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Daily Squib Interviews Left Wing Darling Justin Trudeau

MAGGOTTY - Jamaica - The Canadian prime minister, Justin Trudeau was kind enough to allow our Daily Squib reporter to interview him.

Here at the Squib we rarely get to interview such a leftie darling as Canadian prime minister, Justin Trudeau, who can’t put a foot wrong for the socialist class who adore him so much.

We travelled to his hut on a beach in Jamaica, where the mere wafts of sensimilla make your head burst wide open, and the sweet sounds of reggae music flow through the atmosphere plotting an assured course towards the Canadian prime minister.

DS: Nice to meet you sir, how are you?

Trudeau: Waa gwaan..Jamaica biiig miss tayk ah commin hier bwoy?

DS: Let’s get started, shall we? Delving into the issue of institutional design involves effectiveness. How can institutions in International politics be designed, or modified, in ways that would make them more technically effective in attaining collective purposes, from restoring peace in war-torn societies to facilitating non-discriminatory trade, protecting human rights, and preventing damage to the global environment?

Trudeau: Wo d yuh tink mi am? Gwan git outta hir! Im guh fi guh smok dis ganja (sniffs loudly). Now shot opp wid fi yuh tullkin’!

DS: Our second question, if you please. What is the extent and depth of human obligations to other human beings, extending across political and cultural boundaries? For example, do people in Europe and North America have obligations to people in Africa, simply as a result of our common humanity? To what extent are moral obligations limited by shared bonds of historical experience and community?

Trudeau: Haile Selassie! Yuve gat mi diere Mandem mi don destan ah wud yuse say!

DS: Thank you, this interview has concluded.

Trudeau: Inna de morrows. Likle more. Mi cian now smoke dis ganja inna peace!


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