New UK Health Plan Urges People to Die Younger

LONDON - England - Health Insurers and professionals in Britain are now urging people to die younger. Because of the poor quality of life in the UK, people are preferring death over life in Britain today.

What with soaring council taxes, fuel taxes, food costs, heating increases, no security and a dismal pension to live on, people across Britain have a bleak existence ahead of them.

Some UK Health Services are advising their clients to die earlier and spare themselves the pain of living in a country which is now a broken shell deep in recession and with no hope of ever recovering.

“I was told by my Health Officer that I had thirty more years to live. It upset me a great deal and the thought of living for more than a few years in this country is driving me crazy,” Reg McFarlin, from Hammersmith told ITN’s London Tonight program.

Millions of people in the UK are now living in a form of purgatory, stuck in misery and waiting eagerly for their moment to come sooner and not later.

It seems being given thirty or forty more years to live in today’s Britain is proving too much for some people who in their eagerness to end their misery have taken to jumping off the cliffs of Dover in their thousands — and they’re the lucky ones.