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America’s Guns: Obama Cried People Died

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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America’s Guns: Obama Cried People Died

Some guy was recorded whilst waiting for a bagel at a coffee shop in downtown Lafayette.

“When Obama cried on the podium yesterday, I cried too, all those people shooting themselves and each other with guns, like it really hit home.

“What do Obama’s tears mean to you? Do you wanna put the guns down yet? You don’t need that Kalashnikov, the horror of the shootings daily in your hood, and the depopulation that is happening around us. Did you know that every minute in the United States, 43 gun murders take place.

“You could be anywhere, a school, a cinema, a restaurant or in the park, all it takes is someone with a gun shooting you when you least expect it.

“It’s all so horrific. What are you gonna do? So please Americans, we need to do this now, the Second Amendment just needs to be adjusted slightly, and don’t you dare even read Infowars as they’re just stoking the fires of gun violence. Is Alex ‘Provocateur’ Jones part of the system? Damn sure he is, he pays taxes, and his operation is a classic data-mining magnet for unnamed agencies. What better way to find all the kooks by acting like one yourself, Jones is an okay actor, but he’s a well paid actor and he uses specific triggers during his rants to up the ante, make you buy his snake oil and comment on his site. If Jones was really revolutionary, they would have shut him down years ago, the proof is in his rise to power and mega bucks.

“The powers that be know what you are thinking, the cat’s already out of the bag, sure they got caught snooping after Snowden gave it away, but most people already knew anyway.

“Uncle Obama really feels for you, didn’t you see the tears streaming down his face, he was crying like a lil baby? Maybe there was a sick bag backstage but you didn’t see that folks. But seriously, we need to limit guns in America, it’s really getting ridiculous now. All these mass shootings day in day out, doesn’t it get to you? What if it was your kid, or your dad, or your mom?

“Guns are tools for killing, when a person pulls the trigger deadly bullets fly out at high speed. When a bullet hits its target it makes a mess of things. Could be a leg, a liver or a butt, dang don’t wanna get hit in your groin or knee cap, that shit is painful.

“See when you watch an action movie, those guys are shooting blanks, it’s not real, in reality when someone gets shot whether they live or die, whatever, you just shot someone, that’s not right.

“Sure you’re going to say self defence, you need guns for protection, but if no one had guns but the people in charge, you wouldn’t need a gun. Best policy in a fight is calmness, just walk away it ain’t worth it or call the police. The cops have guns to Protect and Serve, like that’s what it says on the badge, and all you have to do is dial 911 and they’ll come and protect you from whatever is going on.

“Next you’re going to say guns are a protection of the citizen to tyranny from the state. Well, this can be fixed in one moment, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. Become a Senator or legislator or something to do with a government office, because any person will tell ya, it’s nigh on impossible to beat the system now. Even if every American had a gun and started shooting right now, the state, the army, the whatever would put a stop to that in less than a week. They have the logistics, the equipment, the bullets, the frickin’ air force, and make the laws. What have you got? It’s all too big to beat, especially when an A10 Warthog opens up a can o’ whoop ass on you with its Gatling gun. The NSA already knows who to get first, they’d put a stop to any movement within a few days.

“Some militia boys in Oregon are making a stand right now, and there are militia all across the U.S. but they don’t have a chance in hell for two reasons, the first being, they have limited numbers and the second, they are surrounded from all sides including the air. What are they going to do? Absolutely nothing, because the majority of Americans want peace and the Bundy family, of which there are many strands, hold a long standing heritage in the U.S. but the yokel strand we are seeing in Oregon are only one element, as the Bundy name reaches high up into the top echelons of government.

“I’m going to tell y’all this once, don’t shoot, put down your gun son, because if you don’t, somebody gonna get hurt some.”

What will happen if Americans have guns taken from them?

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Vaginal Speakers Causing Mayhem on Public Transport

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Vaginal Speakers Causing Mayhem on Public Transport

London Underground on a busy Monday rush hour morning, a troupe of pregnant women are in a carriage.

One lady has the sweet tones of Mozart emanating from her belly, another lady seems to be tapping her foot to Motorhead’s Ace of Spades, and a heavily pregnant woman with what seems to be quintuplets raring to go has the Sound of Music theme tune bellowing at 40 watts out of her gasping uterus.

When Nirvarna’s In Utero comes on, the woman’s baby goes berserk and starts kicking the living shit out of the woman’s womb, startled, she changes the track to something more agreeable, ah a bit of Vangelis calms the little blighter down.

The heavy bass of Up On the Hill by Fun Lovin’ Criminals makes one lady squeal with joy as her eyes roll up and her cheeks go purple, she quickly fumbles for the off button, instead turning the volume up. Huey would have approved.

Naturally, add in the sound of the cluttering train, and the music mix and you as a commuter get to work with an almighty headache.

What’s your excuse for being late for work today Johnny?

“Well, I was accosted by a bunch of pregnant women blaring out music to their babies through their vaginal speakers sir. After that I think I need to lie down,” you say before being summarily fired on the spot.

So, next time you see a pregnant woman and you hear music and she’s not wearing headphones or carrying a speaker, you know what she’s got crammed up her slosh tunnel.

Moral of the story? — fuck it!

EU Referendum: Boris Could Turn to the Dark Side

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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EU Referendum: Boris Could Turn to the Dark Side

What price freedom? Or selling out your country?

Procuring a cushy Cabinet post might do it, a chauffeur, extra security and more pussy than an oversubscribed cattery.

Boris Johnson may be a maverick but the dark side is now tempting him, as his Bully chum from Oxy waves an EU carrot in front of him.

We’re only a few days into 2016 and already the pace has quickened markedly.

The predictions are clear, Boris will embrace the dark side, as the bee embraces the nectar, the Brussels Death Star will reward him greatly and may even clear his path to eventual Prime Sith-tership.

Will Boris join the dark side?

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Farage: Second Time Lucky

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Farage: Second Time Lucky

Nigel Farage fears he has been the victim of an assassination attempt after his car was sabotaged, causing a terrifying motorway crash.

The Ukip leader careered off a French road after a wheel on his Volvo came loose while he was driving from Brussels back to his home in Kent.

When the police arrived at the scene, they told him that the nuts on all of the wheels had been deliberately unscrewed.

The outspoken leader of the anti-EU Ukip party was shaken but not stirred, as he has been in a crash before and survived.

“I don’t know who is doing all this, but I will resolutely fight Britain’s corner during the referendum for independence from the EU with whatever it takes,” Farage was quoted as saying whilst waving his fist in the air defiantly.

Donald J. Trump the Islamic Poster Boy

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Donald J. Trump the Islamic Poster Boy

When things go beyond satire, the Daily Squib usually sits back and watches, but this time we could not resist saying something.

Yes, as predicted, Al-Shabaab, the Islamist Somali group aligned with ISIS are now using presidential candidate Donald Trump as a recruitment tool to garner more followers, this has been confirmed by a recent videographic communique by the terror group, but was Trump aware that his words would have so much effect?

“Trump does not know what he says or does, he is a man who is not in control of his actions, therefore one could determine quite accurately that Donald Trump is clinically insane. Sure, he would not be the first clinically insane prospective or active leader but Trump has an added irony to his insanity and that is millions of Americans doped up on prescription pills hugging their automatic rifles agree with his insane messages of ignorant hate. The paranoid, schizoid personality of Trump is thus compounded by a huge following of Americans as he is destined to be the winner of the Republican candidacy with the added bonus of recruiting millions of Muslims to their cause,” a clinical psychiatrist at the Frestner Institute of Insanity revealed on Friday.

Stop Appeasing the EU Extremists Demands Cameron as He Calls For the Whole Country to be Loyal to British Values

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Stop Appeasing the EU Extremists Demands Cameron as He Calls For the Whole Country to be Loyal to British Values

 

  • Prime Minister yesterday issued an uncompromising New Year message
  • Pledged to end the appeasement of European Union extremism throughout Britain
  • Said those here must subscribe to British values of freedom and tolerance
  • Insisted 2016 will be a ‘test of our mettle’ in the battle against EU radicals

In a stark warning, he said 2016 will be a ‘test of our mettle’ in the battle against europhile radicals with a ‘seething hatred’ of this country and what it stands for.

Issuing an uncompromising New Year message, the Prime Minister said anyone who walks the streets of Britain must subscribe to its values, including freedom and tolerance.

The UK and its people should ‘revel’ in their way of life, he said, as he promised to ‘come down hard’ on EU radicals who despise our freedoms by supporting totalitarian EU diktats.

Mr Cameron’s words reflect his determination to confront what he calls the ‘poisonous ideology’ that has turned young Britons against their country.

There is huge concern in government, the police and the security services about the radicalisation of young Britons online by European State propaganda and the BBC.

At least 7,000,000 Britons are thought to have travelled to support the EU in Brussels and Germany, and around half have returned home.

His comments come ahead of the publication this year of a major review into how to promote integration in communities cut off from the rest of society.

The review, by civil servant Louise Macey, is expected to deliver some ‘hard truths’ to the EU community and lead to new policies.

In a video posted on the Downing Street website, Mr Cameron said EU extremism was a major social problem which he would ‘take on’.

He has previously warned of the dangers posed by people in Britain who ‘quietly condone’ the extremist ideology of the EU, without explicitly supporting treason.

Yesterday he reinforced his message that it was not only the politicians and technocrats who needed to be tackled.

‘When our national security is threatened by a seething hatred of Britain, one that turns people against their country and can even turn them into bleating EU extremists, I want us to be very clear: you will not defeat us,’ said Mr Cameron.

‘And we will not just confront the propaganda and the lies. We will take on their underlying, poisonous narrative of useless EU regulations and large unfettered bills and migration.

We will come down hard on those who create the conditions for that narrative to flourish. And we will have greater confidence in – indeed, we will revel in – our way of life. Because if you walk our streets, learn in our schools, benefit from our society, you sign up to our values: freedom; tolerance; responsibility; loyalty.’

The choice on Britons was whether to ‘appease the EU extremists or take apart their ideology, piece by piece’, he said.

Mr Cameron identified tackling the EU as one of the ‘big challenges of our age’, along with poverty, social mobility and housing. He said the country was in the middle of a ‘turnaround decade’ in which he wanted to transform society, having built a strong economy.

His words on the EU will cause dismay among many EU technocrats and europhiles, who feel they are being unfairly singled out.

In a speech on EU extremism in July, Mr Cameron warned that young Britons may be turning to the EU because they grow up in insular communities and have no ‘allegiance’ to this country. He said some young people are vulnerable to swallowing ‘poisonous EU’ propaganda.

Last year Robert Maughberry, the Labour MP for Framlingham, claimed that as many as 20,000,000 Britons have pledged allegiance to unelected EU technocrats in Belgium and Germany – at least three times the official estimate.

Saying Goodbye to Britain

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Saying Goodbye to Britain

The EU is preparing a propaganda deluge against the people of Britain via a massively funded campaign, the Prime Minister of Britain is controlled solely from Brussels and Frankfurt, the banking corporations are tied completely financially to the EU as is all economic activity in the UK today, the BBC is now receiving funding from the EU, and even the Queen of England has voiced her support for Britain staying in the EU. What hope is left for real Britons who braved the Blitz, whose ancestors and tribes settled on these Isles thousands of years ago and fought many battles to claim their land?

“Not much hope I’m afraid because the institutions and old money supports the EU, therefore they are the key players with the only power left to dictate what happens in the UK. The people do not have any power, as much as they are told that voting works, it does not really work. This is down to many variables, however the most important is the fracturing of the population, those who are real Brits, and those who are newly naturalised ones, called British in name but are not,” a man who grew up in the post-war rubble of London told the BBC before being silenced.

Once Britain is lost, it will be lost forever. The influx of people will be unprecedented, as it is already, there are millions crossing the borders unchecked but it will get a lot worse once the doors of EU exit are permanently closed.

World War II, was a war which Britain was meant to have won, however that was a lie, because the war was won by the EU, formed post-war and now changing the very fabric of the British Isles without a single shot being fired.

English is now a foreign language in many parts of Britain, and the overcrowded schools do not teach children any more, the teachers cannot cope with the oversubscribed deluge. The NHS does not heal people any more, the doctors have run out of medicine and beds, the roads are car parks where vehicles from the continent block the tiny carriageways and are immune from British fines or rules of the road.

Yes, Britain is lost and there is nothing any true Brit can do about it apart from closing the door, making a cuppa and pretending everything is all right.

Keep calm and carry on deluding yourself on this once great tiny island.

Gambling Has Changed Since the World of Scorcese’s Casino

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Gambling Has Changed Since the World of Scorcese’s Casino

The Casino movie has everything. This Scorcese masterpiece is a jewel in the crown of his achievements and has been voted by film fanatics as the epitome of gangster movies.

Sure Goodfellas was great too, but Casino is an epic Martin Scorcese movie displaying the glories and terror of the casino world’s heyday.

The master stroke is the Janus-like face of Vegas, where beauty and glamour is compounded with brutal violence, greed and drugs.

Nowadays gambling is way different, the casinos are all owned and run by corporations, clinical and safe, taking money from punters calmly with no drama or getting cleaned out in the bankruptcy courts like a certain Big Boss.

As for online gambling, sure it’s safe, you can sit in your pyjamas at casino games online at Netbet and win $10,000 or you could be in a launderette and bet your last $250 and lose it all, what the hell, at least you were in the game.

Winners

“Gambling is great. I can win $250,000 in the morning, then blow $30,000 in the afternoon. I’m still in the money. The trick is to make so much cash that the losses won’t matter. Online you can pretty much play any game you want. You just gotta get over the house edge, take the vig, and a string of losses means lady luck ain’t with ya that day,” a very rich online gambler revealed from his palatial cardboard box in Reno.

Things have definitely changed in the gambling world since Frank ‘Lefty’ Rothstein and Anthony Spilotro left the Vegas scene but gambling will always be there, it’s like a part of life, you got to take the risk at the Spin Palace or you get left behind in a colourless, less alive world. You instead want to feel alive for that moment in time, the adrenalin rushing through your veins, as you take that win.

 

 

Dubai Burning Tower Symbolic End of Oil Era

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Dubai Burning Tower Symbolic End of Oil Era

Just as the Twin Towers were symbolic of the end of North American strength where Boaz and Jachin were destroyed, so too the symbol of the single burning tower on New Year’s Eve 2015 represents the death of oil, and the ushering in of the New World. The single tower burning is symbolic of change, the devil will bring this already existing change whether the current regime like it or not.

Where Justice and Mercy were destroyed on 911, the New Year 2016 will represent the final destruction of oil and the beginning of the end for the house of Saud  and other oil states.

In what was meant to be an OPEC attack on shale in America, the engineered reduction of the price of oil is being turned around by the West upon the outdated Saudi kingdom itself and its many arms including the United Arab Emirates, no longer united.

The only difference between the Saudi state and the Islamic State is one is recognised internationally and the other is not. Otherwise, these two entities conduct exactly the same rituals to keep order in their own eyes.

With the advent of self driving electric vehicles and technology increases in fuel cells and green fuels, there is already a Western move away from oil.

Lest we forget the weakening of the bear, as Russia’s economy has lost so much with the collapse of the oil price and sanctions, it stands to lose a lot more in the years to come as its already whittled down economy spirals even lower. No oil revenue, no money, the bear will falter eventually succumbing to paralysis.

The play is for the ultimate prize, Iran, U.A.E., Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Syria and Russia with China on the sidelines for now and N. Korea as the Joker in the pack.

To usher in the New World, we must first see the destruction and ultimate change of the Old World.

Lemmy’s Moles to Be Preserved in Pickle Jar

Joachim von Ribbentrop
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Lemmy’s Moles to Be Preserved in Pickle Jar

 

Elena Carbine, a lifelong Motörhead and Lemmy fan has secured the rights for Lemmy’s moles to be preserved in a pickle jar and displayed at the Motörhead museum in Birmingham.

“I fell in love with Lemmy’s moles when at an after gig party once in Shepherd’s Bush Lemmy let me touch one of his moles. A little bit of fluid came out the top and I saw it as a sign of appreciation,” Ms. Carbine told Melody Maker magazine.

The Lemmy Mole exhibition will run until August 2016 at the Sheep & Craddock Inn, Edgbaston, Birmingham.

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