No Curry For Greta Thunberg

NEW DELHI - India - Eco activist, Greta Thunberg has caused a bit of a storm amongst patriotic Indians, and is now out of curry.

greta curries
Greta Thunberg loves curries from all of India's regions

Looks like it’s back to Swedish meatballs for Greta Thunberg as a good Indian curry is out of the window.

Millions of Indians are rather pissed off with the darling Swedish eco icon activist Greta Thunberg.

“Even if we find out she order takeaway curry we will have line of people in the kitchens waiting to hock a load in her Rogan Josh or Tikka Massala. Yes, some will do a pee pee in there maybe, or put some pubic hairs in there, or pick their nose adding it to the curry. One nice gentleman said he would even wipe his arse with her chapati,” a curry restaurant chef in Stockholm, Sweden revealed.

Indians are deeply patriotic about their nation, and to see the likes of Greta Thunberg meddling in their country makes them very angry.

“Why does she not meddle in China? That country is the most polluting shit hole in the world with an appalling human rights record?” another angry proud Indian shouted at a demonstration in New Delhi on Friday.

Such is the vitriol, that Thunberg’s handlers are trying not to reveal that Greta is in fact a curry enthusiast, and will be profoundly hurt by avoiding her favourite Indian dishes.

“Greta is a curry enthusiast, she knows dishes from Punjab to Gujarat, and especially loves Goan delicacies from the Kerala region, beautiful fragrant fish curries spiced with Kashmiri chillis, marinated with ingredients like coconut and tamarind, exquisitely tasty! It is a far cry from a few plain boiled potatoes and dry meatballs that taste like cardboard from the Ikea restaurant.”