Cardi B Loses Cardigan in Knitting Accident

LOS ANGELES - USA - Urgent reports are coming in that celebrity Cardi B has lost her cardigan in a knitting accident, or something like that.

It has been reported that a celebrity called Cardi B, who not many people have heard of, has lost her cardigan in a freak knitting accident.

According to showbiz outlets, the so-called star was knitting another G-string for her new autotune performance in front of screaming 10-year-old girls, when she accidentally made a cardigan before losing it later on in the day.

“My leetle brain it cannot comprehend. I knit this and that and lose it, I wanted a G-string for my porno show but instead I knit a cardigan for my poodle. I do not know what a cardigan is, I had to look it up in a dictionary, plus I cannot read or write but my maid tell me the words,” a distraught Cardi B was quoted as saying.

The current celebrity world is completely up in arms about this recent setback, and many are thankfully thinking of suicide as an option.

The drama was reported in all showbiz celebrity news sources and has now gone viral amongst the brain-dead.

Curiously enough, no one knows if the reports are true and many don’t fucking care.

If anyone knows who Cardi B is, or was, please keep it to yourself and do not spread it all over some inconsequential social network.

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