Euro Will Only Work If Britain Is Head of Single EU Government

LONDON - England - The European project can only work if the UK is at the forefront of the single currency and EU government.

“We will not join unless we are given the post at the head of the table,” British PM, David Cameron told the Daily Mail today.

EU politicians have conceded that the UK is a special case that will have to be treated with care when handled.

“The EU will not survive unless we have the UK as part of the eurozone, and the way to entice them into the single currency is by waving the carrot of regency in front of their noses. If they think they are so important, they can join and we can make them feel important. Such is the ‘superior’ stance of the British, they treat Europe like a self-service buffet restaurant, where they come and take what they want then go back to their little island. So, comrades, it is apparent to me that we need to dupe these people with a sense of importance that they think they deserve. We suckered all the other countries to join, so the UK will be the last bastion of the European superstate,” an unnamed, unelected EU bureaucrat told Euronews Daily.

The previous Labour government paved the way for the EU British euro inclusion with the mass immigration program that has changed the face of Britain forever. They also tied the government to treaties in the EU forcing the UK to shore up the crumbling eurozone with billions of British pounds.

Speaking from parliament, a former Labour cabinet member admitted that its policies were a godsend to Brussels.

“Tony Blair’s and Gordon Brown’s policies were to weaken the UK to such a level that in the future there will be no choice but to join the euro. As for David Cameron, he promised the people a referendum on Europe before he was elected, he reneged on this promise for a very good reason, his EU bosses have his hands tied, and they promise him great riches if he pulls the final plug on the UK. Britain will be sold off, as easily as the UK’s gold reserves were sold off at the bottom of the market by Gordon Brown. We brought in millions of immigrants from the poorest countries in Eastern Europe and Asia, because we knew that it will be perfect preparation for the final solution for Britain. You cannot have an EU entry for the UK with a united Britain, with families together and the indigenous populations intact. Without the family units, without the jobs, without the cohesive togetherness of a population, they are free to be corrupted by the EU. Divide and conquer, this time used on the populations of Britain instead of colonial populations, will weaken resistance to the inevitable assimilation into the eurozone. This technique, has of course been utilised for centuries by many who wanted to weaken populations. The Labour party should be applauded for its positive EU stance and its primary role in bringing the UK into the euro. We have laid the groundwork, David Cameron will finish what we started, as you all know, we all work for the same boss. He will give the people no choice but to join the euro currency.”