Jesus riding a dinosaur
PETERSBURG – Kentucky – A panel of prominent scientists and paleontologists have discovered new groundbreaking evidence that Jesus walked with dinosaurs.
Jesus and his disciples walked with dinosaurs 2000 years ago and the earth and universe are only 10,000 years old.
Independent scientists funded by the Christian Neocon Church of Kentucky have also discovered that Adam and Eve wore fashionable garments given by God. This goes against the grain of the popular belief that they wore leaves over their genitalia in the garden of Eden.
These are just some of the myriad of facts which have now been discovered to be true by the scientists working in tandem with archeologists all over America.
Professor Alan Johnsons from the University of Mobile, Alabama says: “Blasphemers and evolutionists deny the fact that humans and dinosaurs coexisted. This is not the true Christian path that God and Jesus wrote about.
|Image courtesy Monty Propps|
“Children and adults outside of America are indoctrinated with the false ‘belief’ that man did not co-exist with dinosaurs starting from early childhood with books that teach it. It’s reinforced in their school systems, the media and the entertainment industry.
“God wrote in the bible that he created humans and dinosaurs on the same day. Jesus walked and talked with dinosaurs. He even had one as a pet sometimes – an Agilisaurus which he kept in his carpentry workshop. We have eyewitness accounts and scientific evidence about this, folks, and it’s all in the Bible.”
The scientific study was not only all encompassing with profound discoveries in three continents, but also took over twenty years of research to finally come up with definitive answers to everything.
George W Bush has even been named patron of the creationist movement and was last year honoured at Kentucky Fry University with a Masters in Young Earth Studies.
The University at Kentucky Fry has also discovered dinosaur footprints dated 2000 years ago alongside the footprints of man. This incredible discovery alone is enough to cement the theory.
It is hardcore discoveries like this and a dinosaur claw mark on the Turin Shroud which have proved evolutionists are wrong in every way.
More Great Bible Facts
– Jesus had pale white skin with blonde hair and blue eyes and this endeared him to his pet Agilisaurus.
– There is evidence to suggest that Jesus and his disciples had mullet haircuts.
– The disciples of the messiah would often travel on the backs of large flying dinosaurs similar to the Rhambphorhynchus Anurognathus on their way to the sea of Galilee. The large flying reptile Pterosaurs are also mentioned from the teachings of the lord Jesus Christ himself when speaking with Nicodemus (Jn. 3:14).
– Noah’s Ark carried many dinosaurs including the Tyrannosaurus Rex and Brachiosaurus as well as tiny insects and bugs.
– Adam saved Eve from being eaten by a Carnotaurus one day and was rewarded with intercourse. This is how the human race initially multiplied.
– Only Americans who believe in Jesus walking with dinosaurs will be taken up to be with him and all his friends in heaven when the Rapture comes.
According to a 2001 Gallup poll, about 59% of Americans believe that “God created humans and dinosaurs pretty much in their present form at one time within the last 10,000 years or so.”
Another 27% believe that “human beings have developed over millions of years from less advanced forms of life, but God guided this process.” Only 14% believe that “human beings have developed over millions of years from less advanced forms of life, but God had no part in this process.”
Don’t forget to visit the Creation Museum in Kentucky which realistically brings the pages of the Bible to life. Designed by a former Universal Studios exhibit director, the museum is an informative haven for the whole family.
Collage courtesy: Francesca Berrini