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London Cabbies Sing Uber Alles

Hugo De Strath
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London Cabbies Sing Uber Alles

Fed up of being charged £50 to go a few yards in a London cab? Well the new app Uber has come to the rescue with millions of Londoners using its service to get better, cheaper transport, much to the chagrin of the bloated London cabbies raking in vast fortunes in their black cabs.

The London cabbie is a curious creature, they have a monopoly on making huge profits from anyone who gets in one of their public carriages and live the life of Riley, but not for long.

“That’ll be £89 mate,” a London cabbie told a tourist after making a journey from Leicester Square to Covent Garden.

As tube train drivers earn in excess of £60,000 per annum, so too will the overpaid London cabbies one day get their comeuppance for fleecing the public with their rip off scam.

Plans are already underfoot to replace underground trains with automated systems eradicating the cost of paying the drivers, which will no doubt reduce the insane ticket prices on the tube, the union strikes and the cost of pensions.

The future will be automated for London cabs too, as Google cars and their like take over, replaced by driverless cabs controlled by central control centres, reducing the costs for the end user.

Iraq Vichy Government on Tenuous Ground Says History

Hugo De Strath
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0
Iraq Vichy Government on Tenuous Ground Says History

Just like the Nazis installed the Vichy government in WW2 France, with the tenets of “Travail, famille, patrie” the Iraqis surrendered to the American conquistadors consorting with the de facto enemy.

History thus dictates that as Saigon fell, so will Baghdad be repatriated to its original owners.

Invading governments need to appreciate that unless they cleanse a whole nation completely after invasion, thousands of years of original rule cannot be erased in one instant. There will always be factions of the original status quo fighting to reclaim ownership of ‘their’ land.

Mosul has fallen, as has Falluja, slowly but surely the mass will gravitate towards Baghdad, and soon take that as well. If one needs a picture, imagine the evacuation of Saigon, with Hueys perched on top of tall buildings and desperate people scrambling up ladders to grab onto the landing gear as the choppers already fully laden lift off into air.

Obama’s Laissez Faire foreign policy is of course partly to blame, however, one must not discount the all too probable modus operandi at work where chaos can be made to work for certain factions within the global consortium.

Kabul, Cairo, Kiev, Baghdad, Tripoli, are all existing assets of the United States, but for how much longer?

World War III started a long time ago, but the general populace are only now starting to see little conflicts flaring up globally, eventually, the sleeping masses may wake up as all the little bursts of energy become one large burst.

Iraq: Obama May Get Second Nobel Peace Prize After Fall of Mosul

Hugo De Strath
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0
Iraq: Obama May Get Second Nobel Peace Prize After Fall of Mosul

President Obama is tipped to get his second Nobel Peace Prize for the fall of Mosul by Al-Qaeda fighters in Iraq, Henry Drawber, a Nobel Peace Prize judge, revealed today.

“Mosul, is Iraq’s second-largest city, home to one million people, and it was overrun by Al-Qaeda today. With Obama giving up half of Ukraine, and now Iraq, we definitely think he’s up for the peace prize. I’m going to smoke that fat joint Obama sent over from America, where he is the chief dealer now.”

Since president Obama’s inauguration, the world has seen less war, less economic hardship and more war within the fake resurgence in the global economy.

The president won his first Nobel Peace Prize because…

Study: Politicians Are Capable of Feeling Regret

Hugo De Strath
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0
Study: Politicians Are Capable of Feeling Regret

 

Researchers set up a test called Taxpayer Expenses in which the politicians had to decide how much taxpayers’ money they could swindle from a dwindling pot.

“They just couldn’t help themselves,” Professor Smirno Radish, of Kentucky Fry University, told the BBC. “They had helping after helping of taxpayer money, and even came back for seconds, but we saw something truly astonishing with some of them, a pang of regret.”

In some cases, the politicians decided to move on from one expense account to another resulting in deep seated regret that they could not swindle even more freebies.

Faced with this scenario, the politicians often stopped and looked back at the previous expense payments and were regretful that they did not get more, and more and more.

“Many of our politician study members expressed regret when the expense accounts were reduced in size over a period of time. They wished they had stolen more money,” he said.

The study, published in “Parliament Today”, questions claims that regret is a uniquely non-politician’s emotion.

Next week, professor Radish wants to conduct a study on BBC executives.

Scotland to Rebuild Hadrian’s Wall

Hugo De Strath
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0
Scotland to Rebuild Hadrian’s Wall

 

“We don’t just want to break up the United Kingdom but we want to completely remove ourselves from the rest of the mainland. The wall will be even higher than before and this time we’re going to build it to keep the English out.”

The Scots will also be required to wear blue paint on their faces, even when it rains, which is 99% of the time in Scotland.

Anyone venturing that far North may have to have a shield handy as the wall will be guarded by mad Scots armed with spears and heavy rocks.

Rik Mayall Finally Gets to Swindon

Hugo De Strath
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0
Rik Mayall Finally Gets to Swindon

It was a hard car journey, vomitous, violent and fucking hilarious, but Rik finally got to Swindon to attend that sales conference.

Is Swindon heaven or hell? That’s an existential question best left for another millennia.

As the strains of Spandau Ballet ooze through the ether, let’s hope for Rik’s sake that the disc is not jammed again.

The EU is Testament to Failure of D-Day

Hugo De Strath
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0
The EU is Testament to Failure of D-Day

 

“Those poor fools in Normandy, they died for nothing, as much of the Allies in WW2. They were sold the story that they were fighting for freedom, and yet look at us now, the same people who Britain fought are now in charge of Europe, and are now dictating Britain’s laws,” a politician in Westminster revealed one day after the D-Day anniversary celebrations.

Hitler would have been proud of the EU because they managed what he wanted to achieve covertly and without a single shot being fired.

Now the tables are turned, as we presently have less freedoms than we had in 1944. George Orwell would be truly shocked to see what has happened today, a thousand times worse than his dystopian vision of 1984.

Just as Hitler was thwarted by his suicidal attack on Russia, so too has the EU’s covert destabilising attack on Kiev with a coup brought the front forward right onto Russia’s doorstep. History repeats itself, as the bold fall hardest, could Russia once again be the stumbling block for the conquistadors?

Only time will tell.

Surveillance Camera Man: Cameras, Cameras Everywhere Even Here!

Hugo De Strath
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0
Surveillance Camera Man: Cameras, Cameras Everywhere Even Here!

You walked down the street, you were tracked by multiple cameras, you took the underground, then you were filmed in all of your glory, you went into a shop and the cameras followed you, you drove your car and your entire journey was filmed and tracked. You’re at home and the surveillance cameras can be activated on your phone and computer.

There are cameras on everyone’s phone, cameras on every laptop and tablet computer, there are cameras in the sky on drones, watching you every minute of the day.

So what’s the big deal when someone walks around actively filming with a camera?

Why Google Glassholes May Need Their Own Island

Hugo De Strath
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0
Why Google Glassholes May Need Their Own Island

Professor Rodrigues Martine, of Boston Applied Science University outlines some of the vagaries of being a ‘glasshole’.

“What stands for Google, who are supreme innovators in the technical field, certainly does not stand for the rest of the mundane population.

“This is why they need to open their own exclusive territory where people dedicated to the transhumanist ideology can be free from the masses.

“The Google glass is one small step towards a bigger prize, but it will be hard to sell to the general public purely because big technological jumps are usually frowned upon by most.

“Try picking your kid up from school whilst wearing your Google glass, and you may be arrested or beaten up by other parents. Try going to a pub with your Google glass, and you may get glassed literally with a broken pint glass.

“The answer for Google is to acquire its own technological island, instil its own laws, currency, advanced military systems and to promote freedom, the thirst for ultimate knowledge, life extension and an advanced technological society that transcends the sedentary morose societal and governmental structures in place in existing countries today. Governments around the world today are sluggish corrupt organisations still entrenched in the past, it is best to start from scratch, because the entrenched nature of these entities are irreparable.

“Google certainly has the money to start its own colony, city, country and government, so what is holding them back?”

Think Tank: How Socialism Kills Economies, Innovation and Entrepreneurship

Hugo De Strath
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0
Think Tank: How Socialism Kills Economies, Innovation and Entrepreneurship

“Britain’s great past is filled with invention, and it seems those days are all over, purely because of the socialist system we are living in now.

“You may say, hang on a minute, the Conservatives are half in power now, but that is a hollow point to make because the internal system is socialist in nature, whoever is in power. Britain’s massive welfare bill is testament to this fact.

“Socialism not only kills economies dead, look at Hollande, Obama and Brown, but it stifles the raw hunger for creative success, which can only be achieved in a free economy where welfare spending is limited. Rawness of innovation flourishes when people are up against the wall, do or die should be the mantra, not languishing in taxpayer funded housing projects withering away in slow rot mode.

“Britain’s post war welfare state created by socialists formed a cushion for the unfortunate masses who could not be bothered to innovate or educate themselves. The welfare state today in the UK is an over bloated free for all where success, education and prosperity are actively discouraged.

“Poverty breeds poverty, and socialism as a construct encourages further breeding of people who have no hope, no education and no will to contribute to humanity.

“The same is also true in America where millions of people languish in welfare projects on food stamps. These places of squalor, are a testament to the failure of socialism unlike an alternative innovative forward looking political ideology.

“If there ever is a proper ideological party that comes into power, there would be value in demolishing these socialist systems, which not only suck money out of the economy but encourage people to be lazy, stupid, ignorant and ultimately poor. The useless eaters of society are pretty much that, a burden on knowledge, a burden on humanity moving forward to increased heights, they need to be cut loose, to extinguish their free ticket would be the best thing for them and the planet.”

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