Captain of Doomed Italian Cruise Liner Abandoned Ship Before Passengers

GIGLIO - Italy - Captain Silvio Berlusconi was said to have been conducting a Bunga Bunga orgy just before the Italian cruise ship crashed onto rocks.

“He was even ordering cocktails and eating olives off the naked bodies of dozens of young ladies as the ship lurched sideways and was evidently sinking,” one of the waiters on the ship told Rai Uno.

The good ship Italia had its hull ripped to shreds when it hit the rocks after getting perilously too close to the shoreline.

“The captain ordered us to get closer to the shore, because he said there was a girl with big breasts he wanted to see. How could we refuse such an order,” the captain’s deputy, told Italian reporters.

As soon as the captain realised that the ship Italia was doomed, Berlusconi ordered his troupe of Bunga Bunga women onto a lifeboat and abandoned ship leaving the rest of the crew and passengers to fend for themselves.