People will be fined for misgendering the gender-fluid names of the various fires that are still raging around many Los Angeles districts, a spokesperson for the Inclusivity and Gender Equity office revealed today.
“We have had reports that fire Kenneth was misgendered and fire Janice along with fire Dorothy were misgendered by people, including numerous news reporters. These individuals were tracked down, and fined $1,000 each. They will also be required to attend a mandatory Misgender Re-education class for a six-month period. If they do not attend, or refuse to pay the fines, they will be arrested and jailed. Have a nice day.”
Serious Misdemeanour Crime
Residents have to remember that the pronouns for the Los Angeles fires can change at any moment, especially as the winds change direction. There are also plans to designate pronouns for the various winds that fan the pronouns of the fires.
Misgendering in California is a very serious crime, and the fires burning large swathes of Los Angeles down have compounded this issue.
Tiffany Pumpmyazzhard for the L.A. Misgender Office revealed that funding is being diverted from the LAFD to tackle this very important issue.
“Don’t you dare misgender those pronouns, darlings. Zee will fine they/them/it whether you’re them, they zee, zis, thy, zy, hiss or a lowly cis white male.”
FACT CHECK: There are currently 56,423 gender pronouns active at any time that people have to memorise. The list is updated by the second by the Los Angeles Misgender Observatory, which recently received a $300 million yearly budget from the L.A. Mayor Karen Bass and Governor Newsom.
THE KENNETH FIRE IS ZEE! DO NOT MISGENDER IT!