LONDON – England – A feminist has made a radical discovery that could change everything for feminists everywhere.
It had to happen sooner or later. Feminists all over the world have discovered the terrible truth about their pet hobby of Feminism.
Angie Hairspout, a devout feminist writer discovered the reality about feminism whilst researching her next article on how terrible men are.
Been played all along
“I was in the British library looking through some manuscripts when I found something from the 1920s. It was written by a man and outlined a plan to create a feminist movement so that women could get out of the kitchen and contribute to the economy. You see before feminism, us women were waited on hand and foot by men who provided for us and cared for us. We didn’t have to work but this was not good for the economy. I mean how can you have one half of the population sitting idle at home? Therefore they devised a plan to make it look like we were empowered, they even gave us the vote and told us to go to work. During World War II, we really came into our own as we worked in the factories making armaments for the men getting shot at on the front. After the war ended it was plain sailing and the men in charge knew we were ready for the economy as a whole and that’s when we were given the green light to contribute to the economy. Haven’t looked back since. We’re wage slaves fuelled by the media dangling a carrot in front of us telling us we have to buy the latest consumerist ‘it’ thing. Now I was really angry, because I saw the last paragraph. It said it was imperative that women never find out the truth about the whole situation because they might want to go back to the sweet old home life again, and this was a very dangerous situation because it would mean that men would have to do all the work again. I was so angry that I went up to the male librarian and kicked him in the nut sack telling him I was going home to sew a woolly jumper you patriarchal gob shite.”
Ms Hairspout has vowed to publish the incredible discovery in her new book “Why Work When You Can Have Fun at Home”
All across the world women are discovering their womanhood again.
“I realised today that I am a woman. I have fundamental differences to men. My brain is wired differently to the male brain plus I have some great looking mammary glands and different parts down there. I demand that I go back to being a woman again and not trying to act like a man or try to be better than a man. No more working to the bone and losing my hair for me. I want to nurture my natural female motherly instinct to raise a family instead of ultimately ruining society’s family unit,” Jane Servisse, a former feminist told Cosmopolitan magazine.