A smoky boardroom in the 1950s. A group of tired policymakers are arguing about how to expand the tax base without raising taxes and causing a revolt.
Suddenly, the door swings open.
Enter Edward Bernays, the father of public relations, nephew of Sigmund Freud, and man who could convince the public to enthusiastically buy anything from cigarettes to bacon.
He looks around, raises an eyebrow, and says:
“Gentlemen… you’re thinking about this the wrong way.”
A confused bureaucrat asks, “Mr Bernays, how do we encourage the other half of the population to join the workforce?”
Bernays smiles, the smile of a man who sees society not as people, but as a receptive psychological canvas.
“We’ll make it desirable.”
“Desirable?” they ask.
“Yes, we’ll tell women that going to an office is liberation. Freedom. Self-actualisation. Glamour. Progress. Modernity. A beautifully marketed escape from the shackles of ‘domestic oppression’. Fighting against the ‘patriarchy’ empowering feminism. We won’t push them out of the home… no, no, no…”
He leans in.
“We’ll make them choose it.”
One of the politicians gasps. Another faints.
Bernays continues:
“You can sell anything to women as long as you frame it as empowerment.”
“Then we can tax two incomes instead of one. The GDP goes up. The public thinks it’s their idea. And the best part?”
He pauses, theatrically.
“We sell them a whole new line of products they’ll need once they’re too busy to cook.”
The room erupts into applause.
If there’s one thing Edward Bernays excelled at, it was turning ordinary objects into symbols of liberation.
Cars? Freedom.
Bacon? Masculinity.
Cigarettes? Women’s empowerment, obviously.
In 1929, he orchestrated the famous “Torches of Freedom” stunt, where debutantes marched in the Easter Parade smoking cigarettes to protest “patriarchal oppression.”
(It was actually orchestrated by Bernays on behalf of the tobacco industry, which wanted to double its consumer base.)
And with that single PR sleight-of-hand, smoking went from “unladylike” to “rebellious empowerment with a side of lung disease.”
Forward to 2025: Dropping fertility rates, stressed women, increase in cancer, depression, loneliness and women’s hair falling out…but more tax has made it worthwhile.
“It was always the women, and above all the young ones, who were the most bigoted adherents of the Party, the swallowers of slogans, the amateur spies and nosers-out of unorthodoxy.”
― George Orwell, 1984
BIGOT