Cryogenically Frozen Brain Transplanted in Wrong Body, Claims Surgeon

TURIN - Italy - Professor Sergio Cannelloni, Director of the Shroud Advanced Neuromodulation Group, who carried out the world's first brain transplant 10 months ago may have had a minor mishap during one of his operations.

 

The surgeon likes to work with hundreds of patients wanting new bodies and has a conveyor belt traction system in his operating room.

“I had just come off the golf course into the operating theatre and did not look at the list properly. Well, they wheeled in the brain and a body and I plonked it unceremoniously in the skull cavity. When the patient woke up he started oinking and said it was the wrong fucking body donor,” professor Cannelloni told NeuroScience Weekly magazine.

What the dozy surgeon had done was to transplant the brain of a pig into the body of an EU politician.

“The funny thing was, there was barely any difference in the awakened cadaver’s usual routine. He immediately went towards a trough we have for waste products and started to scoff away, much like a real eurocrat in real life. Of course, he was content after his meal of offal and bits,” one of the attending nurses revealed.

The recently released patient has gone back to being an unelected Italian representative in the EU Commission with a vast expense account, huge salary, unlimited travel benefits, and massive pension pot.