Sarkozy Cursed by Gypsies

PARIS - France - President Nicolas Sarkozy was today attending a special service at a synagogue to try and reverse the gypsy curse put on his head last week.

Rabbi Chaim Shalott, has told of the grievous harm this gypsy curse has inflicted on the ailing Sarkozy: “He is a broken man. This gypsy curse has not only reduced his confidence but it has also reduced his already shrivelled genitals to an even more wilted state. We have tried every cure in the book, but he has a curse on him and I don’t think he’s going to pull through it. But please, don’t tell him that, OK?”

‘Reichsangehöriger

Since receiving the curse after the mass expulsions of Roma gypsies last week, the president was nowhere to be seen and was not even in attendance at the Elysee palace.

“Carla has tried to help him, but her schedule with other men is very hectic so even when she can fit little Nicolas into her time slot, she stays about 20 feet away from him because she thinks that gypsy curses are contagious,” a palace aide told Le Figaro.

There are fears for France as a nation as well. How can a country function properly with a midget imbecile as their head who now has a gypsy curse on his soul?

Justice Minister Michele Alliot-Marie told the Senate on Thursday that because of the grave nature of the curse on president Sarkozy there may have to be emergency measures wherein the president would be required to step down and an immediate election be held for the sake of France.