17.7 C
Thursday, June 13, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldHow to Make $5 Million in a Year Without a Single Day...

How to Make $5 Million in a Year Without a Single Day of Work

NEW YORK - USA - Ever wanted to make a cool $5 million a year and not have to do a single day of work? We will show you how.

Making money comes easy for some, and for others, not so easy. I am going to tell you a story about a man who made $5 million in a single year and teach you how you too could do the same thing. In fact, this is so easy that you will be truly astounded.

Firstly, you do not need a business, you do not have to break your back in some routine soulless fucking job. You do not need to work in some garish office or slave away on a building site lugging bricks up and down a gnarly old ladder.

You do not have to collect mundane objects, chewing gum wrappers or matchboxes hoping that one day in a hundred years they may have some value.

You do not have to invent the square wheel…again, or some sort of newfangled gadget that is then manufactured en masse in a Chinese communist slave factory.

You do not have to come up with the only vaccine for some deadly virus or disease, then sell it to governments for huge prices.

How about writing that one hit song that goes down in the annals of rock’n’roll as the greatest song ever written, making you millions? No, you don’t have to be some performing monkey and do tedious MTV interviews with some brain-dead lobotomised pop DJ or do any circus tricks.

Forget about writing that special app that is downloaded by gazillions of paying people, or starting the next Facebook or Twitter. Every angle has now been covered, and the market is completely oversaturated as well as shot.

Here’s the clincher, none of that crap is needed if you want to make a cool five million bucks per year, you see it’s all down to one single thing and that thing is a very special commodity that was first possibly conceptualised in Sumerian times approximately 7,500 years ago.

Now, the pièce de résistance! Yes, that little thing that you need, well … Forget about working for a living or doing any other useless nonsensical shit. The key to making $5 million per annum is really a very simple thing. It’s called already having shedloads of money in the first place, call it inheritance, or some lucky mega payoff, and of course, lest we forget, a teensy $71,428,571.43 in the bank at a special rate of 7%.

Money makes money, and that’s called interest. One does not need to undertake any action other than depositing the funds into an exclusive bank account for the privileged that is reserved for a select group of individuals, and one can generate a staggering $5 million dollars annually for doing absolutely nothing.

Disclaimer: This should not be considered as financial advice in any way, even though it is completely true that to make real money, you need shitloads of money in the first place and should be preferably born into it.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"


  1. Hello I am a hacker on the Dark Web. You can find me if you do a search for Groq Marketplace search 4 Dualiszt8

    If you want money I can hack into any bank account and siphon off the balance to an anonymous account in the Bahamas. Just tell me how much money you need and I can do it for a small fee.

    Remember Dualiszt8


    My name is Aziz Badawi, I’m 27 year old man from Palestine. Our town has recently evacuated due
    to bombardments by Israel, now I am staying at a shelter with my 6 year old daughter Nadia. My wife is
    dead and I’m the only one left to take care of my daughter as we are not allowed to depart to my parents house
    in Nablus, she is sick with a congenital heart defect and I have no way to afford the medicine she needs anymore.
    People here at the shelter are much in the same conditions as ourselves…

    I’m looking for a kind soul who can help us with a donation, any amount will help even 1$ we will
    save money to get her medicine, the doctor at the shelter said if I can’t find a way to get her the
    medication she needs her little heart may give out during the coming weeks.

    If you wish to help me and my daughter please make any amount donation in bitcoin cryptocurrency
    to this bitcoin wallet: bc1qcfh092j2alhswg8jr7fr7ky2sd7qr465zdsrh8

    If you cannot donate please forward this message to your friends, thank you to everyone who’s helping me and my daughter.

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -





The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »