Charlie Sheen to Star in Platoon II

LOS ANGELES - USA - HIV positive Hollywood star, Charlie Sheen is set to star in a sequel to hit film Platoon, he has told media sources.


“I’m into self destruction myself, so I jumped at the role when I read the script. The director himself has full blown AIDS, and he knows what it’s like to carry around two hundred pills everywhere. I’m on the edge myself, never used a condom and been with anything that moves. The lead role takes point, then goes into a hooch and falls in love with a Vietcong lady, the fact that she got every disease under the sun doesn’t cross the character’s mind, and he has to do the rest of his tour whilst suffering from gonorrhoea and herpes. In those days they didn’t have HIV thank god, but I got it now in real life. I’m still winning though, winning the fight against full blown AIDS.”

The party-hard star is a real fighter and HIV is totally manageable these days as long as the sufferer takes a cocktail of drugs every day to stay alive.

Tiger Blood

“It’s about mixing, a lil coke here, an anti-viral there, maybe some amphetamines, some crack and a toot of pcp, that usually gets me outta bed in the afternoon. By midnight I’m partying, maybe doing ten chicks a night, some she-males, whatever. Might get a call from the producer or script coordinator, then I’m back filming the next day if they can get me outta bed. This is the life I wanted and I’m lovin’ it. When you have tiger blood, HIV ain’t nothing.”

Charlie Sheen, has even named his human immunodeficiency virus, which the star is now playfully calling ‘Tinder’.


  • Ermakov

    According to the information space ICD diagnosis (diagnosis is determined by the photo and treatment recommendations) Charlie Sheen benign tumor of the bronchial tubes. According to the ICD in the individual receiving liquid food morning and evening all viruses suppressed within 1-3 days and the patient is healthy.
    Unfortunately, modern medicine does not own a diagnostics and treatments.
    P Ermakov, professor, Dnepropetrovsk,

    • Lestat

      You saying Charlie has lung cancer? I wouldn’t be surprised because he smokes about 400 a day. HIV and cancer…he surely has been blessed.

  • Shauna

    Hey I don’t care if Charlie has HIV I want 2 sleep with him. Please Charlie if you read this email

    Boyle Heights gal


  • pete

    He’s America’s Gazza but worse.

  • Janine

    I used to like Charlie but now I realize he was sleeping with women and young men knowing full well that he had AIDS. THAT is sick beyond belief? He could get arrested for manslaughter so I read he paid these ppl off. WTF? Chalie is like a loaded gun what makes you think he will stop now even if he has got AIDS? If Charlie had followed Jesus and the Gospel he would not be in this situation and those others would not be infected. AIDS is a curse from God. Those who sin like Charlie now have a death sentence. I pray for his soul to save him from Satan.

    • ef

      You religous kooks really ballin. WTF has Jesus got to do with anything?

      • Janine

        The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery;

        idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord,
        jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions

        and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I
        warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not
        inherit the kingdom of God.

        Galatians 5:19-0

  • Lestat

    AIDS is back taking its territory to new heights. This guy Charlie Sheen he was playing with fire and got burnt. Anyone who is promiscuous now will get AIDS sooner or later even if you use a condom but he didn’t. It’s just part of the process.

  • Mick Richard

    Jesus Christ…whoever wrote this should be shot and pisssed on…

  • alpha444

    How does a guy his age pull off being a young enlisted guy in Vietnam?

  • David Harrison

    He’ll be great playing a POW.

  • Sony leak
  • Yolanda

    His parents must have dropped him in the tub again and again when he was a baby.

  • Don

    Everyone got hiv in Hollywood

  • Swisscheeze

    It must suck to be you.. Chris Taylor