17.7 C
London
Saturday, April 27, 2024
secret satire society
HomeBusinessHappy New Fiscal Cliff Year

Happy New Fiscal Cliff Year

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Brace for impact! It's going to be a bumper year in 2013 thanks to the morons in the U.S. Congress who couldn't come up with a Fiscal Cliff deal before January 1st 2013.

“His people said no, our people said something, maybe it was no, or was it undecided, and those people over there in the corner, I don’t even know who they are, said no too. So we got a lot of no votes, no yes votes and a shit load of no-noes,” Senator James Jenkem, told CNN today after everyone went home.

When America sneezes…

The consequences of the no votes on the stock market tomorrow will be a serious no no, and a major rollercoaster ride for everyone — not just the American markets.

“Let’s just say that you can kiss your pension plan goodbye tomorrow. Happy New Year by the way,” a GOP senator told reporters outside Congress today. Naturally, the negotiations are all about getting a deal at the last moment and propelling the stock markets up when a fragile deal is eventually done.

Another Congressman who was at the Fiscal Cliff hearing meetings said: “Even if the U.S. government were to confiscate the riches and equity of every person in America tomorrow, the interest on America’s debts would not be able to be paid — let alone 0.1% of the actual U.S. debt.”

Happy f*cking New Year!

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press
curtis-press

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!

Translate »