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Kim Jong-un Orders Assassination of North Korean Despotic Leader

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“I’ve had enough of this guy, he is going around assassinating everyone!” North Korean leader, Kim Jong-un said during a visit to a shampoo factory in Pyongyang, the capital of the communist country.

The despotic leader then went on a tirade about the injustices this leader had committed, especially with members of his own family.

“He terrible. He fed his own uncle to starving dogs, and had his own half-brother poisoned by a nerve agent that is classified as a weapon of mass destruction. What an awful guy. When I have him executed, he will feel the full wrath of Kim Jong-un,” the leader said about himself.

It is reported that during the tirade, an aide stupidly decided to point out that Kim Jong-un was that despotic leader, and he was simply talking about himself, and wanted to execute his own person.

Needless to say, that aide was executed on the spot.

Britain to Hold Referendum on Whether to Keep Scotland

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“We pay them all that money and yet they’re moaning and groaning about one thing or another. I say we hold a referendum on whether Scotland should be a part of the United Kingdom,” Mrs May told the House of Commons, much to the derision of SNP members present.

According to the Barnett Formula an extra £1,623 per head, or 19 per cent, is given to Scotland compared to England.

In 2013 Scotland got £10,152 per head, Wales got £9,709 and England got £8,529.

If the moaning Sturgeon, a rogue element just out to stir shit, does not appreciate the sacrifices England makes to keep Scots up to their eyeballs in cheap heroin, deep fried mars bars, waning North Sea reserves and booze, then it is obvious that a new even higher Hadrian’s Wall should be built, and the Scots should be left in their own destitution.

“Under new plans, we would build a wall so high bordering England and Scotland that it would resemble something from Game of Thrones. Let them squabble amongst themselves, the snivelling conniving shisters they are,” an angry Englishman revealed whilst downing a large pint in some pub yesterday.

Is Mourinho Blaming Everyone Else?

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Instead, the Portuguese, apparently unhappy at the number of fixtures that United have had to play in recent weeks, declared that the Red Devils had “a lot of enemies” among footballing authorities.

It’s not the first time that the irascible coach has sought to pin the blame on others during his managerial career – in spells at Real Madrid and Chelsea, Mourinho attacked everyone from Iker Casillas and Eden Hazard to his physio and his next-door neighbour’s cat (okay, we’re only kidding on that one) for poor results.

Does Mourinho have a tendency to create scapegoats?

During his unhappy time in charge of Real Madrid, Mourinho was accused by the club’s president Ramón Calderón of blaming his players for their failure to overhaul rivals Barcelona, rather than taking responsibility for his own tactical or managerial mistakes. Club legend Casillas – undisputed number-one goalkeeper at the club for over a decade – was the main victim of Mourinho’s tendency to throw his players under the bus, which, rumour has it, he also likes to park from time to time.

The Spain captain was dropped in favour of Diego López during Mourinho’s final season at the Bernabéu, and was accused of leaking dressing room information to other clubs. Of course, the fact that Madrid ended up 15 points behind Barcelona in the league had nothing to do with their awful start to the season, when they won just one of their first four games and lost away at minnows Getafe. Your fault, Iker…

The Chelsea return

Mourinho won the title at Stamford Bridge in 2014/15, but the following season was nothing short of a disaster. After poor pre-season preparation, an over-reliance on ageing players and a failure to make any signings of note, one might have expected the Portuguese to front up as Chelsea made the worst start to a season of any Premier League champion.

Instead, Mourinho caused controversy by publicly admonishing Chelsea physio Eva Carneiro during a draw with Swansea, an incident that later led to a protracted court case and a private settlement between the two. During his time with the Blues, Mourinho also criticised Hazard, Diego Costa, the FA, referees and – bizarrely – his own children. Mourinho was finally sacked in December but, of course, it was the players’ fault that England’s reigning champions had slumped to 16th in the table.

Manchester United and the future

The controversial Mourinho has continued to plant a siege mentality at his new club.

From sidelining star players Henrikh Mkhitaryan and Anthony Martial to insisting that a loss at Hull was actually a draw, Mourinho has been box office at Old Trafford, even suggesting that having to live in the Lowry Hotel like a continental Alan Partridge was having an impact on his side’s results. This 888sport article asked if Mourinho had lost the plot at Manchester United.

With United struggling to keep pace with leaders Chelsea and the rest of the top four, can Mourinho retain his reputation as one of the world’s best coaches, or will his continued insistence that he can do no wrong keep rubbing people up the wrong way?

Obama Birth Certificate Finally Released

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It has been a long time coming but former president, Barack Hussein Obama’s real birth certificate has finally been released, this time by his own brother, Malik in Kenya.

What the original birth certificate reveals is that Obama was born in Kenya and not in Hawaii as the fake document purported. There were many inconsistencies with the fake Hawaii record but the Kenyan one is as real as it gets.

This proves that many people who doubted Obama’s right to be president were correct and one way or another, he has been in the middle of a massive forgery  and fraud attempt that fooled even the highest echelons of the U.S. hierarchy.

obama real birth certificate

Underestimate Corbyn At Your Own Risk

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Nothing can be further than the truth. The EU Referendum revealed to many the underbelly of the beast, the Remainers, who support communism, support the abolishment of the royal family and support massive tax hikes on people who have worked hard all their lives to achieve wealth.

John McDonnell, the Shadow Chancellor, a staunch Marxist Communist Bolshevik is now proposing a yearly tax of 20% to be taken from the assets of the richest. This would solve the deficit according to him, however, as it stands at £1.7 trillion, his little scheme would only raise a paltry £800 million or so.

We must not forget that this would only be the beginning, and once first blood is shed, there would have to be more. Communism means that every one is equal in poverty and misery, apart from the party hierarchy, who even have their own lanes on motorways.

Under the horrific dystopia of a Corbyn win in the election, Britain would become a communist state, and it would not be long before re-education camps were erected across the countryside, and many would try to flee to better climes only to be detained and interrogated, then summarily stripped of the rest of their wealth.

There is a great following for Corbyn, it is all encompassing, as the disenfranchised are many, the jobless, the ones who have no hope, no training, no skills, doomed to a purgatory of poverty, these people have nothing to lose.

This is why Corbyn must not be underestimated, as there is a suspicion that he has some form of support from the deep state, he certainly would not have been able to hang on for so long without its help.

A Corbyn government would be a great opportunity for political purges, those would be carried out after a short time in power, then the royal family would have their budgets reduced to near zero, a precursor to their eventual demise. We would see bread queues much like happened in the former Soviet USSR, and of course, the party line would be defended by a ruthless politburo and efficient KGB-like secret service.

Britain is a nation that views its wealth from home ownership and the increase of house prices, this equity defines many Britons. Under a Corbyn government house prices in Britain would be non existent, as many would fall to state ownership for the poor families. In effect, Corbyn would let the state nationalise your home so it can be used by the unfortunates.

Nationalising the majority of housing, rail, transport, farms and manufacturing, would fall into Corbyn’s Collectivist 10-Year-Plan, as once he is elected, there will not be any other elections until he is ousted.

How does this all tie in with the EU? Well, as its aspirations to become a Soviet Superstate accelerate, Corbyn would be preparing Britain to completely amalgamate with the EU’s Soviet structure. There are a sizeable amount of EU Remainers in Britain, and their support is assured for Corbyn, from which he will dissolve the British military to be nothing more than a few garrisons, and abolish our nuclear deterrent. This is Corbyn’s key to communistic success, and union with the EU.

Communism is alive and well in Britain today, and should not be underestimated.

Wikileaks CIA Hacking Leak Latest

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Hello Jason Bourne, did you know anything about this? Blackbriar? Treadstone?

It’s not as if these Wikileaks revelations are anything new, the CIA is an intricate very focused spy service, that can easily turn off your engine remotely whilst you are travelling at 120 miles per hour on the motorway, they can have one of their assets easily dispatch you in the middle of Euston station, or order one of their drones to put a missile up your ass whilst out in the hills, or languishing in your sitting room watching your smart TV.

Vault 7

The ingenuity of the CIA is to read what you wrote before you use that so-called encrypted app, because they have the back door, it was there when your smartphone was made in the factory.

This leak from Wikileaks will not weaken the CIA, an outstanding ruthless machine of the state, but will strengthen it as it will have to think about more ingenious ways to listen to people, and if they are suspected of whatever the CIA deems as terrorism or endangering the deep state, they will dispatch these people without even a sniff.

As for Julian Assange, ensconced deep within the bowels of the Ecuadorian embassy in London, he is admirable in having the biggest balls this side of river, however if the CIA want to get this guy, they will, one way or another.

Sacked Heseltine Back to Strangling Dogs

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One would think he would be annoyed at such an action, however according to the peer himself, it has freed up some time for his greatest love — strangling Alsatians.

“All these jobs I held in the Lords took up way too much of my time, thus I will shed not one tear at their loss. I will continue strangling dogs to death, as it is my hobby you know. I like to strangle one in the morning, then one or two in the afternoon. On a good day, I can go through five or six, not including puppies,” Heseltine quipped whilst feigning strangulation.

If you are wondering what Heseltine does to the dogs once they are strangled to death, it is no surprise that he is a keen taxidermist who sells his creations to other sick fucks who like that sort of thing, and the meat goes to local takeaways for a little extra profit.

“My Alsation, Alfie, who I strangled. I still have him up on the book case in the study. Every time I go in there, it’s a reminder of the power of my hands, how his poor eyes bulged as I put the pressure on. Lovely memories.”

Confused Feminist Celebrity Shows Off T*ts

“I use my female body and looks to get ahead in the celebrity and acting world. If I was an ugly female, fat and podgy I would not be looked at, so for that I am glad, but I’m still a feminist,” Emma Watson revealed to Vanity Fair magazine.

So why has Ms Watson shown off her delightful mammaries in an exclusive titillating photo shoot?

“People like tits. I showed mine off because men and some women like to look at my beautiful body and it is aesthetically pleasing to the eye. Feminists don’t realise that the female body when in its prime is a powerful weapon and tool for women to get ahead and has been used for centuries for that very purpose. There is no leading actress today or in the past who has not slept with the right person to get the job. Men are easily controlled by the female body, and we as women have been taking advantage of that fact. It’s all biological. Men are attracted to the pleasing shape of the female body, and this biological attraction is utilised by women to get what they want. As for feminism, as a fickle celebrity, I was enraptured by the Soviet spirit of the Obama presidency and its peddling of feminism, which has sadly passed. Feminism is a soviet communistic construct created primarily by men so that there could be an increase in taxpayers and workers. Without housewives languishing in their homes all day, the work force, and taxpayers doubled over night. This is what feminism really is.”

When asked about the efficacy of feminism within society, the celebrity feminist answered in a forthright manner.

“Feminism within modern society has created many divergent outcomes. For example, today women are more stressed, they lose their hair earlier, they are getting more breast cancer, they are now dying earlier, and feminists have contributed to the destruction of the traditional family. Socialists and communists who created feminism, do not want functioning families to exist, primarily because it strengthens society and conservative values. and this is a threat to the socialist state. They would much prefer angry women postulating about their feminist virtues and socialistic prowess, as good workers and taxpayers who do not care to have a family yet may still breed future taxpayer bastards by the dozen different males they briefly use as sperm donors, or if you are true feminist, breed only a female through IVF.”

Ms. Watson was also asked about feminist values regarding men opening doors for them, as well as politically correct niceties.

“Well we all know that political correctness is another term for censorship. By limiting the language allowed to be used by people, it is a form of control, it is also a form of censorship that limits human freedom and is the mainstay of socialism. Men open doors for me all the time, as a feminist, I like the power that I get as a female to have doors opened for me, and feminists may say this is wrong however I think this is the ultimate in feministic control over men. Some feminists do not appreciate a man opening the door for them and will shout down the male in question. These feminists are the angry man-hating ones who can either never get fucked because they are too ugly, or are the horrible ones, users and maladjusted schizoids with serious mental issues. I myself fall under the adored feminist mark, where I use my beauty to get what I want at every turn without exception, yet still am able to read feminist literature and understand it.”

The feminist celebrity was asked how many feminist books she had read.

“I like to read as many feminist articles and books as possible to indoctrinate my mind with clever pseudo political feminist phrases I can use in conversations to impress the fellow socialists I hang out with, or to put down impertinent males who do not pass the soviet feminist tests we give every day. Feminism, much like Communism, is a religion.”

Asked about the difference between feminism and lesbianism, the actress reacted quite abruptly.

“Feminism is a form of homosexuality, because it indoctrinates women into the theories of self on self love. Feminism in effect rejects the male patriarchy, it rejects marriage, coupling and it rejects love between the natural male and female. To be on the extreme side of feminism is therefore to reject all males and embrace only females. This is lesbianism in political form, and eventually leads to lesbianism in sexual physical form. Women are natural lesbians, and to enjoy the gentle caress of a woman is implicit to feminism and true sisterhood.”

Corrupt Obama Presidency Like Dog Shit On Shoe That Never Goes Away

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To many Americans, Obama was always a disgrace to office, but now he could be publicly disgraced and maybe have charges brought upon on him for his illegal activities. Complicit with his cronies in the FBI, NSA and CIA, there are still many factions within these organisations who are under the corrupt wing of Obama, who has taken up a role outside the presidency as some sort of clandestine operative to try and impeach Trump.

Obama, always the ultimate control freak, not only heavily controlled and censored the media during his tenure, but still has the likes of CNN, MSNBC, New York Times and Huffington Post under his control.

Corruption

The corruption, and cronyism within Obama’s government extends outside his presidency, as many have pledged allegiance to his Marxist ideals.

Trump, of course, will find all of this very troubling, and his efforts to ban leftist Obama news services from the White House may seem childish at first, but once you come to understand the bias of these so-called ‘impartial’ news services towards the left side of the political spectrum, it is clear that Trump has done the right thing in his own mind, however, one must have balance, and Trump is exhibiting an authoritarian stance in a world that should appreciate both sides of any story. He is in effect falling into the Obama trap, where Obama would heavily punish and censor any news that did not exhibit a left wing socialist homosexual viewpoint.

As far as internet conglomerates like Google, Amazon and Facebook, these are all socialist left-wing denizens of Obama, and we have yet to see how they will fare under the auspices of Trump. These internet companies all do not pay much tax, and maybe in the future, things will change unless they embrace a more impartial stance to their political outlook and operations.

Obama the dog shit

After eight long suffering years under a Marxist president, the United States is going to have to shake off this evil spectre of Obama haunting the corridors with his vile shadow. His corruption goes so deep into the rabbit hole that it disappears into eternal blackness, and Obama has corrupted and infiltrated every corner of the super state he has helped to grow. A super-socialist government of extreme budgetry waste, of spending never before seen by any president in the history of the United States. Of course the stock market went up with Obama, it would if a trillion dollars every few months was released under the auspices of treacherous RINOs like Boehner and Ryan.

Obamagate

No one is insinuating that there was never corruption before Obama, but let us say that under his nefarious rule, it got to pandemic levels. Obama even went as far as to bug U.N. Secretary General, Ban Ki-Moon, Merkel, Netanyahu and Sarkozy. If Trump is to shake off the black viscous smelly shadow of Obama, he is going to have to utilise CIA, FBI operatives who are under his rule, not Obama’s, and he is going to have to find and present some real evidence, presented to the people to see for themselves, and once this is done, Obama will be finally disposed of, a taint on the U.S. flag, a distant memory much akin to that time you stepped on a dog shit in the park that one day, you want to forget, the smell, and how it was hard to wipe off the grooves from under your shoe, water, sticks, rubbing on grass, it took ages but still the smell lingered. Obama is that dog shit on a shoe. The smell of Obama just does not want to go away.

House of Lords to be Made into Art Gallery

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“We already have a nice wide space and although the lighting needs a little work, we can achieve a wonderful gallery for the works of art to languish and the public to enjoy,” senior curator, Miles Spencer told the BBC.

The second largest unelected political group next to China, the House of Lords costs taxpayers £100 million per year and frankly does not contribute anything to the country.

“The House of Lords is basically a parasitical group of freeloaders who do not do anything good for the nation, and these parasites only take, they are paid so much money for not doing anything that they are completely useless unelected arseholes,” one parliament insider revealed.

Although the art gallery installation will be free for the public to attend, there will be a restaurant and cafe as well as shop for revenue.

“No one will miss the Lords, and a functioning gallery will be a true service to the public and Westminster as a whole. We have already produced a White paper on the proposal and the final decision will be implemented without the consent of the Lords, who will have no say on anything from now on. As a member of the Commons, I can’t wait to come and see some great works of art after parliamentary sessions in what used to be the House of Lords, maybe some Monet, Picasso, or Rembrandt, as opposed to some dour unelected meddling overpaid useless prat called a Lord,” an elected member of the House of Commons added.