17.7 C
London
Wednesday, December 4, 2024
secret satire society
HomeEntertainmentMadonna Seen Flying with Commercial Airline to Cut Carbon Footprint

Madonna Seen Flying with Commercial Airline to Cut Carbon Footprint

LONDON - England - Madonna was seen on a Transatlantic flight yesterday. In an age where stars travel in their own private jets, Madonna has made a concerted effort to cut down on her carbon footprint.

Since her momentous performance at the much criticised Live Earth extravaganza, Madonna has been making every effort to please the pundits and naysayers by trying to reduce her huge carbon footprint.

The great lady now embarks on journeys across the pond to her homeland and back flying first class of course on commercial airlines.

In fact, she was just spotted the other day flying in first class from New York to London. A fellow passenger witnessed her ‘Madgesty’ eating her food in a very interesting manner.

The star, who does not eat solid food anymore and has not for the last fifteen years, injected her arm with a four course meal and dessert.

Madonna explained in an interview to Hello magazine in May that she has a five star Michelin rated chef cook a four course meal for her every day.

Once the meal is cooked it is all blended in a bucket and then the juices and nutrients are extracted into a tiny vial. This groundbreaking technique has been adopted by many celebrities now and saves on the whole messy eating solid food process.

Her private chef Gilles Rais divulged to the Daily Squib that during the seven hour flight from New York Madonna injected herself with one vial consisting of a starter of Soupe d’aiglefin fumé, tartare de loup de mer caviar d’Osciètre followed by a scrumptious Risotto de petits légumes de saison.

The next course was Rouget de roche, fricassée de calamars et brandade de morue jus de bouillabaisse, followed shortly by Assiette de cochon de lait rôti et son jus de cuisson.

Dessert was the finest Croustade de pommes caramélisées glace au miel et gingembre washed down with some Café “Pur Arabica”, petits fours et chocolats du Manoir.

Having partaken of this astounding meal Madonna was seen to belch ever so gently into her handkerchief.

The rest of the passengers however had to make do with either rubberised chicken and soggy vegetables or a microwaved vegetarian lasagne which tasted like cardboard.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!