Juncker: “Brexit Will Not Protect Britain From EU Army Invasion”

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Jean Claude Juncker has threatened Britain once again, this time using the menacing spectre of a rogue EU army converging on our islands.



“We will take Britain one way or another. You can Brexit all you want, but can you hold out against an EU Army so large that we could take the UK in two days? Britain will be our first port of call, then finish Russia once and for all, then anyone else who disagrees with our Imperialistic expansion policies,” the EU president told an open session for the EU Commission on Friday.

The threat of a conscripted army made up of 27 nations converging on Britain is certainly something to think about.

Could our currently depleted underfunded armed forces cope with such an invasion from the EU?

Probably not is the answer from Major General Giles Viceroy.

“Unfortunately, the MoD has been largely depleted under the tenure of Cameron. The Navy has been practically dismantled, and the Air Force is in dire straits. Budget cuts and mass redundancies has seen the British armed forces at their lowest ebb, all thanks to David Cameron.”

Thankfully, there is still some time to prepare for such an eventuality as an EU army invasion on these shores. The current PM has to increase MoD funding by 190% and this way we’d have a fighting chance.

“The British spirit is one that never gives up. We saw off that Hitler chap, Napoleon and the Romans, so we can certainly see off the EU army. Sinking the Eurotunnel would be the first order of the day, but that’s about as much as I’m prepared to give away,” the Major General added.

Once again, Britain has a menacing threat lurking across the Channel waiting for the day to attack us.

We will never surrender Juncker, Never, Never, Never Surrender.