17.7 C
London
Thursday, April 18, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldEU Redistribution of 10% Wealth in Southern Cyprus Necessary Says Brussels

EU Redistribution of 10% Wealth in Southern Cyprus Necessary Says Brussels

LIMASSOL - Cyprus - EU officials say it is necessary that 10% of all bank deposits on the bankrupt Greek half of the island be taken from their owners.

“The EU is a tool for redistribution of wealth and negation of sovereignty. When we took away your sovereignty with you Greek Cypriots signing the EU charter years ago, all your rights, and your wealth, are now completely the property of the EU. Read the small print. We will be doing this to the rest of the EU countries soon. You will not be able to take your money out of the banks as we will shut down those as well,” an unnamed, unelected technocrat from Brussels told the Greek Cyprus radio network last night.

Rudolpho Hess, an ECB banking official said from Frankfurt yesterday: “The EU budget this year has been a heavy burden on the economy of the eurozone. We need to increase expense accounts for MEPs, technocrats and bankers in the EU; luxury hotels, foreign holidays with first class flights, gourmet meals every day and of course the steady supply of Fräuleins to keep our bratwursts up. So, you see our Cypriot friends, you chose to sign on the dotted line with your greedy eyes on those EU subsidies and this is what you get for your squandering profligate lazy ways. Enjoy yourselves, believe me, I am surely enjoying myself at your expense. Don’t forget, you can still give Greece 10 points in the Eurovision Song Contest.”

As of Monday, there will be a 10% compulsory EU tax on all southern Cyprus bank accounts.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"

5 COMMENTS

  1. They should start be redistributing the wealth of Rumpoy, Schulz & Barosso & their gravy train junkies in Brussels which is sucking the lifeblood out of sovereign states & inflicting pain on citizens in much the same disdain for as Hitler

  2. You should of thought about that before putting all your eggs in a jumped up banana republic darling. No sympathy from me.

  3. Shorting eur/usd tonight. Good luck all if you want to make a serious packet on the euro's demise then get in there and mash it up. Capital flight and uncertaint

  4. I URGE SPANISH ITALIAN GREEK COMPATRIOTS AND PEOPLES TO PLEAS TAKE YOUR MONEY OUT OF THE BANKS IMMEDIATELY IF YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR MONEY THERE IS SOMETHING GOING TO HAPPEN SOON IN EU. I WORKED MY WHOLE LIFE AND SAVED ONLY TO MY MONEY BE STOLEN BECAUSE OF OTHER PEOPLE. THIS SERIOUS YOU MUST PLEAS E LISTEN TO ME NOW ! EVEN IN UK YOU ARE NOT SAFE. IF YOU HAVE SAVINGS IN CASH BUY GOLD REAL GOLD BULLION. MOVE MONEY OUT OF EUROPE NOW BEFORE TOO LATE . IF YOU DO NOT YOU WILL LOOSE IT ALL! YOU READ IT HERE FIRST YOU MUST ACT NOW FOR YOUR FAMILY SAKE. THEY WILL COME FOR THE MONEY IN BANKS AND THE REST TOO!

  5. I have my retirement fund here I wish I had retired in North Cyprus now. The stupid Greek gov here are all crooks and cheats. I am going to move back to London now and take everything with me. Sickening!! Screw the EU!

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »