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HomeMost PopularScientists Prove Jesus Walked with Dinosaurs

Scientists Prove Jesus Walked with Dinosaurs

PETERSBURG - Kentucky - A panel of prominent scientists and paleontologists have discovered new groundbreaking evidence that Jesus walked with dinosaurs.

Jesus and his disciples walked with dinosaurs 2000 years ago and the earth and universe are only 10,000 years old.

Independent scientists funded by the Christian Neocon Church of Kentucky have also discovered that Adam and Eve wore fashionable garments given by God. This goes against the grain of the popular belief that they wore leaves over their genitalia in the garden of Eden.

These are just some of the myriad of facts which have now been discovered to be true by the scientists working in tandem with archeologists all over America.

Evolution Myth

Professor Alan Johnsons from the University of Mobile, Alabama says: “Blasphemers and evolutionists deny the fact that humans and dinosaurs coexisted. This is not the true Christian path that God and Jesus wrote about.

Image courtesy Monty Propps

“Children and adults outside of America are indoctrinated with the false ‘belief’ that man did not co-exist with dinosaurs starting from early childhood with books that teach it.  It’s reinforced in their school systems, the media and the entertainment industry.

“God wrote in the bible that he created humans and dinosaurs on the same day. Jesus walked and talked with dinosaurs. He even had one as a pet sometimes – an Agilisaurus which he kept in his carpentry workshop. We have eyewitness accounts and scientific evidence about this, folks, and it’s all in the Bible.”

The scientific study was not only all encompassing with profound discoveries in three continents, but also took over twenty years of research to finally come up with definitive answers to everything.

George W Bush has even been named patron of the creationist movement and was last year honoured at Kentucky Fry University with a Masters in Young Earth Studies.

The University at Kentucky Fry has also discovered dinosaur footprints dated 2000 years ago alongside the footprints of man. This incredible discovery alone is enough to cement the theory.

It is hardcore discoveries like this and a dinosaur claw mark on the Turin Shroud which have proved evolutionists are wrong in every way.

More Great Bible Facts

– Jesus had pale white skin with blonde hair and blue eyes and this endeared him to his pet Agilisaurus

– There is evidence to suggest that Jesus and his disciples had mullet haircuts.

– The disciples of the messiah would often travel on the backs of large flying dinosaurs similar to the Rhambphorhynchus Anurognathus on their way to the sea of Galilee. The large flying reptile Pterosaurs are also mentioned from the teachings of the lord Jesus Christ himself when speaking with Nicodemus (Jn. 3:14).

– Noah’s Ark carried many dinosaurs including the Tyrannosaurus Rex and Brachiosaurus as well as tiny insects and bugs.

– Adam saved Eve from being eaten by a Carnotaurus one day and was rewarded with intercourse. This is how the human race initially multiplied.

– Only Americans who believe in Jesus walking with dinosaurs will be taken up to be with him and all his friends in heaven when the Rapture comes.

– According to a 2001 Gallup poll, about 59% of Americans believe that “God created humans and dinosaurs pretty much in their present form at one time within the last 10,000 years or so.”

– Another 27% believe that “human beings have developed over millions of years from less advanced forms of life, but God guided this process.” Only 14% believe that “human beings have developed over millions of years from less advanced forms of life, but God had no part in this process.”

Don’t forget to visit the Creation Museum in Kentucky which realistically brings the pages of the Bible to life. Designed by a former Universal Studios exhibit director, the museum is an informative haven for the whole family.

Collage courtesy: Francesca Berrini

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128 COMMENTS

  1. Understanding your delusion

    There is not a single piece of empirical evidence showing that God is real. There is a mountain of evidence showing that God is imaginary. God falls into the same category as Leprechauns. God is a completely imaginary, mythological being that springs from human imagination.

    In other words, Christianity is a delusion. Religion in general is a delusion.

    I understand that the word “delusion” is uncomfortable. However, it is the correct word in the English language to use. The dictionary defines “delusion” in the following way:

    A false belief strongly held in spite of invalidating evidence. [ref]
    The invalidating evidence is all around us. Chances are that you have known it for many years, but you have been unable to face the reality of the situation. In Chapter 27 we will discuss why it is so terrifying to face reality.

    If it is so obvious that God is imaginary, then why might half of the American population profess belief in God? We have asked this question throughout the book because the whole situation is profoundly strange. Why would we, as a species, create all of this mythology and nonsense over and over again through the millennia? We must do it for a reason.

    If we can understand the reasons and deal with them rationally rather than through the silliness and mythology that is religion, we actually can do ourselves a great deal of good.

    http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/

  2. The weak cannot believe only the strong believe in something that you cant see. That’s called faith right there bitches

  3. I am a Christian and even I can see the humor in this. Yes there are some really weird and nutty people in Christianity that will be greatly offended. There are also some weird and nutty people in the scientific community of which I am one of THOSE people as well. Christianity and science are not mutually exclusive. In fact Christianity and science work very well together. God is after all the one who created all these wonderful things that scientist figure out over time.

  4. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL …

    Wait … this isn’t the Onion?

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL …

    Dinosaurs would have EATEN Jesus and his disciples. There is a reason dinosaurs weren’t mentioned in the Bible. Humans hadn’t discovered their fossils yet. Had we the brain washing authors of the Bible would have included them in their fairytale.

    Hopefully someday people will wake up (long after I’m gone unfortunately) and realize John Lennon was correct when he wrote:

    Imagine there’s no heaven
    It’s easy if you try
    No hell below us
    Above us only sky
    Imagine all the people
    Living for today…

    • NOOOO because the dinos were herbivors. All their long sharp teeth were to aid them in eating those delicious apples.

  5. Wtf …total retards. Christianity is a plague on this planet and it’s slowly destroying itself think GOD!

  6. How does one go about enrolling as a student at Kentucky Fry University? I’d really like to find out the Colonel’s secret recipe! I’ll bet, oh! I’ll just best Jesus had something to do with those herbs and spices!

  7. Each religion has it’s purpose, this “god” is an entity that it used to correct us, it’s the same with talking a tree. You can’t just point out from a book people write years ago. There are other religions who said they create the world, and what do we do? This is religion, not something you can rely with science, use your bible to teach bad students not to correct science that you can really believe it if you perform a simple experiment. Next day you see Buddhist pointing dinosaurs are made out of flowers.

    • No, but there are other planets we can move those to who have no respect for this one. Several of ’em found so far. All of em *REALLY NICE AND EDEN-LIKE* if you get my drift..

  8. The Universe has encountered a problem and needs to close. We are sorry for the inconveinience. If the error persists, please contact your local drug dealer, or send an error report to God.

  9. Holy … cow! Has the "sapiens" in Homo sapiens been chucked altogether?
    I can't believe the ridiculous statements, silly arguments and hopeless replies around here.

  10. A friend of mine posted this on FB too. I was reading further for these interesting findings up until I read the "amazing biblical facts" did I suspect humor. Sure enough, this website is dedicated to satire. I had a great laugh.

  11. Whenever you have to choose between provable science and unprovable mythology, choose the science.

  12. Religion is retarded. It amazes me that people can encounter so much false information in the bible and still believe in god.

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