Boris: “No Need to Self-Isolate if Infected With Covid”

LONDON - England - Boris Johnson has declared that those infected with the Covid virus will no longer need to self-isolate.

Boris hospital - xi jinping self-isolate laughing coronavirus

Yes, we understand that Boris Johnson is being pursued by a horrid assortment of deranged lefties and remainers for the ‘partygate’ fiasco, however does endangering the entire population of Britain by announcing that the infected will no longer need to self-isolate placate his detractors?

We are guaranteed Covid mutations in the future, and the prognosis is not good. There will be viral variations that are increasingly deadly, therefore anyone who has underlying health problems will recieve a certain death sentence. Omicron has been labelled as mild, but it still is doing some decent killing in numbers.

No masks, no isolation for the infected, this is a script from another dystopian film where some deadly virus is allowed to spread across a country simply because a politician wants to get re-elected. Was this insane idea one of Carrie’s insane ideas? In this case, probably not, it must be an amalgamation of Borisian thinking and that of one of his newly appointed SPADS.

What can we now expect in the future? We can expect an increase in infected people. This is an almost guaranteed data point, and we can also expect an increase in deaths. There will be a decrease in official figures for infections however because there will be no more covid testing, or either that the results will be suppressed.

Being infected by covid, even for the supremely healthy, is not something to gloss over. Once this virus enters the body, it attacks the entire body, including the heart, lungs and brain. Long-term fatigue, and other severe damage to the internal organs occur, but scientists are still studying the effects of this virus and learning new things every day.

Alternatively, none of the above monstrous stuff may happen. Boris would have got it right, and we all live happily ever after with the virus no more irksome than a common cold. The economy starts to rocket up again, people go on their holidays and life returns to pre-2019 levels. Huzzah! Boris is re-elected for his stroke of genius, and Carrie is granted bucket loads of designer wallpaper for the Number 10 flat for free.