17.7 C
London
Wednesday, April 24, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldObama Thanks Ku Klux Klan for Election Support

Obama Thanks Ku Klux Klan for Election Support

CHICAGO - USA - White supremacists across America have been rejoicing at the news that Barack Hussein Obama is to be the next president of the United States of America.

The Obama campaign slogan of ‘Time for Change’ has never been so relevant as now. The people have spoken, thanks to George W Bush’s disastrous tenure as chief monkey, even the white supremacists were with Obama.

“We, the KKK, voted for and funded Obama for a reason, it really is a time for change. We’re throwing down our arms folks and instead of guns we want to extend a hand of friendship to every negro in the United States. We also want to say sorry for being such shits in the past and hope y’all can forgive us,” Cletus Monroe told the Daily Squib.

The Daily Squib famously reported back in February 2008 that the Ku Klux Klan endorsed Obama.

“Who’s the massa now?”

Obama now presides over his subjects with the absolute power that has been interned upon his magisterial self by the people.

“It was a joy to see Klan faces amongst voters in Kentucky on Tuesday, all over the nation the queues were filled with blacks and whites making sure they voted for Obama. Our Klan office worked tirelessly in our efforts and we were even reminding people with texts on their cell phones to vote for our great leader,” Mr Monroe added.

The new message of love and peace brought by the Ku Klux Klan also extends to all other nationalities in the USA. There have been messages of love extended to Mexicans and other people of colour as well as Chinese people.

How America has changed – It was only up until 1978 that black people had
to drink from different water fountains in public

Obama supporters last night, on hearing of his inevitable victory, thanked the Klan for “finally coming round” and “embracing humanity and Jesus.”

Never before has such unity been seen in America. There is a distinct belief that Obama may even be the ‘second coming’ and the new messiah.

‘No Mo’ Cracker’

Barack Obama’s address last night brought out much emotion in the assembled crowds and those watching on their screens:

“The whip that used to crack on the African slaves in the plantation fields of the South have truly been silenced. A new dawn and age of change has come across the land, everything else is Gone With the Wind. I want to thank all of those who supported my campaign, and especially the Ku Klux Klan. Thank you for endorsing me all the way and without your huge contribution we would have certainly lost. I would also like to thank the Daily Squib newspaper for their great coverage on the whole campaign as well as your wonderfully factual and accurate reportage which has frankly revolutionized journalism and all media. I want to also thank Michelle my wife and all our children as well as all the campaigners who worked tirelessly for many many hours. God is great.”

The world is now about to enter a new dawn of collectivised ownership, a world of total globalisation and a commune for all.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"

19 COMMENTS

  1. sooo what obama has links with freemasonary. he hates Jesus.

    he wants to do everything against catholics he can.
    kkk will alway be anti-Catholic D:

  2. OKAAAAAAAAAY. That is a little bit weird…don’t you think? For hundreds of years–well since the KKK came to light, they were SUPREME RACISTS. So I don’t believe that just like that, the KKK decided to support Obama. I mean, SERIOUSLY. That is too scary. Hey, don’t you think something weird is happening? I mean, this is the Ku Klux Klan we’re talking about! They exist to hate other races. And so just because; Obama became President–just like that the KKK will cease from existing. I almost laughed when the KKK even funded Obama’s campaign. Nothing funny but like WOWWWW! Someone should investigate the Ku Klux Klan!
    And what is all these stuff I am reading? about christian women

  3. i have never been so proud to be an American as i am today.
    President Obama is going to save this country and i am so grateful for all the wonderful, smart, courageous people who voted for his this November.
    As for the ones who did not vote for him because of his skin color:
    i feel sorry for your ignorance but it is time to wake up!
    We the People of the United States of America have spoken and we say, YES WE CAN!!!

    • Six years later I would venture to say you are probably not that happy anymore. He has left us with a whole bunch of “crappy change” but “no real hope” from his administration. Fortunatly the republicans now hold the majoraty in The Legislative Branch…

  4. Sou brasileiro, sou negro, esse racismo e preconceito contra os negros prova o quanto eles temen a nossa superioridade em relacao a eles pois somos melhores em tudo que fazemos, por isso nunca nos deixaram chegar ao poder, agora com Barak Obama tudo vai mudar, agora me diga, O QUE E KU KLUX KLAN???

  5. This is and will always be a WHITE mans world good luck to that Ni**er taking my weapons it wont happen so to all you Ni**ers out there suck my D**k

  6. Obama is going to do something in his first 30 days in office that he promised the KKK. He’s going to steal money from people to pay to abort black babies. Under Obama Blacks will kill more of their children than any president in history. He’s going to make it so they don’t have to tell their parents, and he’ll give them a stimulus check to pay for it. Margret Sanger was a eugenics scientist, and white supremacist, and she created Planned Baron-hood. She placed them in the inner cities to get rid of what she termed a drain on society. Ask yourself why the black population has stagnated around 12% while screwing like rabbits? Why are they all told that children cost millions to

  7. Obama is going to outlaw the KKK that’s what i heard people..he’s going to outlaw the KKK so it will be illegal to say anyhting bad against any ni**ers!!!!

  8. America is centuries ahead – America has proved to the rest of the world that they are centuries ahead , The greatness of your country is in your ability to transform and move on , to see a white supremascist group such as KKK Endorse a Black president is totally unheard of in other so called advamced societies – All you to do now is to stop the name calling and hate messages and move on as one nation – May God continue to bless America

  9. Barack Hussein Obama’s Connections to the Nation of Islam:

    His father was Islamic, and his mother was a lover of Islam. She even married another Muslim man after Obama’s blood father died. That little lady is ADDICTED to dark Muslim penis.
    He was born in Hawaii, which is still (to many True Christiansâ„¢) a foreign country with questionable leanings. Creation Scientists classify Hawaii as: Japanese Miami.
    He spent most of his youth in Muslim countries and received his early education in schools run by the Nation of Islam. As True Christiansâ„¢ we believe that everything you really ever need to learn is taught in kindergarten – and in Obama’s case – this fact should send shivers down

  10. Friends,

    all of you need to know that Jesus is Lord. Him and Him alone. He is the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. And He is returning to purge the earth of all the hatred that is simmering on this website. I want to warn and encourage all of you who read this that He Loves you but he does not want you to die in your hatred, clinging to the systems and agendas of this world. His kingdom is not of this world. This is a call to repentance friends. Turn your anger and hatred over to Him and let Him fill your hearts with his love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self control.
    And allow Him to tame your tongues and heal your hearts of all the offenses and

  11. The American Civil War is over. If you are a member of the KKK or just a white racist time to throw in the towel you’ve lost it’s over. For a long time the black people in America have had to put up with your shit not anymore. What kind of man hides behind a sheet anyway not to mention the racist white supremest groups who hide behind the internet and according to Fox News the ex-wife of former KKK leader David Duke, is now married to Don Black, the creator of the white-power hate site Stormfront. Chloe Black is currently employed as an executive assistant at Florida Crystals, a sugar conglomerate whose owners, the Fanjul brothers, have donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to help

  12. Hey everyone! please make sure you don’t choke on your words as you swallow them! It now seems that Obama has overcome the odds to become your president (which you must acknowledge no matter how much you hate the man!).
    I’d like to offer you a special invitation…to the 21st century. Forget these absurd ideas about whites being superior to blacks or anyone else for that matter. I’m surprised that you would say such a thing and claim to be educated. The fact is…ignorance is color-blind.
    Incidentally, have you noticed my flawless spelling and wonderful delivery? I’m black, from (of all places) Kenya!
    For those of you that want to throttle me just about now, here is some advice: make

  13. We just hanged over the keys to the country. This place is going to go to shit. I suggest you get a sand box for your lawn so that the towel heads feel at home when they move in.

  14. White people are blamed for racism in this country. There is nothing more prejudiced than a N***** with an attitude. The entries on this site made by the foul mouthed UNEDUCATED black people show just how shallow they are. Slavery has been over for hundreds of years and they still blame the white people for their failure. It is never mentioned some of the slaves wanted to stay on with their masters after the law of freedom was passed. The blacks talk about how badly treated they are. What is their excuse for SCREAMING at their little children, telling them to SHUT THEIR d*** mouth and physically abusing these little children? They treat their children terrible in public. It has been seen time after time. And if you BLACKS will notice, you are the PROBLEM in this country. You would have NOTHING if it weren’t for hard working white people. Your destiny in life is determined by your own decisions. And let me tell you one more thing. You worked in the FRESH air outside and had your OWN

  15. Americas Civil War is Over The beginning of WW III – We are fighting overseas to liberate women so they have a voice here in the U.S. the racist group KKK endorses a Ni**er to represent them over one of their own breed who gender is female. My take on the real reason why the KKK endorsed President Obama is the KKK is SCARED STRAIGHT they realize their white Former President George Bush screwed up BIG TIME with the rest of the international world with deception and lies plus the Muslim people will not answer to a woman skin color doesn’t matter. The KKK is trying to be slick knowing our enemy hates them solely because they are white americans they know the war is personal because of George Bush’s lies which has been expressed on numerous occasions and the BLACK AMERICANS have nothing to do with it. The KKK wants President Obama to be their Guinnipig to mend Americas relationship on the international scene because at this point no one from the white race especially Klan would be able to resolve the international problems.reminds me of when JESUS told the people Let the who has not sinned cast the first stone. Believe me people we are living proof of the bible those that were oppressed have rose up to power I would personally like to thank the KKK for the first and last time ever with out yall we couldn’t got so many of those racist electorial ticket votes. I hope Obama set asside the money the KKK gave him to help fund manpower and sanctions which will shut the KKK down permanently arrest its members take away their illegally accumilated(LONG MONEY) riches and homes give away to poor people who really need and desirve it.

  16. You have lost your nation to a Muslim!

    There is only one thing left for you; Surrender or be annihilated!!!!!

    I am Muslim and I Love your white Christian women they are so good, that is sexually and although they are but mere sexual creatures, the wild animal passion they possess satisfies all Muslim men. Although they are nothing in caparison to delicate Perl of a Muslim woman; I guess we still have a place for them in the Harem. I not a Muslim man when I F**K White Women; they are sooooooo..oo good. Thank you Jesus!!!!!

  17. Wake up America!

    Why are White Christians, whose forefathers founded this nation losing their identity, culture, values and now their beloved USA?

    It should come as no big surprise that this nation would fall; the whites Christians will have no rights, no liberties and no freedom. This is only the start of a beginning that will see your democracy falter. You are not the superior race!!!!!

    Barak Obama (real name: Abdul Barak Hussein Osama Sheik) is our first step in gaining power of your nation using your own system of democracy. I must say this has really worked well for us. His eloquence of speaking will revolutionize this nation in to an Islamic state; your schools will be made in to Islamic madras’s, your declaration of impendence will be replaced with the Quran, your legal system with Sharia Law.

    Your so called freedoms that you have enjoyed for so long have blinded you in the coming of this day. You White Christians are a lost people in the wilderness of your own making. Your democracy, capitalism, consumerism, Imperialism has only worked to make your nation a haven for peoples of other races, cultures, faiths and identities. You are a lost and broken people today. Every White Christian should be ashamed of them selves, as today your forefathers will be resting uneasy in their graves. Your stupidity and greed has surrendered your very existence.

    So now you have a choice….submit to our will or you will be annihilated. We are now the new Masters, you are mere puppets. Your forefathers gave the ultimate sacrifice their blood to build this nation, your beloved USA. You White Christians have no pride and now it seems no power. GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »