17.7 C
London
Monday, March 18, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldWoman Caught Covid From Farting Man

Woman Caught Covid From Farting Man

LONDON - England - A woman has revealed that she was infected by Covid after a man farted in her presence in a supermarket.

buy squib book

A Pimlico woman, 43, caught Covid on Tuesday when a man farted in her presence whilst shopping in her Sainsburys local store.

“I had just picked up an aubergine when I heard the ripper fart. At first I thought someone had dropped a shopping basket on the floor when I smelled the fart smell. I did not have a mask on at the time, and my mouth was open, so the fart went in there as well. I rushed home in shock, two days later I tested positive for Covid.”

Dr. Ranjit Gupta, a Covid-19 expert, explains how the fart may have infected the woman.

“When a fart is expelled from the anus, methane gas mixed with other gut particles and miniscule droplets of water and faeces dissipate over a large area. Farting with gusto, or maybe just a little squeaker can affect the amount of material expelled from the anus. If in an enclosed space, a fart can be more pervasive and hang around the atmosphere for longer. I had a vindaloo last night and I think I may fart right now, excuse me *parp*!”

Farting is like coughing, but from the other end, so beware of those farts.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -
daily squib FB Group
daily squib FB Group
daily squib FB Group
daily squib FB Group

NEWS ON THE HOUR

curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »