“We call it the Lego ship because it resembles..er..you know a kid that built a ship out of Lego,” Admiral Barnwall Sturmer, told the Navy Times.
Billed as a stealth destroyer invisible to radar, the ship can be seen from miles away with a $2.99 pair of binoculars from Walmart.
“You can see this ship from space it stands out so much. Hell it has massive sheet metal sides easy for targeting. All you need is a few missiles slamming into the side and it’s toast,” a nervous Navy sailor said as he boarded the ship for the first time.
The Russians were asked to comment on the ship on Monday, but all that was heard were cackles of laughter and guffawing.
Priced at $4.4 billion it’s just another death trap piece of floating sardine can junk that would see the seabed as soon as a war broke out.