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Wednesday, May 12, 2021
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Austere Europeans Moving to Africa

LILONGWE - Malawi - Rufus Brantnimes used to live in Paris enjoying all the trappings of wealth, but since the EU's austerity drive he lost everything. Today he lives in Africa and says he has never been happier.

Africans Refusing Clothing From America

KINSHASA - Congo - Another shipment of unwanted second-hand clothes has arrived from America at Le Beach Ngobila port this week much to the disappointment of the Congolese people.

Police Warn About ‘Jenkem’ the New Legal High

LONDON - England - Just hours after the ban on 'miaow miaow' mephedrone came into force, officers are on the alert for yet another party drug called 'Jenkem' which is now taking the UK by storm.

Mugabe Surprised to Win Election Again

HARARE - Zimbabwe - Robert Mugabe has been taken aback at the vote tally after a close election contest after being pleasantly surprised to have won by such a massive landslide.

Brown Congratulates Mugabe for Winning Election

NEW YORK - USA - Unelected British leader Gordon Brown congratulated Robert Mugabe on winning re-election in Zimbabwe after losing the peoples vote in the recent election.

African Village Empty After Mass Celebrity Adoptions

UGANDA - Ondongo Tamba is the only person left in the village of Kkonkoma after a mass of celebrity adoptions.

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