Tony Blair to Give Missing Eight Million Pounds to Iraq Charity

Peccatum tacituritatis

LONDON – England – A recent expose on Tony Blair's finances revealed that he only paid £315,000 tax out of his yearly income of £12 million although declaring £3.6 million operating costs.

Tony Blair has vowed to give the £8 million he made through dodgy deals last year to an Iraqi fund for murdered Iraqi babies bombed by the US and UK war planes.

“It’s the least I can do. We pumped those lil bastards full of shrapnel and depleted uranium and it was fun at the time but I started to get a conscience eventually damn it. I turned over a new leaf, all the money I acquired through backhand deals and dodgy arrangements is eventually going to go somewhere useful — to help the damage Dubya and I caused,” Mr Blair said from one of his London mansion houses.

Analysis of Mr Blair’s accounts show that he only paid a very small amount of his income to the Inland Revenue and it is a good thing that instead of spending the £8 million profit on god knows what luxuries, he’s going to redistribute the cash to a country which was permanently crippled by his actions.

There was cheering in the streets of Iraq at the news of the Tony Blair £8 million donation as people celebrated the good will of Tony Blair.

Unfortunately for the people of Iraq, they were not told that the Blair money will be siphoned through some subsidiaries in Iraq, then transferred to Mr Blair’s private account in the Cayman Islands.