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Thursday, June 22, 2017
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Cosby Juror: “When I Sat Down in Court Bill Handed Me...

PENNSYLVANIA - USA - One of the jurors in the Bill Cosby rape case, an attractive 28-year-old woman has revealed that she does not remember much of the case or jury deliberation.

Guy Ritchie Del Boy King Arthur Falls On Its Sword

LOS ANGELES - USA - Whichever Warner Bros executive thought it would be wise to spend $175 million on a Guy Ritchie King Arthur flick must be either mad as a box of frogs or as gullible as a Remoaner listening to Tony Blair talking about re-joining the EU.

Johnny Depp Fed Lines Through Earpiece For Everyday Conversations

LOS ANGELES - USA - Johnny Depp's former managers have claimed the star is fed everyday conversation lines through an earpiece so he doesn't have to think when he talks, US media say.

Oscars Doo Doo Land Wins

HOLLYWOOD - USA - No one has heard of the films that were allegedly winners in this year's Oscar ceremony last night. The funny thing is it did not matter if there was a mix up for best picture with a geriatric Beatty barely recognising where he was, it just did not matter because the films involved were so unmemorable.

Why Boycotting BBC Licence is Only Way to Induce Change

LONDON - England - Already millions of people are not paying the BBC licence fee, a tax that is imposed on the population of Britain even though many do not watch the BBC or even connect their TVs to the network.

World Powers Convene After Brangelina Split

NEW YORK - USA - The United Nations security council has convened in emergency session after news trickled through that Angelina Jolie has split from Brad Pitt.

Privileged Actress Gives Up Wealth and Status to Live in Afghanistan

LONDON - England - Carey Mulligan, a deeply socialist actress has vowed to donate all her millions and go and live in Afghanistan.

Streisand to Get Nose Job if Trump Wins

LOS ANGELES - USA - Acclaimed nasal cartilage toting Barbra Streisand is joining the list of disgruntled celebrities threatening to do something bad if Donald Trump is elected president.

Luvvie EU Parade Smacks of Corporatism, Hypocrisy and is Anti-Art

LONDON - England - As predicted, David Cameron and his campaign managers have arranged for various celebrities to be wheeled out urging Britons to vote to remain in the EU.

Emma Watson Named in Panama Papers

LONDON - England - The Harry Potter actress, Emma Watson has been named in the leaked Panama papers relating to offshore bank accounts.