Mugabe Surprised to Win Election Again

HARARE - Zimbabwe - Robert Mugabe has been taken aback at the vote tally after a close election contest after being pleasantly surprised to have won by such a massive landslide.

England Fans Declare Euro Championship Boring

LONDON - England - The Euro 2008 Football Championship was declared a boring washout by England fans today in a poll commissioned by BBC 6 Sports.

Soviet British State Celebrates Comrade Brown’s First Year as Supreme Leader

LONDON - England - Supreme unelected leader Comrade Gordon Brown was today honoured by high party officials and the people for his first year's unelected leadership with a Soviet parade and festivities showcasing the Soviet states might and Bolshevik spirit.