Having a French Accent Not Deemed Exciting in France

PARIS – France – The French language is known around the world as the language of ‘amour’ but in France no one really cares, a recent poll has revealed.

“I am frankly not excited by the French accent, and I don’t know what everybody is saying about it being sexiiie, most people here sound like cochons, and not loveurs. Merde, I just stepped in poodle poopé,” Jacqueline Bidet, a Parisian barmaid told a visiting CNN news crew after the poll result had been released.

The surprising poll results compiled by the French Bureau de Statistiques National have surprisingly not surprised the French at all.

“Il n’est pas surprising pour les Francais. Nous just get on avec being Francais..”