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LONDON - England - Channel 4 once again plums the depths by trying to raise their ratings with erect penises.
MANCHESTER - England - The Jeremy Kyle show has been suspended after a vulnerable guest committed suicide.
CHICAGO - USA - Reality TV celebrity, Kylie Jenner, said she didn't like orange juice much today, causing orange futures to crash.
COLUMBUS - USA - Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump has shot himself in the head during a campaign performance that left many in the crowd sick.
LONDON - England - A 46-year-old man from Croydon, South London was arrested yesterday for questioning why the X Factor was headline news across the British media.