Constable Turnley from the Croydon Metropolitan police branch revealed the details of the arrest: “A man in his mid forties was arrested today in a dawn raid for actually questioning why the X Factor is constantly headline news on all British newspapers and media. The man dared to question the relevance of having such an important life changing piece of news in the forefront of all media. He was detained and charged with charges relating to questioning authority and mass media control. We are also contemplating charging him with domestic terrorism and he could thus be detained at an undisclosed location indefinitely or extradited to America to continue a brutal and lengthy sentence for the rest of his life.”
The yet unnamed man was arrested in a dawn raid yesterday morning, his neighbours say they witnessed a group of approximately twelve heavily armed special police exit an unmarked van, break the man’s house door down, then drag him down the stairs head first with his hands handcuffed behind his back.
Alfie Noakes, 67, who lives near the man’s house said: “Poor blighter, he dared question why they have the X Factor as headline news. Best keep your mouth shut. I love the X Factor I really do.”