“We can’t find any horses in Europe any more. We’ve eaten them all and we need to bring in horses from South America or North America,” Edoardo Montelban, a conservationist for the World Wildlife Fund based in Madrid, Spain told the BBC yesterday.
There has not been a horse race in Britain for weeks as there are no horses left in mainland Britain.
“Someone ate the whole bloody 2.30 Cheltenham race and now we’ve just got a retired John McCririck running up and down the course commentating on non-existent horses,” a race punter said.
If anyone sees any horses in the UK please contact: Horse Conservation Group, Not the Findus Factory, Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, GL2 AAA