17.7 C
London
Friday, December 5, 2025
secret satire society
HomeWorldScared For Security Harry and Meghan to Stay at Wormwood Scrubs During...

Scared For Security Harry and Meghan to Stay at Wormwood Scrubs During UK Visit

LONDON - England - Despised and hated Meghan Markle and Harry are scared for their security when visiting the UK. This is why they have been offered a place at Wormwood Scrubs prison.

ai

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have decided upon a place to stay during their time in the UK for the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee, a report has claimed.

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex will be travelling from their 16-bathroom McMansion in California to hog the limelight from the monarch’s historic 70-year reign celebrations. Ovid Scoobie, spokesperson for Meghan, 40, and Harry, 37, said they were “excited about using the Queen’s Platinum celebrations to capitalise on their upcoming Netflix series” and maybe dish out some more dirt about the royals.

After confirming their return to the UK, speculation has been high about where the couple will stay during their visit.

prison cellThe source reveals the couple plan to stay at Wormwood Scrubs prison in a special cell due to “security issues”.

The outlet reported that “heightened security measures” are already being implemented ahead of their arrival because the couple are hated so much in Britain.

Prison warden, Malcolm Dozier, was keen to welcome the disgraced former royal prince and his actress wife.

“For their own security, we will put them in a cell for twenty-four hours a day and feed them the same foul prison food other prisoners receive. We just don’t have the budget to go out on a limb for these grifters. The Netflix film crew of 45 will also be housed in our prison. I have heard Markle is a parasitical grifting vermin, therefore she will appreciate the rats, cockroaches and assorted creatures lurking in the dark, cold, damp cells.”

The good thing is, Harry and Meghan will not have to pay a penny for their security. It will all be at Her Majesty’s Pleasure…

 

  Do you value freedom?

  SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee. DUE TO THE NATURE OF OUR JUVENALIAN SATIRE WE CAN ONLY SURVIVE BY DONATIONS. PLEASE CONSIDER DONATING. THANK YOU.
ai
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

ai

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!