fat one, and get the hydroponics kit out from the garage. It’s a free for all…

Mind the gap – the importance of Matic

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In the days before the Premier League your typical footballer defender lacked more than a little in the way of finesse. The strongest teams defensively were those whom possessed the strongest defenders – no-nonsense guys such as Leeds’ Norman Hunter, Chelsea’s Ron Harris and Liverpool’s Ron Yeats.

Some of the ‘tackles’ unleashed on a regular basis by such players would warrant straight red card, lengthy bans and even possible criminal charges in the modern day EPL, therefore defenders have to be more savvy, more skilful and less prone to scything down opponents.

This means that to be successful defensively, teams require that their midfield give their defence an important extra layer of protection.

It’s therefore no surprise that Manchester United have improved in spades this season following the capture of Nemanja Matic from Chelsea. Any kind of Man Utd tactical analysis would point to the deployment of Matic in the defensive midfielder role as being key to Mourinho’s men’s successful start to the 2017-18 season.

Chelsea’s sale of Matic from their 2016-17 EPL-winning side was an immense surprise, and,
judging by Antonio Conte’s side’s lacklustre start to their title defence, it could prove to be a costly mistake. True that in Tiemoue Bakayoko’s signing Conte prepared a replacement for Matic, but this is Bakayoko’s first season in the EPL and the £40 million received for Matic just does not instantly replace three excellent seasons of EPL experience.

Last term Chelsea conceded only thirty-three goals in thirty-eight games. So far this term they have conceded ten in ten – a slight increase. Last season Manchester United shipped twenty-nine goals in thirty-eight games which was not a bad return at all, but this season they have the tightest defence of all teams in the EPL, conceding a miniscule four goals.

There are of course other reasons why Manchester United have improved defensively this season (Phil Jones is having his best season for the club by far), but the impact of Matic cannot be under-estimated.

At the end of last season Mourinho was quoted as saying he was looking for a ‘Matic-type’ player, but the ex-Chelsea boss may not have dreamed that he would ever land Matic himself. Not many in the footballing world would have dreamed that Matic – still only twenty-nine – would have been allowed to exit the Emirates so easily, and especially not to one of Chelsea’s biggest EPL rivals.

Although primarily a defensive midfield player, Matic can usually be found all over the pitch – wherever the opposition has the ball, in fact. If Matic is not breaking down the play, he’s helping to recover the ball for his team. Last season Chelsea left the tackling to N’Golo Kante which lessened Matic’s typical impact for the side and may have convinced Conte that a younger replacement in Bakayoko was a good idea. Mourinho has used Matic in the same role – this time alongside Ander Herrera – and Matic has proven he still has a lot more to give in his career. Chelsea’s loss is very, very much United’s gain.

Feminist Model Sues Men Who Look at Her

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As she posed on the front steps of the Sixty Beverly Hills Hotel, Coco’s bold fashion statement saw her almost completely expose herself to the cameras.

The only catch — if you are male and look at her, you are immediately handed a signed form from a lawyer waiting around the corner suing you for looking at her body.

“I can dress like this but it does not mean a man can look at me. I am wearing a dress with a strategically placed metal ring gripping the two sides of my dress together across my massive heaving bust to make sure they are barely kept under wraps. That does not mean that you have the right as a male to look at what I am flouting. It is my feminist right to wear what I want, but it is not your right as a male to be attracted to me or my body.”

Coco’s lawyer had a busy time throughout the night as any male caught even glancing towards her was handed the form suing them for sexism and something that is called ‘eye-ball rape’, a new statute created in the California courts, where women are given rights way above any men.

One guilty man who was sued was close to tears as he said that he looked at her bust momentarily because there was pretty much nowhere else to look at.

“Her lawyer handed me the form saying that I will be sued for over $500,000 for the crime of looking at her bust. I have been arraigned to appear at LA County court next week. I can’t afford that kind of money, and I’ll have to sell everything. I’m finished!”

Arriving at the event and fluttering huge eyelashes, Coco provocatively partied with a host of other celebrities including Gina Tootitts, Marianna Trench and Lois Poussie.

Coco Mondreal has never been one to miss out on an opportunity to show off her incredible figure and will stand to make over $8.6 million by suing all the men who dared to look at her during the evening.

Exclusive: Fappening 2014 Leak Was From Weinstein Phone iCloud

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There was an extreme cover up after the Fappening 4chan leak in 2014, in which trophy photos of actresses in compromised positions were dumped on mass to the Internet as seen on sites like freshfappening dot com.

What the hacker did not reveal is the iCloud phone source where all these trophy pictures came from — Harvey Weinstein.

Weinstein fits the profile exactly, as he liked to catalogue his exploits. This is what sexual predator/rapists do according to criminologists.

The photo of a youthful Jennifer Lawrence wryly smiling whilst exhibiting a glazed face is most definitely a Weinstein trademark trophy photo. After those photos were taken, Lawrence was propelled into great fame via the Hunger Games. She, much like other actresses had earned her way to the top by being a ‘good girl’.

Any internet search comes up with a treasure trove of multiple photos of actresses in compromised positions, for all to see and download.

Fapocalypse

The Fappening photo dump is proof that many actresses in Hollywood have to put out, or get out. As much as the claims of walking out on Weinstein go, these are mere fabrications to keep a public profile and honour. There is no actress in this world who will ever admit she got down on her knees to get a role, for a start she has most probably relegated that awful memory to the ass end of her memory, an amnesiac trauma that is forgotten, secondly, to admit to such a thing would be career suicide. Instead, there is a wall of silence.

Weinstein had power because he could get these girls roles in films that would make them famous. He exploited this for his own pleasure much to the agony and desperation of these young women who needed a break — that final hurdle into the limelight and the red carpet.

Sadly for the exploited, the Fappening has come back to haunt these actresses like a bad case of the clap. It just keeps getting dredged up time and time again. Once the pictures hit the net, they are nigh on impossible to erase, a moment these actresses have to live over and over again, a recurring nightmare that ceases to go away.

One can only feel a certain sense of dismay and bewilderment to see such intimate pictures of assorted starlets displayed for everyone to see. Is there a ‘feel sorry for them’ factor, after all these are human beings displaying their private parts, their glazed faces, and their ultimate greed, for it is their pure hunger for fame and money that made them do it? There should be no remorse, either for them, or for Weinstein. They laid their beds all too willingly.

Is it Anti-Semitic to Chastise Monster Harvey Weinstein?

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“He is a Jew who used his position of power to get young poor Gentile women to submit to him sexually on promises of stardom. I wouldn’t say this is something that is new, but I feel there is a lot of anti-semitic feeling against Weinstein. For example, if it was a Christian director who did these horrible things, they would just brush it under the carpet, but because Weinstein fulfils the stereotypical role of a fat grotesquely ugly big-nosed Jew who takes your Gentile women away to abuse, he is now being pilloried and expelled from Hollywood,” one of Weinstein’s friends revealed on Wednesday.

So why now? It begs the question, because Weinstein was tolerated for his behaviour for thirty years, but only now has he been truly publicly exposed.

 

Even though she knew, Meryl Streep called Weinstein “god”, a few years ago, then only backtracked when the façade had broken across the whole media.

Michael Obama praised Weinstein as a “wonderful human being, a good friend, and just a powerhouse” whilst probably knowing about his reputation as a sexual molester and corrupt individual.

Since the horrific persecution of European Jews in WW2, there has been a terrific recovery across the world over 90 years later, and today Jewish people are hugely successful across pretty much every sector one can think of, but this should not lead to complacency and abuse of power.

We asked social analyst, Giles McBain, about the sudden shift in attitude towards Harvey Weinstein especially regarding anti-semitism.

“The reason Harvey Weinstein was protected for all those years, was precisely because he was Jewish. People were scared, not only for their jobs, but if they said anything they would be called anti-semitic. It is forbidden these days to say anything against prominent Jews, especially in the entertainment business. It comes down to the saying: “To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise”. So what precipitated the fall for this monstrous sexual predator? Well, it’s not anti-semitism when your fellow Jews have enough of your antics. Especially when Weinstein was haemorrhaging company money on shutting women up payoffs and losing large sums on failed film projects. You see he was tolerated when he was making the hits, but when that dried up, he was thrown to the dogs, by his own kind. That’s not anti-semitism, it’s just Hollywood money politics.”

Now, there’s just a free-for-all, as Weinstein is persona non grata pretty much everywhere, even amongst his own kind. They washed their hands of him.

Some rumours now doing the circuit allude to Weinstein escaping to Europe a la Polanski, another Jewish Hollywoodite who was expelled for pretty much the same reason. In Europe, Weinstein could still follow his pursuit of young girls but would most probably have to pay large sums of money to keep that sort of lifestyle.

The most probable outcome is that he will get away with everything with some very good lawyers, and be back in Hollywood within five years or less.

Book Review: Mr Trump Goes to Washington

If you want to read something that may give you a little chuckle here or there, how about a satirical review of Mr Trump’s election campaign, and his early days in office?

As far as the much maligned presidency of Donald Trump goes, there is much to be said of his rhetoric versus his action. Here is a guy who said he would ban all Muslims from entering the U.S., yet spectacularly backtracked on his promise. Here is a guy that said he would repeal Obamacare, but could not even get close to doing so; here is a guy who said he would build a wall along the Mexican border, but has not mentioned it since. All in all, Mr Trump has been pretty ineffectual — almost akin to a dog that has a large bark but no bite.

Naturally the liberals are out to get Mr Trump at all costs, and it seems many Republicans are too. This is where we come to the little graphic satirical book capturing the first days of Mr Trump’s presidency by Michael Mayor.

Almost like some kind of deranged Mr Men parody or is it Trumpton, we have Mr Trump Goes to Washington, published by Veloce. Each page turned depicts the president in fine graphical 3D tones with an especially elongated red tie, to accentuate the Don and his insane mission. The jokes come quick and fast, and will soon have you reaching for the toilet paper to wipe your pooey bottom. Yes, this book is good toilet reading.

As with most graphical tomes, this book will have you coming back for more chuckles time after time, just flick to any page to see the antics of Mr Trump unfurl.

Sadly there were no mentions of Mr Trump’s penchant for golden showers performed by beautiful Russian Natasha spies on the FSB payroll who also film the glorious proceedings, possibly to be used at a later date, when Putin needs a little laugh himself.

Yes, it’s a pretty harmless jovial take on Mr Trump and his journey, taking in scenes of Ivanka, the Russians, FAKE NEWS, Hillary, Obama and many, many more.

Hollywood Latest: New Weinstein Movie Starring Pitt, Paltrow and Jolie

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“We’re getting Brad Pitt to play Harvey Weinstein. We also strong armed some famous actresses who profited from Harvey’s Midas touch to accelerate their careers to join the picture — although they deny anything happened way back when,” senior producer, Joel Steinberger said to LA Weekly.

As for the film’s plot and location, it has been revealed that it will revolve around multiple hotel locations around Beverly Hills and the greater Los Angeles area.

Emancipating female actresses

“We go from one hotel room to another. Plenty of massage oil, scripts, contracts and a lot of towels to mop up all the white goo. Weinstein will be portrayed as a champion to female actresses everywhere by emancipating them with his spilled seed,” Steinberger added.

The feel-good movie will reveal how Weinstein embraced women’s rights and feminism by supporting young actresses everywhere.

Contractual lubrication

“In the morning’s he would have two or three, then by the afternoon he would help four or five more actresses extend their careers. We’re thinking of calling the movie Fish Finger, ya know like Gold Finger, but this time with fishy fingers. Believe you me he had to dig deep for that one,” screenwriter Abel Cohen revealed.

Touted as the real deal story of Hollywood, the film will ejaculate onto screens and pot plants across America very soon.

The new film’s release if shooting goes well should be around Summer 2018. (lawsuits abiding)

American Socialists Still Confused How Their Favourite Fundraiser Uncovered As Alleged ‘Vile Lecherous Abuser of Women’

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These are confusing times for American socialists, especially when a key fundraiser for Obama and Hillary Clinton is revealed to be a lecherous abuser of young women and not the fawning male feminist supporter of women’s rights he made out himself to be.

Imagine the shock on their faces as they are regaled by stories of Weinstein masturbating in front of pretty female reporters then unloading his junk into a pot plant after she rejected his advances — here is Harvey Weinstein, a champion of women, a gender-equality apostle, a change agent who knew the progressive socialist liberal agenda.

The reason scumbags like Weinstein can get away with what they do for years is because they pretend to be liberal nice-folk, as well as wielding massive amounts of power in the film industry. Sure, Harvey Weinstein looks like a fat sweating maggot, but he can have any fawning starlet in the room if he wishes because he can get these starlets a place in the lights, you know the spotlights and red carpets. Blow this fat sweating malevolent movie mogul, and they get their careers a major boost, but they gotta swallow and do it right, no cum dodging.

Here was a guy who attended Planned Parenthood galas. He co-hosted lavish fundraisers for Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Weinstein helped fund the Gloria Steinem Endowed Chair in Media, Culture and Feminist Studies at Rutgers. All the while, he was getting young ladies who wanted to be top actresses to go down on him, promising them the world whilst on the other hand paying off other women who wanted to sue him for sexual abuse.

Weinstein should have just been honest with his intentions, I mean who doesn’t want to fuck young beautiful women? If he was honest about it instead of painting himself as some male-feminist champion of women’s socialist rights, he would not be in the trouble he is today.

It is quite hilarious and funny to see these pompous social justice warrior snowflake ‘progressive’ chipmunks now eating their words, as lie after lie is exposed, and abuse after abuse is catalogued for the daily papers.

The American socialist liberals are hypocrites, and have abused their power for far too long, hopefully they take some time to realise what they have turned into, and reflect on their descent into lies.

Blade Runner 2049 the Biggest Turd Sequel of All Time

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The original Shaw Brothers/Ladd co. Blade Runner was a ground breaking monolith of a film from the year 1982, when nothing of this sort had ever been seen before; it transcended all barriers, its technological leaps within the science fiction genre were a world apart from anything ever envisioned before. The Jordan Cronenweth cinematography was magnificent, the atmospheric Vangelis soundtrack so to the point, the Scott direction perfect, and the casting fitted into every scene, every cell of that created a Philip K. Dick world that was truly believable.

The sequel, breaks no ground, it just shows a very basic outline of what could have been, and is such a wasted opportunity that Ridley Scott must have been seriously fucked in the head to have anything to so with this pap, where everything is explained to the audience without any pathos, mystery or suspense. Pity poor Hans Zimmer, who had nothing to play off, just the same old scenes rehashed one after another.

The paid media critics who were bundled handsome amounts of money to praise Blade Runner 2049  before the opening to build up hype and say it is the greatest movie ever made, are nothing but soulless unimaginative whores who have sold off a donkey to the unsuspecting audience for a tidy profit.

To see noob Ryan Gosling walking around abandoned cities for minutes on end, and director Denis Villeneuve’s pathetic pallid bland scenes is an insult to any Blade Runner fan. The whole thing is also a major insult to originator Philip K. Dick who would vomit at the soulless delivery of the replicant story line. You can tell Harrison Ford is only doing this for a great pay off, and he just rambles through the crap scenes for the pay cheque.

 

Sure, there are some interesting technological touches but it has not moved far enough from 1982. Technologically speaking, the world of 2049 is still entrenched in the past, albeit with little mentions of transhumanism and robots.

Everything should not have to be explained to the audience. Where is the pathos? Where are the unanswered questions? The linear movement is so predictable that the whole plot of the film can be discerned within the first few minutes.

Whatever it cost to make this film, it looks low-budget. Most of the budget presumably went in to hiring Harrison Ford.

Shit dialogue, shit visuals, dumb CGI attempt to reproduce Sean Young a la Rogue One, shit story line, predictable and boring. All in all a huge fucking disappointment.

Don’t bother paying for this atrocity, just catch it on any internet streaming site coming out of China and Russia through VPN or a proxy.

Hollywood Casting Couch Latest : Weinstein ‘Gulp Fiction’ Movie

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In Hollywood, if you’re a pig ugly sweating maggot, you’ll go far as long as you’re on top of the producer game, but if you falter, one time too many, the knives soon come out to play.

It’s no news that Harvey Weinstein’s only way to get laid is by  making big promises and getting special favours from the little starlets who will do anything to get (a head), just look at this guy, he looks like Jabba the Hut’s unshaven schmuck uncle on coke.

What are people surprised that someone like this has been getting those young ladies to gently take out their bubble gum, put it to one side, then drop down on their knees for that boost either up the corporate ladder, or the actresses revolving doorway?

This is Hollywood, and the NYT, are opening a hornets nest here. Especially when you have the likes of Polanski, Cosby and Bill Clinton still worshipped by the scene despite their record.

Weinstein will be back, he just needs to be more careful next time when making promises, like if it suddenly doesn’t turn out for the women, they always get that pang of new-found feminist conscience and start snitching. If she however moves up the ladder, then all is forgotten — including feminism, and talking to the papers.

That’s just the way it is…