17.7 C
Saturday, June 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldPupil Who Identifies as a Toilet Brush Applauded by Woke Teachers

Pupil Who Identifies as a Toilet Brush Applauded by Woke Teachers

PORTLAND - Oregon - A pupil who identifies as a toilet brush has been praised by zees woke teachers at Wokeville elementary.

Wokeville elementary school has awarded a pupil in year eight an award for being the Woke Student of the Year. Tommy Wu, who attends the school, identifies as a toilet brush. The gender inclusive school is a woke academy where the classrooms are adorned with gay rainbows and children are encouraged to explore anal sex and transgenderism.

Things are not always so rosy however at the school, especially when another pupil in Tommy’s class was not happy that ze identified as a toilet brush. The teacher of the class intervened and castigated the ‘young human with a womb’ for daring to question Tommy’s gender as a toilet brush. Tommy also goes by the pronouns: “plop, plap, splash” and sometimes “zees”.

“He goes to our toilets and sticks his head in the bowl, cleaning the poo off the sides. I personally find it disgusting,” Sarah Abbyorshun, told the teacher.

“How dare you misgender and question our Tommy Toilet Brush? You are a despicable bigoted ‘young human with a womb’ . Go to Ms Simmons’ office now, and I shall see to it that you are suspended from school,” the woke teacher wailed.

“Yes, Tommy is a bit smelly, but that’s “plop’s” gender affirmative inclusive progressive woke right to identify as a toilet brush. “Plop” is actually doing us a service here, I mean have you ever seen our toilets as clean as this?” the teacher added in class.

Tommy nodded zees toilet brush head in agreement, and a large piece of poo which was still stuck to the brush unlatched itself and flew across the room, entering the teacher’s open mouth avec un little plop sound.


  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -





The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »