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We Tried to Interview Theresa May About Her Draft EU Deal

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As the Daily Squib’s political correspondent, I was privileged to be given access to Theresa May at Number 10, Downing Street.

This is a time of great crisis for the Prime Minister, who is trying to sell her ‘Brexit’ deal to the parliament and country.

DS: Prime minister May, thank you kindly for granting us access, especially in this time of turmoil and political chaos.

TM: I am firmly committed to conducting the Brexit the people voted for, to take the UK out of the customs union, to control migration, to take the UK out of the Common Agricultural Policy, to take the UK out of the EU fisheries policy and to take back control.

DS: How can we get out of the customs union when there is a clause tying the UK to the EU permanently? Even your attorney general, Geoffrey Cox, warned you and the cabinet that this will be nigh on impossible to get out of, and even if the UK tries to get out of it, it will take decades of lawyers working day and night at huge cost to the country. Not only that, you have conceded to pay the EU £39 billion for the pleasure of imprisonment and nothing else to show for it.

TM: I am firmly committed to conducting the Brexit the people voted for, to take the UK out of the customs union, to control migration, to take the UK out of the Common Agricultural Policy, to take the UK out of the EU fisheries policy and to take back control.

DS. Do you think it was right for a Remainer to try to conduct a Brexit? Most of the Cabinet are Remainers, and most of the civil service, Treasury and Bank of England. Your deal looks like it is a remain document as opposed to a Brexit document. In other words, everything is geared towards appeasing the EU with massive capitulations making the UK into a vassal state with no say or get out clause.

TM: I am firmly committed to conducting the Brexit the people voted for, to take the UK out of the customs union, to control migration, to take the UK out of the Common Agricultural Policy, to take the UK out of the EU fisheries policy and to take back control.

DS: How do you respond to the mass ministerial resignations from the party and your cabinet in protest at the deal you have presented?

TM: I am firmly committed to conducting the Brexit the people voted for, to take the UK out of the customs union, to control migration, to take the UK out of the Common Agricultural Policy, to take the UK out of the EU fisheries policy and to take back control.

DS: You keep saying that but the document says otherwise. Why do you say one thing when you are presenting something completely different? This document keeps the UK tied to the EU indefinitely. Why are you lying? Are you going to give a free vote on this draft to parliament Mrs May? Please answer the questions, Mrs May.

TM: I am firmly committed to conducting the Brexit the people voted for, to take the UK out of the customs union, to control migration, to take the UK out of the Common Agricultural Policy, to take the UK out of the EU fisheries policy and to take back control (frothing at the mouth).

DS: Are you okay Mrs. May (concerned)?

TM: Error syntax error (zzzzzst) compilation error (sparks flying) Trying to reboot (tsssssssszzzk) run time error (smoke coming from ears) logic overload motherboard error! (zzzzzst) shut down! shut down!

Number 10 technicians in white coats immediately rush in with an assortment of screwdrivers, pliers and cranks. They try to repair Mrs May, who at one point tries dancing but her leg falls off.

I bid my farewell, and flee Downing Street, traumatised by what I have witnessed.

BRINO Latest: Theresa May Appoints Remain Minister

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BRINO PM Theresa May has appointed a Remain minister to be in charge of remaining in the EU.

“I have dispensed with Brexit ministers, that’s two of them to be precise. Instead of a Brexit minister, I have decided to appoint a Remain minister, because it falls more in line with my BRINO Chequers deal. No, I will not take anymore comments thank you,” the PM hurriedly announced this morning.

What will the Remain minister’s duties involve?

Olly Robbins, kindly explained the role of the Remain minister to waiting press outside Number 10 Downing Street.

“As chief Remain operative, we had no qualms about ignoring our previous Brexit ministers, so we are dispensing with the whole Brexit thing anyway due to our remain stance and the cleverly worded dossier we presented to the people that explains why we will remain in the EU. Brexit actually means Remain. Just thought I might reiterate that point. For every step out of the EU, we are assuring the UK makes four steps back into the EU.”

The Remain Minister, Jean Claude Juncker, will start work immediately, first by simply reading Theresa May’s BRINO deal and explaining to reporters why leaving the EU means remaining in the EU.

Perpetually Offended Person Offended by the Concept of Being Offended

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Perpetually offended Social Justice Warrior, and keen activist in all socialist matters, ranging from LGBTQP affairs, feminism, no borders, soviet ideology, marxism, and the ideal communist state, Hugh Mungus, is in a state of perpetual offence.

“I wake up in the morning and the first thing I hear are the words, ‘good morning’ and I shout to my roommate that this is a form of racist linguistic capitalist imperialist sexist white-male created offensive greeting that assumes it is a good morning in our Western capitalist bourgeois society when there are people in Africa NOT having a good morning. They are having a shit morning because they live in a corrugated iron shack and have to walk for five hours to fill a bucket full of dirty muddy water to fucking drink from.”

Mr. Mungus, who attends Berkeley college in California is so outraged that he now deems all society, biology and science offensive as well as the concept of being offended as offensive.

“I am outraged and offended at offence. It is offensive and hateful to be in this perpetual state and the concept of being offended is offending. Being offended in itself is an offensive stance to the state of offence and offending. Being offended is no doubt in my mind a creation of the capitalist racist sexist system which imprisons people to be offended and I suspect they created offence in the first place. Everything is offensive to me, as I am perpetually in a state of offence and it is my right to be offended at the concept of being offended and offence in an offensive manner.”

 

Theresa May Opts to Stay on Sinking S.S.BRINO Ship

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Thar she goes..the leaky ship BRINO is sinking fast, with resignations galore, some have jumped into the lifeboats, Northern Island minister, 2 x Brexit ministers, BoJo, Esther McVey plus all the rest.

Mrs May is sticking to her guns though on her ship called BRINO. As each gloating EU iceberg slams into the side, she stays stalwart and says everything is okay.

 

“There is nothing to see here. There is no danger. The ship BRINO may be taking on gallons of freezing water through the torn hull, the violins are still playing, and I am still dancing on the deck, even though we are now lopping port side at 35 degrees.”

As for the crew of the ship that are still onboard BRINO, they are vehemently promised by Captain May that there is nothing to fear, and that everything is fine.

“Mrs May told us that it’s ok and even though I am now hanging from a flagpole and the ship is making these rather unsavoury gurgling noises as the water is pushing through, I am committed to believing Captain May that there is nothing to worry about..Aaaaargh! (falls 200 feet to their death)”

This time however, there will be no Celine Dion soundtrack.

Perpetual 48 Hrs For Stage Managed BRINO Deal Never Coming Soon

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Today we have another announcement that the Brexit deal will be completed in the next 48 hrs, much like the previous 48 hrs, and the 48 hrs before that.

David Lidington, the Cabinet Office minister, must be so bored of having to announce a deal being made every 48 hrs for the last few months.

“I get the call from Olly Robbins, to make another 48 hrs announcement, then after another 48 hrs passes, I get another call to do the same thing. Frankly, I’m getting rather bored of it. This BRINO stage managed fiasco really is smarting. I have better things to do.”

Of course, we all know the plan is one of stalling things for as long as possible, in order to push the “Brexit In Name Only” Chequers deal through parliament as a matter of urgency towards the end of some deadline made by Brussels. Hopefully the good ol’ boys and gals will be there to vote the fucker down as soon as it finally rears its ugly head.

Coincidentally 48 hrs was a great movie from 1982 starring Nick Nolte, and a young Eddie Murphy.

The bit that really sticks in the memory is the moment Eddie is in his jail cell singing Roxanne by the Police. This was truly a wonderful cinematic and comedic scene.

Nolte plays a hard edged cop who enlists Murphy, a convict, to find a killer in less than 48 hours, or it’s jail time for Reggie.

At the time, it was a typical cliche black and white buddy movie, with the usual love and hate politics.

Great film. Watch it if you ever missed it or were not born then.

A Clean No Deal Brexit Will Be the Day When Britain Gets Its Guts Back

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Are these not the same Brexit shores that bred men to storm the beaches of Normandy, to fight against hordes of Vikings, to win against all odds against Napoleon, to conquer half of the world with one of the greatest empires ever known?

No Deal Better Than Bad Deal

You would certainly not think it from the Theresa May crew, who shrivel and kowtow to every Brussels belch. Who have constrained Britain and left it a whimpering bitch on the end of a leash.

What did those men and women die for in two world wars? It certainly was not to be a subservient nation unable to make its own laws, unable to make its own trade deals, and unable to GET SOME FUCKING BOLLOCKS!

We voted on June 23, 2016 in a democratic referendum to leave the Customs Union, leave the ECJ, leave the single market, and ultimately leave the EU — COMPLETELY! No half measures, no half foot in half out, none of that.

The EU referendum result was promised that it would be solidly binding and respected by parliament, and not meddled with. This promise was of course made because the Remain side was projected to win. When the result was Leave, this was obviously a different story and democracy flew out of the window.

It seems there is no belief any more in Britain, a land that has much illustrious historic value, and has been the bastion of adversity for thousands of years. We’re not fucking surrender monkeys that roll over like the others, those wet farts who initially disagreed to an EU referendum question, but were ordered by their EU masters to have another one until they got the answer Brussels wanted. (France, Ireland, Netherlands)

Clean No Deal Brexit

Britain’s future will be one of great riches and sovereign greatness, if it leaves without a deal. Its people and parliamentarians can hold their heads up high, and they can forge their own trade deals, they can fish in their own waters, they can make their own laws once again.

We must embrace freedom. Yes, it is going to be tough, but better to live one day as a lion than 100 as a sheep.

We must move forward, clean no deal Brexit. Let the EU twaddle on that one, let them eat their own rotten cake, for it is they who have reneged, back stabbed, and wriggled like worms in the so-called ‘negotiations’.

It is time to stand up. Now!

“Where do we stand? We are not members of the European Defence Community, nor do we intend to be merged in a Federal European system. We feel we have a special relation to both. This can be expressed by prepositions, by the preposition “with” but not “of”—we are with them, but not of them.” Sir Winston Churchill https://api.parliament.uk/historic-hansard/commons/1953/may/11/foreign-affairs

Women and Children Will Be Pushed to Front When Migrant Caravan Reaches US Border

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The technique the organisers of the migrant caravan will utilise to offset any military presence at the U.S. border will be to push the women and children to the front, almost as a human shield, and to also display them to the world’s press who will be filming them.

This method is utilised as a means to shame the military, because they will be facing off to thousands of women and children. This will also engender feelings of sadness amongst viewers and pity.

The Mexican authorities have repeatedly promised the migrant caravan people homes, benefits, schooling and safety, but none of the participants of the caravan have taken up the offer, even though many are claiming they are pursuing safety and asylum. They instead only talk about going to America.

The organisers of the migrant caravan, are funded by many organisations, mostly socialist and communist, inadvertently funded by US taxpayers through shell charity organisations, and those linked to George Soros.

In Guatemala, 11 Cuban nationals were detained, and many in the caravan are from far flung spots like Bangladesh, Congo and other Asian countries.

It is a certainty that the migrant caravan was planned over a year ago. This can be ascertained by the immense logistical operation, where food and rest stops along the route have all been meticulously laid out. Transport, and even payment to the participants of the caravan to continue their journey, some paid over $1,000 each for the trek by leftist groups.

These poor people are effectively pawns of the leftist groups who are manipulating them purely as a political agenda to undermine Donald Trump and America. This despicable act is a human tragedy and the organisations who have been implicit in organising this should have their US affiliates shut down by the Trump organisation and their funds seized.

One cannot be sure of the response by the Trump administration when the migrant caravan hits the border, but if he backs down he will be viewed as weak, if he acts aggressively, then he will cause outrage amongst the leftists and communists within the United States.

This is a very fine tightrope the president now finds himself on. What will he do to get out of this calamity foisted on him and the country? How will all of this end? Could this topple Trump and his bid for 2020 reelection?

Break out the popcorn and Schlitz and keep watching.

Think Tank: Britain Must Invigorate Military Budget and Bring in Compulsory Draft

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Time is running out, according to a global think tank, Strategic Universal Coalition Kraft, who determine that the acceleration of military might in Russia and China is outclassing anything that is happening in the West.

“Russia recently unveiled a hypersonic ‘glider’ called Avangard, active under the Red Banner Missile Division, which is based in the south Urals. This terrifying weapon travels at 20 at times the speed of sound, is invulnerable to any air defences, and can strike a target anywhere on Earth ‘like a meteorite’, according to Vladimir Putin.

“Russia’s ‘Satan II’ missile can carry up to 24 Avangards, which means one fully-loaded nuke would have enough firepower to wipe out all the major cities in the UK in one fell swoop.

“China is developing a satellite system that can spot submarines at a depth of 500 metres which would render most fleets of Western nuclear submarines redundant and traceable.

“Project Guanlan, meaning “watching the big waves”, was officially launched in May at the Pilot National Laboratory for Marine Science and Technology in Qingdao, Shandong. Song Xiaoquan, a researcher involved in the project, said if the team can develop the satellite as planned, it will make the upper layer of the sea “more or less transparent”.

“The device is designed to generate high-power laser beam pulses in different colours, or frequencies, that allow sensitive receivers to pick up more information from various depths. Those laser beams can scan an area as wide as 100km, or concentrate on one spot just 1km wide. It will be used in conjunction with a microwave radar, also mounted on the satellite, to better identify targets. Although the radar cannot penetrate water, it can measure the surface movement with extremely high accuracy – so when a moving submarine creates small disturbances on the surface, the radar will tell the satellite where to throw the laser beam.

“These are just a few examples of a myriad of programmes that have already been developed and are being implemented as well as programmes in current development threatening the UK, and its NATO allies.

“While other nations are spending on military hardware and upgrading their systems, the UK is falling by the side. The Ministry of Defence faces a £15 billion shortfall in its budget for the next ten years, and is barely functioning as of right now.

“The National Audit Office said that the MoD’s equipment plan – used to fund military hardware including combat aircraft and submarines – “remains unaffordable”, with the department itself forecasting a £7bn gap between now and 2028.

“The situation is deteriorating to such a level that the MoD is currently considering whether to pause a raft of big projects under the Modernising Defence Programme launched by ministers earlier this year.

“This disgraceful negligence by current and past governments puts the UK in considerable risk not only now, but in the future. If it does not remedy these gaps in funding, and increase spending immediately, Britain will be a sitting duck in any future conflict.

“Not only should the government increase military spending by at least 60%, it must also implement a national program for all citizens of compulsory military service, healthy males 17 to 21 years old will serve in the armed forces for 18 months. Compulsory conscription during peace time is a necessary preparation for future conflict coming soon.

“The UK, must also expand its military preparations and increase cooperation with its allies, as they will be needed to bolster our defences when the conflict begins.

“The UK must increase its army of hackers, because the conflict will most probably start with a massive cyber attack, which will seek to shut down Britain’s infrastructure, power, water, and transport. GCHQ must receive an increase of funding that will enable it to counteract an immense coordinated cyber attack.

“If nothing is done now, it will be too late when the conflict commences. There will be little or no time to react with any purposeful force.”

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http://www.royalnavy.mod.uk/careers/how-to-join

https://www.raf.mod.uk/recruitment/

http://www.army.mod.uk/specialforces/30603.aspx

http://www.army.mod.uk/intelligence/intelligence.aspx

About the British Economy and its Tax Advantages

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The United Kingdom is the world’s fifth-largest economy with a GDP of around € 3 trillion, close to that of France, which ranks sixth in the world.

By 2016, the United Kingdom had the fastest growth among the G7 countries. The World Bank ranks the United Kingdom in seventh place in the Doing Business 2017 ranking.

The United Kingdom is the world’s twelfth destination of foreign direct investment, according to UNCTAD. Moreover, for centuries, London has emerged as the lung of finance and business in Europe, and even in the world.

The United Kingdom’s strategy is to attract foreign investors from all over the world, mostly in London, through a very attractive tax system.

british economyIndeed, a non-resident who chooses to move to the United Kingdom can be granted non-domiciled status, a very advantageous status from a tax point of view.

During the first seven years, all income generated in offshore, which means outside the United Kingdom, is not taxed! We let you imagine the assemblies and techniques possible to optimize its income and its offshore business…

Regarding their currency, despite recent devaluations, the British Pound remains a strong and stable currency.

The United Kingdom is home to Europe’s leading stock market, the London Stock Exchange. Its influence stems from the diversity of its financial activities and its ability to innovate.

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Horse Tips for Throughout the Week

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It’s easier than ever to make your own horse racing tips with the selection of races being covered by bookmaker websites and apps. Most passionate sports fans will choose to bet on what they’re predicting with hopes of making a profit. Regardless of which sport you prefer to bet on, it’s hard to ignore horse racing with it being recognised as one of the most popular betting sports.

Most horse tips are built on either backing a horse to win or to place, with each variation having its own pros and cons that need to be assessed before staking any of your own money. By backing to win, you’ll be able to take the strongest price from your chosen horse winning. Getting behind a horse to place assures a smaller amount of returns if your horse finishes in the top few places of the race, guaranteeing something even if your horse is unable to win outright.

By following a few simple rules, you’ll be able to heighten your bet’s chances of winning. It’s worth taking these extra steps before offering out any of your own horse tips as it will not only strengthen your bet but also potentially increase the winnings you could get if the bet lands in your favour.

Finding horse tips to bet on

The internet is packed full of places where you’ll find reliable horse racing tips. All of the good ones are picked in a way that makes use of statistics and form rather than randomly picking nags at random, and they’re all free horse tips, so it’s hard to not at least shop around before placing a bet on the sport. You need to be careful when looking at these horse racing betting websites, as not all of them put in the effort they should to provide visitors with worthwhile bets, but it’s easy to pick out a good one based on their track record and following.

You’re able to make just as strong horse tips if you put in the same effort as experienced betting websites. All you need to do is look into the horse you’re considering betting on, checking how capable they are in winning the race you’re backing them to finish first in. Another factor is how capable other horses in the race are, especially in the instance where it turns out that there’s another horse that holds a stronger record in the type of race you’re placing money on.