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Royal Experts: Why the Germans Are Rolling Red Carpet Out For Harry and Meghan

Mike Hunt
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Royal Experts: Why the Germans Are Rolling Red Carpet Out For Harry and Meghan

Red carpets, motorcades, police cordons, ministerial private jets, and all the other junk is being rolled out by the Germans for former royals, Harry and Meghan…but why?

John Fortington Fothering Fortingly Smythe, a royal expert, revealed the real reason for the sycophantic brown-nosing display towards the couple who supposedly left the royal family because they hated all the protocol and traditions of the Windsors.

“Simply put, by supporting Harry and Meghan who hate the UK along with its royal family, the Germans, who lead and control the EU, are displaying their extreme pleasure at this couple’s two fingers up to the UK. One must remember that woke communist politics is essentially an EU political ideology, where Marxism and collectivist communism go hand in hand.

“This is why the EU elevates Harry and Meghan even though they are mere z-list celebrities now with a shitty Netflix series that will no doubt cause more people to cancel their subscriptions.

“Anything that is against the UK, is good for the EU, and Harry along with his master, Meghan epitomises the EU’s hatred for anything British post Brexit. By parading these two grifters around and elevating them to royal status, the EU is basically saying ‘Fuck You UK’.

“Ironically, the British royal family are from the German Saxe-Coburg and Gotha royal lineage, and only changed their name to Windsor in 1917 to sound less German. One could postulate the Germans are showing hate towards their own repatriated royal family, but that is another conversation all together.

“So, there we have it. Because Germany is the de facto leader of the EU and controls everything about it, there is a desire post Brexit to show off Harry and Meghan as an additional kick in the gangoolies to the actual British royal family and the UK in general.”

EU Brexit punishment numero 3465

Cost of Living Crisis: Selling Your Kidney For the Weekly Shop

Mike Hunt
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Cost of Living Crisis: Selling Your Kidney For the Weekly Shop

Unfortunately, food is an essential part of survival and living creatures like humans need food. The question is, though, how can you purchase food from the shops if it is too expensive?

Marjorie Fentanilli, 46, from Streatham, London, recently solved the odious conundrum of buying her weekly shopping by selling her left kidney to a little Chinese man she met in an alley way on the way back from her local supermarket.

“I basically got to the checkout, and they blurted out an enormous price for the handful of goods I had on the checkout thingy. I had to leave all the shopping there and walk out. On the way home, I went through a dark alley way and I heard a Psssst sound. It was a little China man, and he said he could get me my weekly shopping no problem. Intrigued, I followed him to his home where he revealed that he could take out my left kidney and give me £350 for it. He assured me it wouldn’t be painful, and that way I could afford to eat for a few days.”

Mrs Fentanilli’s left kidney was removed, and the internal organ sent to China, where it will be sold to a rich Arab from Dubai or Saudi Arabia for hundreds of thousands of pounds in profit.

Capitalising on the cost of living crisis, there are many of these insidious Chinese operations being carried out across the UK.

“It was either I sell one of my kidneys or I take out one of those dodgy loans at 10,000% APR that no one can ever pay back. I chose to sell my kidney, pancreas and one of my lungs. At least this way, I can afford to eat for three weeks before I run out of money,” another organ donor revealed.

Unjustly Ousted Boris Leaves Number 10

Mike Hunt
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Unjustly Ousted Boris Leaves Number 10

He was the PM who finally got Brexit over the line despite 80% of parliament trying to thwart and eradicate the EU Referendum result of 2016. For that, Boris will be remembered as a heroic figure who fought tooth and nail to preserve Britain’s democracy despite the powers that tried with all their might to kill off the will of the people.

Despite apologising multiple times to the House and to the public regarding attending a staff leaving party during the Covid Lockdown, Boris was pilloried and ousted. The knives were out already and the Tory party was ready for a new leader.

The globe is on the cusp of a world war, and Boris would have been the ideal War Prime Minister, but such is the fickle nature of politics that the short-sighted denizens of plasticity always win in the end.

There is no looking at the big picture anymore in a political climate of soundbites and short term fixes.

As Liz Truss takes the reins of a considerably divided Tory party and Boris is free to do the rounds making serious cash with after dinner speeches or whatever opportunity arises, there is a sense that this fiasco was an unnecessary drawn out nightmare that could have been avoided.

Well, at least look on the bright side, Greasy Sunak is now relegated to the backbenches where he can comb his oily hair to his heart’s content, not ruining the economy any further or protecting the EU.

Portrait of Remona Lisa Goes Missing From Louvre

Mike Hunt
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Portrait of Remona Lisa Goes Missing From Louvre

The world renowned Remona Lisa portrait which many Remoaners cite as an iconic piece of art summing up their plight after Brexit has gone missing from the Louvre Museum in Paris.

Police commissioner, Gascon du Merde was adament that the priceless piece of Remoaner art will be found soon.

“We will search every part of Paris and France for this portrait until it is found. It is a very important piece of Remoaner art and exemplifies the folly of Brexit by the Rosbifs.”

Remoaners triggered

It is not known who took the painting or why it was pilfered from the Louvre, but some are suspecting a Brexiteer may have had something to do with it.

“The Remona Lisa exemplified the sadness of the Remoaners in leaving Europe. For them, to be part of a soviet collectivist bloc resembling the USSR was paramount to their general makeup and ideology. To be ordered around by unelected faceless autocrats in the EU Commission was a dream for these Remoaners. They do not value freedom, sovereignty or eventual riches that will occur with Brexit. Instead, under Brexit, every day is a moment of dire sadness where these Remoaners moan and moan on places like Twitter about how miserable they are. This is why the Remona Lisa portrait is such a terrible loss for them,” the Louvre Museum’s curator, Jean Michel Cochon revealed.

If anyone sees or hears about the Remona Lisa please contact the Louvre Museum directly.

Harry: “Dad, I’m Home Plus Brought the Wife”

Mike Hunt
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Harry: “Dad, I’m Home Plus Brought the Wife”

News from the palace is that when Harry and his wife announced an impromptu trip back to Britain, many senior royals were about as happy about the news as receiving a swift kick to the lower regions.

For two years now, this odious couple have been attacking the Windsors for monetary gain, and many are seeing the terrible toll on the Queen’s health. Prince Philip was offed by the constant nefarious Meghan Markle and Harry media attacks, and now it seems they have set their sights on the poor Queen.

“She cannae tak’ no more, captain,” a Scottish doctor who looks after the Queen’s ticker whilst in Balmoral revealed on Sunday.

No doubt, Harry and Meghan will be followed everywhere with a Netflix crew in tow, and this UK trip is purely opportunistic.

Meghan further kicked the royals in a recent magazine interview, where the deluded power-mad narcissist likened herself to Nelson Mandela.

The muzzled royals cannot, due to royal protocol, answer back directly to the constant attacks from this poisonous couple, so naturally every day involves bracing for more horrible attacks on the family.

The ultimate question is, of course, if Harry and Meghan hate the royals so much, why are they still touting their own so-called royal status? Well, money is the reason for that question, obviously. Without the Sussex title, they would not get as many dollars selling their duplicitous wares to dumb American executives

Many in the UK and now even in the US. are baffled as to why Harry and Meghan are not stripped of their titles once and for all?

Makita Tool Box: Based On Your Requirements

Mike Hunt
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Makita Tool Box: Based On Your Requirements

A high-quality Makita tool box is an excellent investment for true craftspeople. If you have special compact storage for the instruments, they will be concentrated in one location and neatly distributed into compartments. All of the small details are distributed in their proper places here, for example, by organizers integrated into the lid.

Tool storage from Makita

You can find any Makita box at a good price in our online store. There are large Makita stackable tool boxes in the catalog for storing small parts and fasteners. A strong handle for carrying the tool box is not the last role. A Makita tool box on wheels is a good option for storing large assembly instruments. The huge capacity of such plastic containers is an undeniable advantage. The internal compartment is not cluttered with extraneous protrusions that interfere with the tool’s location. Makita brand durable plastic organizers — the most well-known and authoritative global manufacturer of hand instruments and related products. Our inventory includes containers made of durable plastic with dependable locks.

Makita Tool Box

 

How to choose a tool box

Welcome to our online store if you are looking for a small organizer with fixed compartments or a large container. On Uk Planet Tools site you can find Black Friday deals on power tools and tools boxes of any kind.

Many factors influence the choice and purchase, including employment details, working conditions, workload, and so on. Keep in mind that the Makita tool box set must be large enough to hold all of your essential power devices.

These simple guidelines will assist you in your selection process:

  • Pay close attention to the bottom of the container;
  • The walls are next in line;
  • The lid serves two primary functions: protection against the ingress of various liquids or debris, and comfortable transportation;
  • Additional case functionality — various niches, compartments, and trays for folding small parts such as screws, bolts, nails, and so on;
  • Category, size and standard — final conditions.

Order the product based on your requirements. The purpose will determine whether the box is closed or open, large or small, with or without additional accessories.

Contact our consultants if you are unable to make a decision or if you require qualified advice. You can rely on us for practical advice on the selection, use, and maintenance of any product from our online catalog.

Do you require a portable tool box? Are you looking for the best way to store and transport frequently used hand tools? Call, come in, purchase, and enjoy!

Should We Be Celebrating the World’s Favourite Beer?

Mike Hunt
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Should We Be Celebrating the World’s Favourite Beer?

There’s long been conversations on what should and shouldn’t be celebrated in the media, and what can and can’t be advertised. For example, the promotion of cigarettes has long gone, with any form of advertising even removed from the labels.

Sports betting is following a similar pathway, and while in the USA more sports teams are seeking sponsorship from betting companies as laws are eased, the rest of the world are seemingly cutting down on how betting companies can or can’t operate, even preventing famous faces being associated with them.

And then there’s alcohol…

Alcohol advertising is somewhat limited. There are only particular times of the day, while gone are the days when companies could say anything like “Guinness is good for you”. But yet, anyone can be the face of a beer company, and adverts are always oozing style and sophistication, encouraging us to be that person by drinking that beer. And we all fall for it.

Today, the most popular beers in the world make for an interesting read, and by sales, it currently looks as follows:

1.Snow
2.Budweiser
3.Tsingtao
4.Bud Light
5.Skol
6.Heineken
7.Harbin
8.Yangjing
9.Corona
10.Coors Light

Interestingly, the Asian market has really taken off, with the likes of Snow and Harbin not readily available elsewhere in the world, while the likes of Heineken, Budweiser and Corona remain a constant.

But nowhere on Heineken or Carlsberg adverts do you see the health implications. Is it time that we should?

Rather than celebrating what is “probably the best beer in the world”, should governments be placing legislation in place to highlight the harm alcohol can do, just as cigarettes do?

How much do you love beer? Is it enough to develop liver disease or digestive problems? Is it enough to come home after a night in the pub and hit a partner? Because there are clear connections between the consumption of beer, or alcohol in general, and such instances.

There are certainly calls for how alcohol is marketed to be more stringent and much more in line with cigarettes and gambling, the latter of which is starting to get tighter as problem gambling continues to rise.

There has been a rise in people suffering with alcohol addiction too, though, and that can’t be ignored. Of course, that shouldn’t stop people enjoying a pint of beer, just as the tightening of gambling in many parts of the world shouldn’t stop people having a bet. But rather encouraging people to do so in moderation…

South Africans Liken Meghan Markle to Robert Mugabe NOT Nelson Mandela

Mike Hunt
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South Africans Liken Meghan Markle to Robert Mugabe NOT Nelson Mandela

Millions of outraged South Africans have flown into a rage after foot-in-mouth Meghan Markle likened herself to iconic South African freedom fighter — Nelson Mandela.

Many took to social media to voice their outrage this week.

Bandile Zadsisai, 26, from Cape Town wrote on his blog:

“She [Meghan Markle] is not welcome in South Africa anymore. When that didi malebe said she was like Nelson Mandela I spit my coffee all over the PC computer. Meghan Markle is more like Robert Mugabe. He was also a liar, a dictator and lived in mansions with 16 bathrooms just like Meghan. Mugabe would travel everywhere in a private jet and thought he was king of Africa!”

Others on social media were similarly outraged, and also cited deceased African dictator Robert Mugabe as more of an apt resemblance to Meghan Markle.

High School student, Amogelang Chidubem, 19, from Bloemfontein wrote on social media:

“Febeh Meghan Markle makes me physically want to vomit. The mampara come here with hundreds piece of luggage, and her staff of 30 including a team of people just to do her nasty toenails. Everywhere she goes there are 50 or so limousines and polluting SUV cars. She then says she is like Nelson Mandela the father of South Africa. She does not have one single gram of Mandela not one! We are now saying she is more like Robert Mugabe who bankrupted his country because of his own greed for power and money. Meghan Markle is a tikiline zhulingu Robert Mugabe living in his palaces! Go to hell GOLO Markle do not come back here ever again!”

There was no answer yet from Meghan Markle’s extensive team of PR and propaganda teams to the angry South African reactions.

Why China Reselling Russian Gas to EU Makes a Mockery of Sanctions

Mike Hunt
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Why China Reselling Russian Gas to EU Makes a Mockery of Sanctions

What use are sanctions on Russia when all the gas is doing is going around the world, then eventually returning to the EU?

“It’s a round trip gas bubble about to burst. The Russians sell the gas to the Chins. Then they increase the price substantially and ship it to the EU from China at a massive markup. But, hey, at least the EU can say it is not buying Russian gas then, even though it is,” Xing Xong Wong, a gas tanker captain said as he set off for another long shipment to the EU.

Meanwhile, in Paris and Berlin, many officials were extremely quiet as hundreds of ships have been ferrying Russian gas to the EU. In Athens, they’re also counting their ill-gotten gains because business has been very good for the Greek oil and gas freight ships ferrying Russian gas to the EU.

“Well, what is the problem? It may have started off as Russian gas, but when it went to China it was renamed as Chinese gas,” a fat Greek oil magnate revealed from his yacht in the Aegean.

Naturally, all these roundabout trips across thousands of miles of ocean must be doing some serious damage to the environment. Where is Greta Thunberg now?

Thanks to the EU and China, Russia is being supported financially and is rearming its military, despite with alleged heavy losses in the battlefields of Ukraine. Instead of being dependent on Russia for gas, Europe is now becoming dependent on Beijing instead for its energy — which is still Russian gas, only this time imported from China.

As Joe Biden sleeps and farts in his bed — China and Russia are laughing themselves all the way to the bank.

What we just wrote above is not happening, you did not see that…shhhh…the EU is silent as well…it is not happening.

Meghan Markle Features in American Magazine The Cu*t

Mike Hunt
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Meghan Markle Features in American Magazine The Cu*t

It’s a hard life, while people around the world are suffering and in the UK millions will have to make a choice between heating themselves or feeding their children this winter, along comes The Cu*t — and Meghan Markle moaning about how hard her life is living in a 16-bathroom Monticito McMansion. What an utter cu*t, you may utter under your breath.

Cu*t featured in The Cu*t magazine

Meghan Markle has been complaining again, this time in some tiresome soporific shallow magazine called The Cu*t.

“I have 16 bathrooms and 19 bedrooms in this awful McMansion….yadda yadda yadda….woke word salad….race card….yadda yadda yadda…n-word…..yadda yadda yadda….sustainable coffee…etc., etc.”

Next week in The Cu*t Meghan Markle continues moaning about even more ridiculous crap in her privileged life of fake virtue signalling perpetual victimhood. Be sure to read the next episode in the continuing saga — either that or watch wet paint dry. It is infinitely more interesting.

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