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2 Tips for Those Who Struggle in the Kitchen

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ADHD (and other types of executive dysfunction) can be difficult to manage, especially when it comes to eating, preparing food, and washing up. Just the thought of having to deal with this task can feel overwhelming – even before you have opened the fridge to take your eighth look inside, hoping different options will appear out of the blue.

If this sounds familiar to you, this piece is here to help. It is going to discuss some top kitchen tips for those with executive dysfunction issues to help make mealtimes that much more manageable.

Get With the Gadgets

chopper kitchenCertain kitchen gadgets can make life easier, especially when they can take away the majority of the burden when preparing food. For example, choppers are an excellent tool to use to help cut up vegetables and fruits, which otherwise could take up a lot of time and energy. Many choppers now have been devised to cut up all kinds of different foods with just one chop – leaving them ready for you to eat or do whatever you need to do with them.

Other gadgets that might be useful to include, an air fryer, a slow cooker, and of course, a dishwasher. Air fryers not only use a lot less electricity than conventional electric ovens, but they also have even easier operational instructions. You can simply put many different foods in without needing to preheat, and they are cooked sometimes within half the time that a conventional oven would do. This is great for those who are short on time, or find themselves not hungry after preparing a meal for a long time.

Also, you can get a dishwasher, as this can make the world of different to dishes piling up in the sink, which can often become a problem for those with executive dysfunction.

Go One-Use (Yes, Really)

pizzaIn a world where one-use plastic is frowned upon, it can be difficult to talk yourself into using this as a technique. However, if this is the difference between you eating and you not eating, then always choose the former. It is easy to get hold of paper plates and bowls that you can throw away afterwards if washing up is too much – but did you know, you can also bulk buy items that are eco-friendly and biodegradable, such as pizza boxes, hot and cold food containers, coffee cups, and more? This can make the opportunities endless for meal prep, eating when you have low energy, or are unable to do the dishes – and can make life just that little bit easier.

Executive dysfunction is extremely common. Up to 80% of women with autism alone are said to experience it. There is nothing to be embarrassed about and there are ways to make life more manageable, so you can enjoy a better quality of life. It is important to remember you are not alone, and to do whatever helps.

Britons Fight Against Lower Taxes

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How dare you have lower taxes in Britain. This is an absolute outrage, and something that has never been witnessed in all of British history.

“We will fight any form of tax cut in Britain because it is simply against our nature. I am disgusted at these people who actually want to grow the economy by reducing taxes and making things easier for people,” one outraged fellow revealed, shouting in the streets of London.

The Bank of England immediately increased interest rates because the government had dared to cut taxation.

BoE boss, Rupert Idiote, was furious about the entire debacle and was now out to punish not only the ‘growth economy’ but ordinary people by increasing interest rates again.

“This is an absolute outrage. Lower taxes for people and businesses? By Jove, we shall increase interest rates so far up their mortgaged arses they will be shitting bricks. See how you like that fuckers? My bosses in Brussels would not like lower taxes in the UK.”

Such was the vitriol and market reaction by the morons in the City to lower taxation that the entire UK economy went up in flames.

The pound sank, the interest rates rose and the flames of anger exploded around everywhere.

Never lower taxes. The British are simply not used to such things. It’s back to high tax misery for you bastards. For gawd’s sake, keep on increasing taxes so that everyone is happy with their wretched lives again.

Tora Tora Tora KamiKwasi Kwarteng Suicidal Economic Nosedive U-Turn

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It was one last cocktail party with his City highflier and hedge fund manager bosses before Kamikwasi Kwarteng plopped himself into his Zero.

“There will be no humiliating U-turns with my 45p tax ruling, or will there? Oh shit, once the plane (economy) goes into a nosedive, forget about pulling up! Banzai! Tora Tora Tora!”

Yes, Admiral Truss has demanded a full attack on the economy to sink as many friendly ships as possible.

As KamiKwasi Kwarteng flew into the dawn sun, he had a big grin on his face, this was a one way trip, and certainly not a U-turn, or was it?

Top 4 Functions Growing SMBs Should Outsource

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Small to medium-sized businesses have one thing in common, they all want to increase revenue and grow their enterprise. Although outsourcing services might seem viable for large organisations only, SMBs can benefit vastly from outsourcing certain business functions too. By passing the torch over to a specialist company, you can focus your attention on your areas of expertise. You can also rest assured that an experienced, expert third party completes the outsourced functions to a high standard. Here are four functions growing SMBs should consider outsourcing.

web design

1. Web Design

No matter what industry your business is in or what service or product you sell, every business needs a professional business website. A website can be used as a point of reference for your products or services. It is a great place to access business details and can be used as an e-shop. Small to medium-sized enterprises who have no clue about web design can benefit from the services of an experienced web design team. Creating your own website might seem easy, but building a fully functional business site that is finished, tested, and scalable is not easy. Employing a third-party vendor to help you with this aspect of your business can get your brand out to more people and boost your sales.

digital marketing2. Digital Marketing

Digital marketing can transform SMBs by building brand awareness and strengthening their online presence. You can increase profitability and revenue by exposing your brand to your target audience online. As with website creation and design, digital marketing functions might seem like a cinch. However, taking the DIY approach can be both timely and costly. Not to mention, there may be some trial and error without any expertise in this field. A digital marketing company can help you create a strong strategy and execute campaigns without wasting any time.

human resources3. Human Resources

Human resources revolve around the employees of a company, and functions include payroll, training, recruitment, onboarding, and employee relations. As an SMB owner, you might not think you need extra help for these services. However, HR services can take a long time to complete, and it would be a complete waste of resources if you, or a member of your existing team, attempted to take them on. An external HR consultant can help your business processes run smoothly and can help keep your employees happy in the workplace.

IT4. IT

Statistics show that 7 in 10 businesses within the UK outsource to third-party companies, and 34 percent of these businesses outsource IT support. Nowadays, most companies are connected in some way, no matter what they specialise in. In turn, these companies require IT support. As the owner of a small to medium-sized business, you probably won’t have an IT technician on the payroll. Rather than investing in a permanent IT department, employing a managed services provider is much more budget-friendly. A third-party vendor can help you with your specific IT needs as and when you need them.

The Daily Squib Anthology Book Now For Sale

As the editor of the Squib, I can proudly announce that The Daily Squib Anthology From 2007 to 2022 is finally for sale.

Since founding the Daily Squib on April 1st 2007, many changes have taken place on the internet and indeed the globe. This is why this carefully curated anthology encapsulates those changes in a satirical manner. Fifteen years of different presidents, prime ministers, wars, peace and a myriad of little societal nuances that made up that period of history.

Looking for that curious unique gift for dad’s Christmas stocking, or something to read while taking the dump of the century in your toilet, the Daily Squib Anthology is the perfect celebration of our times, good and bad?

Come, join the circus, look at the clowns and listen to the troubadours as they usher in a new era for humanity, horrific yet beautiful at the same time, a glowing paradoxical dystopian paradise entrenched in reality show hell and fake celebrity appearances. All manner of fantastic beasts projectile vomiting over everything daringly encapsulating this curious rare book compiled with the indomitable spirit of Juvenalis in mind, but furnished within a modern 21st century outlook.

A bold erupting satisfying fart into the darkest and illuminating facets of humanity’s wonders, The Daily Squib Anthology is now available to buy direct from the publisher or from Amazon, or from any good bookshop.

Get your copy now, the first 150 are signed by the author.

The book will only be released in paperback.

UPDATE 2025: THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY IS NOW DOWN TO ONLY A FEW REMAINING COPIES IN PRINT. YOU CAN PURCHASE ONE OF THE LAST SIGNED COPIES HERE.

daily squib book signed

5 Tips on How to Deal With Forced Gender Woke Ideology

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The public are truly fed up of having gender and Woke Marxist ideology constantly stuffed down their throats. This nefarious destabilising demoralising off shoot of Marxism is now constantly fed through all media channels, schools, universities, advertising and corporations.

Woke and gender ideology is a technique utilised to demoralise the West and was created by CCP intelligence agents over a decade ago during the Obama administration. The intent is to align the West with Communist Chinese Maoist Marxist ideology, as well as bring an era of communist censorship. Yes, we already know that trans people are humans, and all races are part of the human race. This has been known for some time, and we do not need to have it shoved down our throats constantly. Through the use of cancel culture and mass censorship employed by Silicon Valley controlling conglomerates, all prior societal norms are censored and only Woke/Gender theory are accepted.

So, how does one survive this onslaught? If everyone followed these tips, then the constant attacks could be alleviated for some time at least.

vote democrat 2020 pollsters
The Democrat Party under Joe Biden and Kamala Harris is associated with riots, looting, arson, gender woke ideology, China, communism, Marxism and corruption

1. Do not let your children attend any educational establishment that pushes gender woke theory. Do not teach at such an establishment or be employed in any capacity within those places.

2. Boycott all films, series, film companies, music, advertising agencies, TV shows, books, art, news organisations that deploy gender woke ideology.

3. Do not vote for any political candidate in any capacity that is pushing Marxist CCP aligned gender woke theory.

4. Never fall into the trap of discussing or debating the concept because not only are the agents who constantly deploy their gender woke theory completely brainwashed with the Marxist theory, but you may get cancelled by the internet mobs that will be set upon your person. Just pretend it does not exist, and this should alleviate the problem.

5. Finally, live your life. They want to disrupt your life, they want to demoralise you, they want to cancel you for not adopting their communist Marxist gender woke ideology. They want to divide people, to disintegrate society, kill democracy, destroy Western civilisation and mould it into their deranged totalitarian regime of communistic conformity. Simply don’t let them. Live your life away from them. If you see or hear them, just turn it off, move away, avoid.

Five Tips to Relieve Stress

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Stress is something that many individuals experience. Several aspects of daily life can increase stress levels, including work, family problems, health issues, and financial responsibilities. Chronic stress raises your chance for illnesses like cardiovascular disease, anxiety, and depression. Thus, it is essential to understand how to manage stress to improve one’s quality of life. Below are some tips to relieve stress.

Exercise regularly

Moving your body may benefit you if you’re feeling stressed. Regular exercise has been demonstrated to reduce anxiety and depression. Start with easy activities like walking or biking if you are currently inactive. You may improve the likelihood of continuing exercising over time by picking one you enjoy.

Vitamins, minerals, and other supplements are helpful

Vitamins and minerals are vital for the body’s ability to respond to stress and control mood. Having insufficient amounts of both may damage one’s mental health and capacity to handle stress, so it’s essential to make sure that you get enough each day.
Aside from supplements, CBD flower can potentially help you feel less restless and reduce anxiety. Some hemp varieties may make you feel euphoric and relax your nerves, which may – should this happen – boost your daily life.

Eat a balanced diet

Every area of overall health, including mental health, is hugely influenced by food. Chronic stress may cause overeating and leaning toward extremely appetising foods, both of which can be detrimental to general well-being and disposition.

The lack of nutrients like B vitamins and magnesium, that are essential in the control of stress and mood, may increase your risk of nutritional deficiencies. To ensure that your body receives the proper nutrition, you should limit the amount of highly processed beverages and meals and increase your consumption of whole foods like vegetables, fruits, and fish.

Self-care is essential

Making time for yourself each day could help you feel less stressed. Walking outside, reading a great book, getting a massage, and doing yoga are some examples of self-care activities. Self-care has been linked to reduced stress levels and better quality of life, whereas neglecting your needs increases the likelihood of stress and burnout. Self-care doesn’t have to be complicated. It simply means taking care of your happiness and well-being.

Deep breathing exercises

When you are under mental stress, your sympathetic nervous system is activated, putting your body into a fight-or-flight response. Stress hormones cause the body to respond by speeding up respiration, the heartbeat, and blood vessel constriction. The parasympathetic nervous system, which governs the relaxation response, may be activated with deep breathing techniques.

Exercises for deep breathing include breathing through the diaphragm, the abdomen, the belly, and at a set rate. Deep breathing aims to slow down and deepen your breathing by bringing your consciousness to it. Deep inhalations through the nose cause your abdomen to rise and your lungs to expand fully. Your heart rate will slow down, as a result, making you feel calm.

Stress is an inevitable part of life, and it has a negative impact on your physical and mental health if it persists. The good thing is that these techniques can assist you in reducing stress and enhancing your overall health.

Bye, Bye NHS !

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In years to come, you will sigh as you say ‘remember the NHS‽’ it will be a distant memory, something cast to the farther reaches of the mind. Some will have fond memories of ye olde National Health Service, others will not.

In true human tradition, anything that is inherently good and supposedly free in this world is eventually abused, corrupted, violated, and plundered.

The NHS was a socialist utopian dream that was not free, though. The money to pay for it had to come from somewhere. Socialists firmly believe that there is a magical socialist money tree somewhere that bears 100 pound notes as fruit for eternity. Yes, it is a lovely thought, but reality is not something socialism as a political ideology close to communism is aware of.

socialist utopia hyperinflation

The Labour government of Attlee, who created the NHS, did not factor in an NHS used by half the earth’s population. Beveridge, who designed the NHS and Benefits system, actually was a eugenicist who stipulated that anyone who received benefits from the state should be sterilised. His lofty thoughts on that matter were unfortunately never adopted.

You see, the NHS as a system can function beautifully within a parameter where the nation’s population is relatively low, but it cannot function where the population is massively enlarged, and mainly consisting of non tax paying perpetually unemployed people.

There is no solution to a hugely oversubscribed entity bleeding money through terminal mismanagement and needless waste apart from complete collapse.

You may think things are all right when you eventually get a phone consultation with a GP in three weeks time, but your three-week wait and two minute rushed phone consultation is a very pertinent sign that all is not well in the NHS. In the 1950s, if you revealed that things would be like that in 2022, they would laugh at you.

Decades of unfettered mass migration into the UK from the world’s poorest countries encouraged by socialists effectively killed off their own socialist NHS dream. Prime Ministers like Tony Blair opened the floodgates into Britain, and the country is paying for this now as the people who came over were not rocket scientists, IT professionals or doctors, they were predominantly uneducated useless economic migrants from the poorest EU countries looking for British benefits…i.e the same sort of people coming over in dinghies from France every day by the thousand.

Okay, in defence of the likes of Blair and the socialists, their overall plan was to gain votes for elections by simply importing them into the country by the million, however with this strategy they did not realise they would not only overload the benefits system, but they would kill off their sacrosanct socialist project — the NHS. Finis!

New Chancellor: “I Think I Pressed the Wrong Button. Sorry!”

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The new Chancellor of the Exchequer, Kwasi Kwarteng today conceded that he may have made a little mistake with his new budget.

“Er, I was never very good at maths at school. I don’t even know what 7 x 4 is … (clacking on calculator) … oh, that’s what it is. Anyway, er…I think I owe everyone who is going to lose their home, their business and their entire livelihood an apology. As for the NHS, that’s fucked as well. By next week, you won’t have a pension, a home and an NHS. Oops!”

How did all of this happen?

Apparently Kwasi Kwarteng, who is barely literate or numerate, pressed the wrong button for the economy.

“They told me to go in a room where there were all these buttons and lights flashing on and off. To be honest, it all confused me. Liz had told me to press a certain button, but I am not sure I pressed it because I tripped up, and my arm fell on a panel with multiple buttons. Was it the red button, or the yellow flashing one, or maybe the green one? Oh dear, dearie me!”

Don’t forget to vote Tory next election.

Woman Gave Meghan Markle £5 During Royal Walkabout

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Darlene Mucklespout, 43, from Colchester gave Meghan Markle a £5 note while she was on a rare walkabout with other royals after the Queen’s death, it has been reported.

“I heard that Meghan was surprised that she did not get paid for greeting crowds of people whilst in Australia, so I waved a crisp five pound note in her face when she came up to me in the crowd.”

According to Darlene and other onlookers Meghan Markle’s eyes immediately lit up like a pair of newly drafted Russian soldiers both simultaneously stepping on a landmine just after arriving in Ukraine.

“Meghan quickly grabbed the fiver and told me that she does not get out of bed for less than $2.5 million, but on this occasion she would take my money. She literally grabbed it and said ‘gives me that’ which took me off guard. We were all gobsmacked. Me gran, Ada who was in a wheelchair took out a ten penny piece and threw it at Meghan. It fell on the pavement but this did not stop the greedy wife of Prince Harry from scrabbling around on all fours to pick it up to stash in her $12,000 purse.”

Cost of living crisis? Not for some it seems …