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LONDON - England - Voters for the 2015 General Election will have the choice of voting for one party, political pundits have proclaimed.
EASTLEIGH - England - The Conservative party have invented the first ever invisibility cloak which they used successfully yesterday to put all their votes in the by-election.
LONDON - England - The former Secretary of State for Work and Pensions, Iain Duncan Smith, who was unceremoniously sacked from his post on Friday, will start a new scheme that he helped set up during his tenure in the Cabinet.
BIRMINGHAM - England - Speaking at the Conservative party's conference, prime minister David Cameron told everyone that he would agree to the British people having a referendum on a referendum of a possible referendum about a referendum for Britain's EU membership some time eventually in the distant far future.
LONDON - England - A man who walked in to the Treasury building in May 2010 claiming to be a Tory Chancellor of the Exchequer has admitted that he made the whole thing up.
LONDON - England - National Archive papers released today show Margaret Thatcher and her cabinet would have scouser fancy dress days in 1981.