Traces of 'Cow Meat' Found in British Burgers

LONDON – England – The Food Standards Agency (FSA) was investigating a firm supplying meat in Britain after tests found that it may have traces of cow DNA.

Food and farming minister David Heath said: “Obviously somewhere along the line the burgers were contaminated with cow meat. This is highly unnacceptable and heads will roll for this.

He added: “This is an absolutely unacceptable situation and to think for one second that an ounce of cow meat got into a burger full of horse, donkey, raccoon, skunk, pork, giraffe, jackal, rat, cat and dog meat makes me sick to the core.

Alfie Nocks, a factory worker, 42, from Hartlepool was disgusted at the news: “When I heard off the telly that the burgers I been eating had cow meat in ‘em I chundered over the missus. Everything else mate, but not cow, innit!”

All burgers in the UK have now been recalled as of yesterday.

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  • Ben

    Oh the Irony!

  • Nana Mousecurry

    Err.. Kate.. this website is a HUMOUR site .. its satirical..
    -note for the future.. not everything you read is true. sorry.
    Nana

  • kate

    cow meat is BEEF oh the idiocy